Why aren't millennials getting married? Money

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  • TheProudDuck Newport Beach, CA
    June 17, 2014 1:53 p.m.

    Absent a religious conviction that marriage is honorable, what exactly is the incentive for a modern man to get married?

    Chivalry is dead -- killed as a relic of patriarchal privilege. It's no longer the case that marriage and fatherhood is viewed as an integral part of entering full and honorable manhood. It's simply one more lifestyle choice -- one that exposes you to significant legal and financial risks, without necessarily commensurate benefits that can't be obtained elsewhere.

    A Gen-Xer, I got lucky to win and be won by one splendid woman in a million. But both of us wholeheartedly agree that, among the rest of the million (propagandized with an absurd view of how the sexes relate) are many whom no man should touch with a ten-foot pole. If that isn't a scarily patriarchally violent image, which I'm sure some screecher is in the process of typing right now.

  • wer South Jordan, UT
    June 17, 2014 12:34 p.m.

    "Millennials": another word for "non committed".

  • K Mchenry, IL
    June 16, 2014 6:54 a.m.

    Chicken header.

    A person working part time grosses $600 a month on minimum wage. $1200 for full time work per month. I'd say they were very lucky to find someone to give them extra hours in the summer and pay them so well. For most the math doesn't add up.

    State college tuition is between 6K and 12K a year. That is gross minimum wage working full time and leavin nothing else.

    June 15, 2014 5:51 p.m.

    Truth, those "older people" (is that a disease?) have children who are Millennial's. That gives them insights into a problem they are watching from the vantage point of perspective, wisdom, and experience. A problem that they care about very much. It would be ignorant to discount, ignore, or exclude what they have to say.

  • truth in all its forms henderson, NV
    June 14, 2014 12:48 p.m.

    I find it interesting that you have older people who are not in this generation discussing why a millennial would do something. It should be told from that generations view point not an older generation.

  • ChickenHerder Kaysville, Utah
    June 14, 2014 11:09 a.m.

    Wraith I respectfully disagree. My sons work each summer and by working both a full time job and part time job earn $6000-$7000 (net) during the summer which is enough to pay for tuition and books at most in-state colleges. They work part-time during the school year to pay for living expenses. There is a confidence and self-assurance that they learn when they realize that through really hard work, they can pay for college, while taking out no or minimal loans and I think is a lesson that translates well to their future employment and family life. I think we sometimes cripple our children by doing too much for them, both as parents and as a society.

  • The Wraith Kaysville, UT
    June 13, 2014 3:58 p.m.

    I want to echo what Chris B said and add to it a bit if I can. More individuals are going to college now that at any other time. That adds another major strain on money, especially if both parties in the marriage are trying to finish college. In the 1960's it was fairly easy to work for the summer and earn enough to pay for tuition and books for the year. That is no longer a possibility. For many, delaying marriage until after graduation is the only viable answer.

  • george of the jungle goshen, UT
    June 13, 2014 12:46 a.m.

    Lack of social skills, lack of romance or anticipation, kinda like soiling Christmas.

  • I M LDS 2 Provo, UT
    June 13, 2014 12:19 a.m.

    I know of a number of millennial couples who refuse to get married until marriage equality is achieved. It is a matter of principle to them.

  • 10CC Bountiful, UT
    June 12, 2014 9:23 p.m.

    My grandparents were badly scarred by the Great Depression. The Millennials are the generation most scarred by the Great Recession.

    As Chris B astutely observed, it used to be that working hard would give you solid economic security. It used to be that any college degree would get you in the door for an entry level position in corporate America, and you could have a solid career if you didn't go off the deep end and punch somebody at work, or develop a drug or alcohol problem.

    That's not anywhere close to being enough anymore.

    Too many Millennials have seen their parents - or their friends' parents - who worked hard and played by the rules, become economic casualties in the ongoing quest for greater corporate profit. There is no such thing as economic security. If you think you have it, you're delusional... or the child of a Billionaire.

  • Vladhagen Salt Lake City, UT
    June 12, 2014 6:10 p.m.

    I think that "Serious" also has some what of a point. In 1950, if you had a child out of wedlock, you got married. Now, not so much. What is legal marriage beyond a piece of paper really? (Okay, bad can of worms to open, but....) Back a few decades ago we had people get married younger because earning a living at 18 was easier and it was the only real accepted social way to "have children" We still have just as many people, I would say, in relationships, just not as many of them have a paper to say it.

  • cjb Bountiful, UT
    June 12, 2014 5:33 p.m.

    They aren't getting married because of money? Unless one is living in their parents basement for free, getting married either takes less money to live or not that much more.

    June 12, 2014 5:14 p.m.

    My 3 children are all millenials. They are all 3 college graduates and are starting their careers. They have many friends and like to socialize. They are travelling. They are living on their own. They are enjoying their independence.

    They hope that marriage will be a one and done; they plan on marrying for life. They are not ready to do that yet. They are not yet ready to make that commitment. They have other things to do.

    I think millenials want to enjoy a part of life they know they can't experience once they are married. Right now, they can be selfish. And that's a good thing.

  • Crisco B Salt Lake City, UT
    June 12, 2014 4:07 p.m.

    I think that a reason for younger generations not getting married is money. But it is not necessarily the greed of money, but more the lack thereof. In the 1960s, I could get a job paying pretty good money by just being a hard worker. To get an equivalent job today, I need 4-8 more years of school, all the while avoiding student debt. We are not working with a 1960s white man heavy economy anymore.

  • Vladhagen Salt Lake City, UT
    June 12, 2014 4:04 p.m.

    As a "Millenial" (26) who is unmarried, believe me when I say that money is not the issue. I have a salaried job. This is not the case with everyone of course, but I think that the real reason why millenials are unmarried is unknown. There are millions of reasons. None of them is statistically significant over the others per se.

    Maybe the overarching reason: they have not found the person they want to marry and have that person agree that they want to also marry them. Marriage has become much more mutual than it was before. A woman has so much more to (rightly so) consider.

  • Serious Rexburg, ID
    June 12, 2014 3:20 p.m.

    They delay marriage because so many of them have no problem living together outside of marriage.

  • slcdenizen Murray, UT
    June 12, 2014 3:00 p.m.

    @no fit in SG

    Agreed, one toxic relationship can convince anyone close enough to view it to hedge their bets and tepidly approach relationships, often at the expense of a willingness to marry. It's not a bad thing as some might suggest, just an understandable response to experience.

    Marriage used to provide its own economic and cultural incentives several generations ago, but no longer provides any substantial benefit to a couple's life unless happiness is somehow built on sharing assets and reaping available tax breaks. One thing the older generation can do to alleviate negative consequences of the shifting dynamics is avoid scolding young people for their choices, especially if those choices are based on thorough consideration. But, to ask the spoiled boomer generation to quit their seemingly favorite pasttime might be too much.

  • andyjaggy American Fork, UT
    June 12, 2014 2:44 p.m.

    Marriage improves your economic stability. 2 incomes with close to the same living expenses. Assuming you buck the trend of ridiculously overpriced weddings I don't see why money should keep you from getting married. Having children on the other hand might be a different story.

  • no fit in SG St.George, Utah
    June 12, 2014 2:10 p.m.

    So many young adults have seen unhappy and unsuccessful attempts at marriage.
    Just ask your own children and grandchildren. They will give you numerous examples of friends and relatives who made the wrong choice for a husband or wife.
    They know they have enough money to make for a comfortable family life.
    What they don't know is how they would survive the breakup of their marriage. It is simply too frightening a possibility for them.