Dads want to have it all, too

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  • Ann Amberly Greenbelt, MD
    Aug. 6, 2013 7:12 p.m.

    Isn't it time for the LDS faith community, with its emphasis on the importance of families, to lead out on this issue? Shouldn't LDS businessmen make it a high priority to ensure their workers have the accommodations necessary to be able to be real parents? I think Elder Quentin Cook said it best in a recent conference talk--we LDS should be out in front in terms of developing family-friendly accommodations in the workplace. Our faith community should start right here in Utah. Maybe the Church itself could lead out in terms of its employees . . .

  • USAlover Salt Lake City, UT
    Aug. 5, 2013 8:57 a.m.

    Well said PGViking.

    If there is a stigma that fathers fear of seeming to "feminine" by wanting to be kids more, I couldn't care less.

    The older I get, the ONLY thing that seems more important everyday is my relationship with my wife and kids. Somewhere along the line, the perfect job, the nice car, the manicured yard and the image of success has faded into the sunset.

    Just give me my wife, my kids and the good health to enjoy life.

  • cjb Bountiful, UT
    Aug. 4, 2013 11:54 p.m.

    With increased in productivity technology, there is no reason we can't have it all, enough money AND time to enjoy it. How?

    Don't but the most expensive house you can afford. Buy the least you can get by with.

    Same with your car. Your clothes and your toys.

    Take care of what you have. Do timely repairs on your house and car.

    Eat healthy food. Save some out of each pay check.

    Vote for people who will put the burden of taxes on those who can afford them most. The well to do. Our country has gotten wealthier due to increases in technology over the past several decades, but all this increased wealth has gone to the top (very) few percent. If the wealth were distributed more equitably, this too would help enable all of us to earn a decent living and have time to enjoy life.

    There are jobs that aren't being filled because there aren't enough people with the required education. You can earn more by researching what these jobs are and qualifying for them. Get the (right) education. Find something that society needs and that you are interested in and enjoy doing.

  • Aggielove Cache county, USA
    July 25, 2013 4:23 p.m.

    Smaller house, don't eat out much, lesser car, decent job. That's my future. Enough of this high paying stress garbage.

  • Scottscobig Ogden, UT
    July 25, 2013 1:50 p.m.

    Did the author purposely ignore the massive single motherhood problem which we have because of our kangaroo custody courts?

    Kids are being s mothered from every angle- schools, the media, etc. It's more fathering they need to inoculate them against all of that. Mothers, themselves, have a role, sure. But the father's role has been so deemphasized, it's not hard to see how the real trend is for young men to avoid marriage and fatherhood to begin with.

  • MrsH Altamont, UT
    July 25, 2013 9:12 a.m.

    I needed this article today. My son's wife just left him...and the kids.
    But I truly believe he has it in him to be both a good Dad AND a Mom. That's just how he is. He's been very involved since day one.

    I think all Dads should be more involved with their kids, it helps both of them a lot...and you never know when you will be very glad you have done so.

  • andyjaggy American Fork, UT
    July 24, 2013 3:46 p.m.

    I've always been annoyed when I hear women talk about how they can't have it all, because guess what, men can't have it all either. I want to spend as much time with my children as possible, but I have to balance that with providing a living for my family. None of us can have it all.

  • I M LDS 2 Provo, UT
    July 24, 2013 1:40 p.m.

    Nice idea, but many fathers are not necessarily a positive influence in their family's lives. Some families are better off with an absentee "Dad".

    Different strokes for different folks. Hands-on, engaged fatherhood is not for everyone.

  • Ohio-LDS NE, OH
    July 24, 2013 12:13 p.m.

    This is a very nice article. Thank you DN. I can personally attest that modern fathers feel a need to spend quantity, not just quality, time with their children.

    We should support and applaud men who chose to be at home, even when that decision comes at the sacrifice of career or church calling.

  • PGVikingDad Pleasant Grove, UT
    July 24, 2013 11:14 a.m.

    As my children grow older, I find my priorities shifting rapidly. Suddenly, the carpet-like lawn doesn't seem such a pressing need. The weeds on the hill can wait, and the garage can be cluttered just a bit longer. And I'm not the first to volunteer for the out-of-state work trip, anymore. I have only a month left - a *month!* - before my son begins his senior year of high school. And my daughter isn't far behind. Dads, do all you can to be with your children as much as possible, because their lives without you (for the most part) begin much too soon.