Mitchell Jones' mother shares lessons learned from son's life, death

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  • MrsH Altamont, UT
    May 13, 2013 10:28 a.m.

    Words of Wisdom for sure. You made some very good points.
    Thank You!

  • chinookdoctor PASADENA, CA
    May 11, 2013 2:19 p.m.

    I am sorry to hear also about the loss of this child and NeilT's comments. It is really hard to feel valued in some communities within the church because some LDS feel that judgement is their right. I'm not sure where this comes from, but I think it is wrong and I'm sad to hear when people are hurt and question their faith, whether in the church or in God because of the blindness of some members of our church. Not every woman will be a mother in this lifetime, and not every woman wants to be. I believe we are all daughters of heavenly parents who love us and want the best for us, and I don't think the best is brought about by living a cookie cutter life. I hope you can walk your own path and find peace in it, and I hope you can do that in the church, even if people who are handicapped emotionally and spiritually try to make you feel bad.

  • Quirkyandbold Salt Lake City, UT
    May 10, 2013 10:24 p.m.

    I am so sad, NeilT, your heart is broken and you carry this burden. For six long years I was a mother but no one knew it. I was single and I chose to let my baby boy be adopted into a family with a mom and a dad - something I could not give him. That event shaped my life. I believe we, as women, don't have to give birth in order to mother and love and influence people in our lives. You are not a failure. I hope you find peace.

  • fowersjl Farmington, Utah
    May 10, 2013 10:11 p.m.

    Sorry NeilT, that you feel the way you do. I have several single friends, because of divorce, or because of never marrying, and though they are childless (and I am the mother of nine), we have a great friendship. They have never felt that the LDS culture makes them feel like they have less value. On the contrary, we are taught quite correctly and forthrightly that the Atonement of Christ will right all wrongs and balance the scales for everyone. It just may not be in this life, but it will happen for you, for all people. The righteous desires of your heart will be fulfilled. Having lost a child myself (he was 23), and suffered through the most incredible grief ever (1000 times worse than when my father and my sister died), I looked at my childless friends with a little envy, thinking "they may have missed the joy of having children in this life, but at least they do not have to suffer this wrenching, agonizing pain."

  • NeilT Clearfield, UT
    May 10, 2013 6:31 p.m.

    If a woman is single and no children then she is of lesser value in the LDS culture. How unfortunate What if a woman can't have children for biological reasons. Articles like this are one reason I am struggling with my LDS faith. When people find out I am LDS, divorced and never had children of my own they look at me like I am a failure in life.

  • CF Mom Sandy, UT
    May 10, 2013 4:30 p.m.

    Fifteen years ago when we said goodbye, I felt the same thing about my daughter. Her lifelong battle with Cystic Fibrosis taught me more about faith, patience and endurance to the end than I could have ever hoped to teach her about anything. Her fellow seminary students said at her funeral that they would often wait at the beginning of class while she filled a page with the "things I am thankful for today" assignment since the teacher would not start until all had put their pencils down. Her goal each day was to perform an act of service, even when she was "sucking air" and "coughing up a lung" her words, not mine

    I understand, these precious children are ours not to teach but to teach us. Like many of my sister mothers given this blessing, we will never be able to look at a challenge without saying "I can do this, because (Stephanie) faced and overcame so much more" Nothing stood in her way. Nothing stood in Mitchell's way. He will always be with his mom. It has been 15 years, she stands beside me every day.