Fatherhood hasn't received the attention it deserves

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    Feb. 24, 2014 5:09 p.m.

    gmlewis says: society has left many men bereft of purpose and feeling worthless

    Society is not a person. Society has not done anything to men. Do you think that women were just handed the things they wanted when they chose to move into nontraditional roles? It has been a battle of many generations, and we are still not there.

    If men don't like the way they are treated by "society," it is time for men to do something about it. Women dealt with (still deal with) cruel remarks and judgmental stares as they try to move forward. Men need to be willing to be ridiculed by other men to become the husbands and fathers they say they want to be.

    Lead the way. Don't wait for "society" to open doors for you; it won't.

  • mocoregon sherwood, OR
    Feb. 24, 2014 9:47 a.m.

    When the Male members in leadership learn that denigrating Fathers and Males does not promote women, that may solve two problems.

  • Helmigr Brighton, CO
    Feb. 23, 2014 9:05 p.m.

    ThornBirds, did the father split or was he driven out by abuse in your case?

  • lindaj72 salt lake city, UT
    Feb. 23, 2014 6:09 p.m.

    I had a wonderful father who had high integrity, was kind to all and treated his wife like a queen. I had a wonderful relationship with my father. Even though I later made to bad choices in husbands, I do not hate men, I am not bitter, I have been able to forgive and move forward with my life. I believe it is because I had such a positive role model growing up.

  • Gildas LOGAN, UT
    Feb. 23, 2014 2:54 p.m.

    I think some of us are clearly thinking of this welcome article: So who finally woke you up, sleeping beauty, after a sleep of a hundred years - well fifty years anyway. Still it's still welcome now, too late for some but not for others.

  • marxist Salt Lake City, UT
    Feb. 23, 2014 1:57 p.m.

    All of us with families have had to struggle to get family time, and unfortunately, to struggle against ourselves to spend more time with our spouses and kids. Why is that? Because in our system payment, and only payment, legitimizes. Witness the difference between amateur and professional, the former weak and inadequate, the latter accomplished and legitimate. We are not paid with money for spending time with the family. Family time, once lost, cannot be regained. Timer's arrow you know.

  • gmlewis Houston, TX
    Feb. 23, 2014 12:48 p.m.

    The report that Farrell’s group produced said, “the U.S. has done a better job of integrating women into the workplace than in integrating men into the family — especially into the lives of children in the non-intact family. We have valued men as wallets more than as dads.” The result is “moms feeling deprived of resources and dads feeling deprived of purpose and children feeling deprived of the full range of parenting input.”

    The quote above from the article reminded me that this was predicted by those who feared that pushing women into the workplace would weaken the father's role in the home. I know a father who once said that he feels his only worth "is as a wallet."

    The Women's Equality movement was vitally necessary, but the article is right that society has left many men bereft of purpose and feeling worthless. "This ought ye to have done, and not left the other undone."

  • ThornBirds St.George, Utah
    Feb. 23, 2014 9:01 a.m.

    Neither does motherhood.
    Seems to be so much about the lacking of fathers recently in the DN.
    Now who again is it that picks up the pieces and keeps things going when the father splits?

  • samhill Salt Lake City, UT
    Feb. 23, 2014 6:32 a.m.

    All of the data shown from the various studies seem eminently obvious to anyone who has spent much time with children, particularly those who have endured the fracture of their family.

    I earnestly wish such obvious conclusions were as common and widespread as they were just a few decades ago.

    As more and more people lose that common-sense observational ability and the wisdom it creates, we accelerate the process of societal decay that has destroyed cultures in the past and will surely destroy ours if we continue our downward trend.