Aunt of baby who died in hot car says tragic accident is 'eating away' at infant's family

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  • Sal Provo, UT
    Aug. 4, 2014 10:26 p.m.

    I left my four-year-old grandson in the back of the van and ran into the grocery store. I had completely forgotten he was there. I must have been in the store 30 minutes. When I opened the back of the van to put the groceries in I just about fainted to see him sitting there. Fortunately, this was in San Diego and it was not hot outside. Fortunately he quietly waited for me to return. Why was he so good to stay in the van? He could have gotten out. A stranger could have tried to get him out. So many things could have gone wrong, but didn't.

    We are human; we make terrible mistakes. I hope this mother and family can find comfort.

  • abrielsdad Orem, UT
    Aug. 4, 2014 10:23 a.m.

    Dear April and Micah, every single one of us who has had the privilege of being a parent has had temporary lapses in judgement, or in this case, a lapse of awareness. Watching and caring for children 100% of the time is simply not possible. We all could have been in your situation, but for whatever reason we were spared the agony and grief you're going through now. Please read these comments and realize that every rational, intelligent adult who has been a parent empathizes with you, and is compassionate in their sustaining of you. As a parent who has lost a child (4 yr old daughter), I can only tell you that in time, it gets better. You never forget, and don't want to, but it gets better. If anything, look for the opportunity to draw closer to your family and your Heavenly Father. My love to your entire extended family, because they are grieving along with you.

  • Maleficent Waterville , ME
    Aug. 4, 2014 10:10 a.m.

    Oh, dear sweet April and family. Most of us won't have to publicly bear the unbearable personal life altering experiences of our family. Consequences remain private or don't show up for years. But your loss of Skyah has become a community tutorial. Words are inadequate to comfort you amidst the devastating and painful mourning of Skyah that will last as long and as deep as love lives for your precious daughter. There is no timeline for the end of love. May our Father in Heaven through the atoning power of our Savior and Redeemer cover, comfort and heal your broken hearts. It is the only way.

  • cougararesstill1 Las Vegas, NV
    Aug. 4, 2014 10:00 a.m.

    There is a reason this is a crime in Nevada. She may be a wonderful person, but what she did was wrong. Sad. And wrong. Good people make mistakes that are against the law all the time and pay for it with prosecution.

  • esodije ALBUQUERQUE, NM
    Aug. 3, 2014 10:10 p.m.

    Essentially the same thing happened to a family here in ABQ about 30 years ago. Little girl's older siblings locked her up in a car trunk on a hot day, and the parents didn't miss her until it was too late. Absolutely devastating to all concerned.

  • pianist Salt Lake City, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 9:07 p.m.

    Harsh and negative judgments about this terrible tragedy will not only hurt the mother but also the father and the other children. Sympathy and love will be the only thing that will really help all of them, along with kind and helpful counseling. My deepest condolences to them -- may their faith, their knowledge of the plan of happiness and the love of the Lord and all of those around them help to bring them the comfort they need. I am convinced that this family can all be together again, especially if those around them will love and care for all of them, especially the mother.

    Aug. 3, 2014 9:02 p.m.

    Dear April,

    If it were possible for everyone who has made a simple mistake to hug you and offer love and support, the line would stretch for miles. Lean on your loved ones, ignore the immature comments, and get professional help for this challenge. With time, you will come to understand God's plan far better than most, and your heart will heal.

    Love to you from another imperfect traveler making his way along life's rocky path.

  • Katy Bristow United Kingdom, 00
    Aug. 3, 2014 6:10 p.m.

    I know from experience the loss of a child/children is very devastating. My God bless YOU and your beautiful family with His grace and mercy!! I certainly don't mean to be mean or criticizing but I think it is a little wrong that donations are being taken for the "family to heal" What's done is done, mistakes were made, I don't see how money can help this family in any way. I do however think this fund should be donated to charities to raise awareness for example Kids and Cars, or to the air ambulance service, or to charities that help people affected by such tragedies. This child's death should not be in vain, think of the lives she could save, the families that will never have to go through the same tragic loss. Make the world remember her! May we all learn from each others mistakes as well as our own x May God bless YOU with peace at this time, YOU are in my thoughts and prayers! Best wishes and God bless! May the knowledge that you will be reunited one day bring you peace and may your angel watch over you x

  • mrjj69 bountiful, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 4:49 p.m.

    as long as parents are human, these things happen. don't be so hard on the mother.

  • Heidi T. Farmington, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 3:16 p.m.

    This tragedy could have happened to any mother. I am praying for this family.

  • Grace Bakersfield, CA
    Aug. 3, 2014 3:09 p.m.

    Tragic- yes. Preventable- certainly. Understandable- debatable.

    Prayers, condolences- yes.

    Counseling- absolutely: For the sake of any future babies whose mothers are too busy to watch over them.
    If you are going to be entrusted with God's creations, they come first. We've all gotten too busy, done things we regret.
    But not checking on a napping 11-month old till 1:00? Never.

  • a lone voice Cedar City, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 2:31 p.m.

    A mistake? yes it was. But even mistakes have consequences. As my old pappy told me "You can choose your actions, but you can't choose your consequences"
    There are legal statues that deal with situations like this. As bad as the mother feels about this "mistake", how do you think the baby felt those last few hours?

  • RDJntx Austin, TX
    Aug. 3, 2014 2:29 p.m.

    For those that say "she needs to simplify her life" or "how could a loving mother possible do this" or " I would NEVER forget my kid in the car, and for those that need to know they are not alone I would suggest reading this article from the washington post, I can't post the link but do a google search for "Fatal Distraction: Forgetting a Child in the Backseat of a Car" it is an article on the issue, very well written and contains some surprising data

  • one old man Ogden, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 1:04 p.m.

    As a father who sometimes forgot to pick the kids up at daycare, I can relate to this.

    A good friend, while loading all his flock into the car after church, left the newborn in its carrier on the ground and barely missed running over it as he backed out of the parking spot. (Mother was at home with another child who was ill.)

    Or another friend who was driving down Washington Blvd many years ago and spotted a baby carrier lying in the middle of the street. He stopped and discovered a baby -- unhurt and apparently quite happy -- in the seat. He took it to the police station, arriving just as a frantic call from a mother came in. She had two other kids, a pile of groceries, and while she loaded the car had set the baby carrier on the trunk lid.

    We are all human. We are all fallible. We all have been inches away from disasters at time -- perhaps without ever knowing how close we came -- because of our human frailties.

    I hope none of our usual superior-than-everyone-else commentators will take it upon themselves to condemn this mother.

  • Riccar Moses Lake, WA
    Aug. 3, 2014 12:28 p.m.

    I am certainly too ignorant, but wouldn't it be wonderful if someone could invent a computer chip to be put into all baby seats to prevent this? Cars today are computers on wheels. The chip could detect that a baby was in the seat and then if the temp got up to 100 degrees it would send a message to the car and the horn would start honking. It does not seem like that would be too difficult for the gurus of today to develop. It shatters me every time that I hear of these tragedies. God bless the family and especially the poor Mother.

  • DEW Cougars Sandy, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 12:09 p.m.

    You know, this is a private matter when it comes to this. I am so sorry this tragic happen to this little girl and to the family. We and I are not the one who judge other people lives. I read this what happen on the last article but no detail how this event happen and I didn't judge which was a good thing.

    Aug. 3, 2014 12:08 p.m.

    Having lost a son and three young grandchildren; I can understand some of what this family is feeling at this time! While regrets and "what ifs" will always be with them, it is my hope that they will try to dwell on the love they had for this sweet child and the love that she had for them. I wish you peace!

  • Katy Bristow United Kingdom, 00
    Aug. 3, 2014 12:00 p.m.

    I'm very sorry to hear of the loss of your child. It is not what is expected and definitely doesn't follow the circle of life! I know from experience that losing children is very very devastating. Mistakes are made every day, sometimes they come to very devastating results, sometimes people are very blessed and never have to live the "what could have been". I know the path you are about to walk very well :( Its not easy, while the circumstances of losing my children was definitely different, the feeling of loss, the anger at the unfairness, etc are not easy to deal with, I fear you will be your worst enemy at this time. No one is perfect, no one is without error or mistakes therefore have no place to judge. Part of me wants to be angry, to say "how could you possibly forget your child in a car" But the fact is, when our routines are disrupted it rarely makes for a good day, things rarely go right. :( Everything happens for a reason, and sometimes we just have to accept not being able to understand sadly.

  • O'really Idaho Falls, ID
    Aug. 3, 2014 11:26 a.m.

    There but for the grace of God go any one of us in a similar circumstance. May the Lord's comforting arms be around this family and know our hearts are filled with compassion. May this mother be relieved of guilt but know her sweet babe is in the Lord's arms till they meet again.

  • caf Bountiful, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 11:25 a.m.

    This is a nightmare that many mothers have. How awful that this poor mother is living it. We all make mistakes and this sort of mistake is one of the most horrifying. This incident does not indicate criminal behavior or anything that the law should prosecute. This was a terrible accident and my prayers go out for the family. They need love, understanding and support.

  • xert Santa Monica, CA
    Aug. 3, 2014 11:19 a.m.

    It's wonderful to see the outpouring of sympathy here and I would only hope that the same level of tolerance would be given to a person who perhaps had no neighbors or extended family to talk about what a wonderful parent they are. I would hope that no matter what the persons color, beliefs or economic situation, we could stand back and say "there but for the grace of God..." in the same way that so many have to this unfortunate Mom and family. Not to sound critical of kind thoughts, but sometimes it seems we extend tolerance and forgiveness to some and a harsher and less tolerant tone for others.

  • Utah Businessman Sandy, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 10:48 a.m.

    I express my deepest sympathy for this sweet, beautiful mother who is suffering so much from this very tragic experience. Sister, know that many, many people love you and are praying for you at this time. The light will come. Hang on! Pray, and hang on!

  • USAlover Salt Lake City, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 10:38 a.m.

    Accidents, distractions and forgetfulness happens to the very best of parents. Ignore the haters. God bless you and your family.

  • FDRfan Sugar City, ID
    Aug. 3, 2014 9:40 a.m.

    As I look back at what could have happened to my children because of my actions I just marvel. It just happened differently here.

  • hockeymom Highland, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 9:03 a.m.

    This is such a sad thing. It is understandable how a change in routine would throw someone's memory off long enough to be the crux of an accident like this. Someone please invent a car seat device that alerts the parents if the car seat is not removed within seconds of the car shutting off. The baby should be the first thing out of the car. A guest on a talk show emphasized the correct order to load or unload a car in every circumstance:

    First: Kids
    Second: Your Purse
    Third: Groceries and other things

    He stressed this order of priority, as each of these should be protected in that order of importance. You put your least easy to replace things in and out first. Hope that helps us all prevent such a tragedy in the future.

    Any other ideas, people have out there - please share for the benefit of us all!

  • Kelly Atkinson Salt Lake, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 8:54 a.m.

    As a society we are so quick to judge! We compare our best qualities against somebody else's worst qualities. It's a way to elevate our self importance. In a terrible tragedy, like this one, it is best to find solace in the good book. Matthew 7 verse 1 says, "Judge not, that you be not judged." This very popular verse is often quoted however verse 2 of that same Chapter is seldom quoted, "For with what judgment ye judge, you shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again."

    May God comfort you and give you peace.

  • Mormonmama0106 Phoenix, AZ
    Aug. 3, 2014 8:40 a.m.

    My heart just aches for this family. There is no greater tragedy than to lose a child. I have four children, including a toddler, and this is one of my greatest fears. This family is in my prayers.

  • NeilT Clearfield, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 7:10 a.m.

    This is a tough situation that has happened before. I don't think punishing the mother will accomplish anything. There is justice and there is mercy. I favor mercy in this situation.

  • Lolly Lehi, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 6:57 a.m.

    As difficult as it will be, April will have to forgive herself. The bad memory of the day of the tragedy must not overwhelm the previous joys of having Skyah in their home. Criticism and blame should not be a part of anything. Love and forgiveness as Christ would do, should prevail.

  • NVNative Las Vegas, NV
    Aug. 3, 2014 6:18 a.m.

    April and Family, so sorry to hear of this tragic accident. I can only imagine the pain you must be going through. I have two grown children myself. I believe regret is the greatest sorrow and losing a child, the greatest pain that a mother can bear. Please know that everything happens for a reason and God loves you. Your beautiful, perfect child is now with her Father in Heaven again. Your husband and your boys need you. Read the book, Believing Christ! It will help you through your pain. Christ didn't just die for sin, he died for every sorrow we may feel also. Forgive yourself! You and God know it was a mistake. You still have a beautiful family and families are forever! Don't let the negative comments destroy you! Pray for strength and The Lord will be there. Time is the only thing that will heal along with prayer. God Bless you!

  • I M LDS 2 Provo, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 5:38 a.m.

    Such a beautiful, precious little girl! There is no better placer for her than in her mothers loving arms. Such a devastating tragedy.

  • Long Lost America Salt Lake City, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 5:23 a.m.

    These are the kinds of circumstances I hope the DN censors are vigilant and do not allow the condescending judgmental posts we typically see in the other paper's forums. Families that lose children this way have suffered enough. No need for the rabid do-gooders to come out with their supposed hindsight comments.

  • cjb Bountiful, UT
    Aug. 3, 2014 12:34 a.m.

    This keeps happening and there is a relatively simple solution. The high end Prius has a solar cell on its roof that provides power to a fan that continuously brings in new outside air into the car, which expells the old air in the car. This keeps the temperature of the inside of the car to within a degree of the outside air temperature. Any car with this couldn't get hot enough to kill a child. Were the government to mandate this for all vehicles soon such deaths would be a thing of the past.

    Similarly if all cars had back up cameras in the rear of the car, many children's lives would be saved.

  • On the other hand Riverdale, MD
    Aug. 2, 2014 11:30 p.m.

    There but for the grace of God go I.

  • Mom of Six Northern Utah, UT
    Aug. 2, 2014 10:34 p.m.

    Dear Suwyn family, I am so sorry for your tragic loss. I only hope that over time God will mend the broken hearts enough to remember the happy times.

  • genbug47 Hamilton, MT
    Aug. 2, 2014 10:33 p.m.

    Oh dear, just sick for the family. I remember when I was a young mom, running around like all young mother's do, errands, honey do's, picking up parts for the tractors, delivering eggs, etc., I left our baby daughter in her car seat "Just for a second", while I ran some eggs into a place of business. Thank God it wasn't so hot that day but I have berated myself for doing that ever since and that child is now in her mid 30's and has daughter's of her own. It only takes a minute. They go to sleep, oh so very very sad for all, especially the mother. Self blame is a terrible tool of destruction. I pray she gets professional help and a lot of love from the family. God bless her, God bless the entire community for their love and support. You just don't know until you walk in someone else's shoes. This is a child, I know but please, don't blame. Please.

  • lib1 Provo, UT
    Aug. 2, 2014 10:29 p.m.

    What a nightmare. My heart goes out to the family and to the mother. Their lives will never be the same.

  • Physics27 Cedar City, UT
    Aug. 2, 2014 9:36 p.m.

    Being a father of young children myself, my heart aches for you. I can't even comprehend the measure of your grief. Sometimes things happen that we can not understand. Know that she is doing well in a far better place. I pray that you may someday forgive yourself.