'The Entitlement Trap' offers ways to help children take ownership

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  • Quagthistle Utica, KS
    Sept. 8, 2011 9:11 a.m.

    Another aspect to this problem, in my humble opinion, is the fact that children today are often given few chances to actually sontribute in a meaningful way to the world around them (outside of church service projects). I think people focus too much on the money itself, as if it will, somehow, sprinkle magical salvation from all problems if shifted this way or that. The short answer is that money itself will not solve our problems, whether those problems are on a household, county, state, national, or world-wide level. If we want our children to not feel entitled, perhaps we should focus on showing them how they can serve a meaningful purpose in the world around them. When children learn more and get more sence of fulfillment from playing video games than they do from school and life, they are more likely to withdraw into that world that gives them a chance to participate meaningfully in our world and less likely to help out around the house. Similarly, parents often require money from working teens, which usually serves to further a sence of entitlement even more. It's a large and complex problem that one bandaid won't cure.

  • richardsidman SALT LAKE CITY, UT
    Sept. 7, 2011 9:32 a.m.

    I am from the generation that is accused of feeling entitled. It is it ironic that the same folks who wrote the parenting books that my parents relied upon, the same preschool curriculum that was used in my preschool, and have spoken as authorities on parenting over the years are now complaining that my generation somehow feels entitled. And now, they are trying to fix that?

  • alwaysthinking Farmington, UT
    Sept. 6, 2011 8:23 p.m.

    @Just-a-fan: Could you elaborate please?

    I think we are quibbling over semantics here and somehow politics and liberal politicians versus the Tea Party got thrown into the mix- let's get back to the theme of the article.

    I think it is always a good idea when parents teach kids how to budget their money, save for what they want, etc. We learned the HARD way that our kids should have had checking accounts all through high school so we could teach them how NOT to bounce checks and keep close tabs on their balances, etc. Helps to look at monthly budget and see where their money goes and where the family finances are spent. I don't believe in shielding kids from financial challenges the family experiences; let them be a part of the solution. Teach them to listen to the Spirit in deciding difference between needs and wants. I don't care whether you call it ownership or stewardship, our kids took better care of their belongings when they paid for them themselves.

  • UtahBlueDevil Durham, NC
    Sept. 6, 2011 1:40 p.m.

    AZRods.... you are absolutely right, Ownership isn't in there, but then again often goes hand in hand with "entitlement". Parents often feel they are entitled to the respect and love of their kids, or often make demands of their kids by virtue of being parents - they are entitled to respect.

    Respect, trust, faith, all are earned, none are granted or given. Entitled is a pretty broad term... and I think those in uniform for this country understand very well what stewardship and responsibility are all about.

    But that is just me.

  • just-a-fan Bountiful, UT
    Sept. 6, 2011 1:19 p.m.

    These writers must watch youth and high school sports in Utah. Talk about entitlement!

  • AZRods Maricopa, AZ
    Sept. 6, 2011 11:37 a.m.

    @bluedevil, I don't see anywhere in the article where it suggests that we "own" our children or anything close to that.
    Stewardship is a great term though, I just don't think many outside the church recognize it for what it is.
    Entitlement on the other hand is clear and unmistakable.
    Sometimes over used words and phrases are still simply the best.
    Kinda like liberals.

  • UtahBlueDevil Durham, NC
    Sept. 6, 2011 10:24 a.m.

    USAlover... if you could show me in real terms how this president is spending our tax dollars any differently, I would help you back into your seat.

    But on a line by line level, spending hasn't changed hardly at all. Where, please show me, has the budget gone completely different? Today. Not two years down the road, not five... but today.

    To your last comment..... you are absolutely spot on. On some issues, I am absolutely in synch with the tea party. On other issues - views that deregulating wall street is the cure - I am not. Its how I think most people are..... issue by issue - not party vs party.

  • USAlover Salt Lake City, UT
    Sept. 6, 2011 10:08 a.m.

    @ UtahBlueDevil

    Your insinuation that "stewardship" is a word that "liberals" use almost made me fall out of my chair.

    If only, IF ONLY, our current President and "liberal" friends could even understand the word "stewardship" in regards to my tax dollars, I'd fall out of my chair again.

    In my opinion, rather than sounding like a liberal, you actually sound like a member of the Tea Party when you start asking the government for better stewardship.

  • UtahBlueDevil Durham, NC
    Sept. 6, 2011 9:06 a.m.

    "entitlement" = completely over used and over applied phrase.

    I agree with Jans - Stewardship is a great word that applies to a whole lot of situations - like our kids. We don't own or kids nor have any ownership over them.... we have a stewardship. We have a stewardship to our faith, our family, our community, our country and this planet which was given to us and to pass along to our future generations.

    But then again, that starts sounding "liberal", so I best stop right there.

  • jans Pickerington, OH
    Sept. 6, 2011 7:38 a.m.

    While I applaud the concept of teaching children to take responsibility in the family economy, I do not like the word "ownership." Rather, I think it would be wiser to switch that out and insert "stewardship" as a more accurate term, particularly for LDS families. Ownership as a concept can also lead to a sense of entitlement whereby people become selfish and miserly. Stewardship, however, properly places us in the position of caretaking, sharing and giving back without resentment.

  • dr.bridell mclean, VA
    Sept. 6, 2011 7:30 a.m.

    Strange comment by Joe....
    Don't newspapers usually do book reviews?
    As Des News readers we have been blessed with a lot of advance insights from the Eyres about Entitlement (which I agree is the biggest parenting problem of our day....if not the biggest problem of our society in general) and it is good to know that the book is now out so that everyone can get in on the solutions!

  • JoeBlow Miami Area, Fl
    Sept. 6, 2011 4:51 a.m.

    This article should be prefaced with the word