This article could easily lead us into a comparison of self-esteem and
self-worth. Attempts at building self-esteem can be temporary and transitory.
Building self-worth, on the other hand, is more permanent and stable.The article relates how Rachel had low esteem for years, failing to recognize
those around her who were lending support. They may have been making honest
attempts to build her esteem--something we all do to those loved ones around us
who are struggling. Some of their efforts could have succeeded, others
failed.Her bishop and a professional counselor apparently knew how
to help her rebuild her self-worth--which took commitment, time, and effort.It's possible that in our attempts to build up self-esteem in
ourselves or others, we quit too early or rely on fast fixes too heavily.
Building self-esteem may be a method for getting to self-worth, but it
isn't an end in itself. Without continual effort, the attempt may falter or
fail. The ultimate goal should be to build or to restore self-worth.
If we settle only for temporary and fleeting steps centered only on self-esteem,
we're basically walking in place--in danger of stumbling or falling.
I've lived this. I chose to keep my baby. She is now a beautiful 34 yr old
wife, mother, and fantastic person. And we have four awesome grandkids. I'm
very blessed! Things have worked out so good for me. But it wasn't easy.
Repentance is key. I eventually met my eternal companion and he adopted my
daughter and she was sealed to us on our wedding day! Ironically, I could not
get pregnant again. We eventually adopted another beautiful girl who is also
fantastic! Blessings galore!I had a "friend" say to me,
"Do you think you couldn't have another baby because you were being
punished for getting pregnant when you weren't married?" (I have
forgiven her) I admit that thought crossed my mind. But I KNOW that's not
how Heavenly Father works. And I KNOW that's not how the Atonement works.
And I KNOW the Holy Ghost has been there to comfort me. I'm so grateful for
this knowledge. Again, life hasn't always been easy and I haven't
always had the best attitude but I just keep on trying. Heavenly Father
hasn't given up on me and I won't give up! I hope this helps someone
struggling through this.P.S. Concerning adoption, we like to say
"placed", not "given up". Words are powerful.
I like the following explanations in the scriptures about grace, and this young
woman qualifies:"Now to him that worketh is the reward not
reckoned of grace, but of debt." (Romans 4:4.)"[B]y grace
are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:
Not of works, lest any man should boast. " (Ephesians 2:8-9.)
Tragedy and good ideas bring people together. The personal ones only effects
only you. No one can dish out more punishment than yourself. I wish you well.