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Laura Seitz
Utah punter Mitch Wishnowsky and kicker Matt Gay hold their trophies at the Spence and Cleone Eccles Football Center at the University of Utah in Salt Lake City on Thursday, June 14, 2018.

Snow College defensive coordinator Jan Jorgensen went retro last week when he tweeted that he had been doorbell ditched by his players.

“It’s good to see the youth are putting down their electronics and getting in some old fashioned mischief,” wrote the former BYU star.

By today’s standard, “old fashioned mischief” would be armed robbery, dealing drugs and disorderly conduct, wouldn’t it?

FOOT NOTES

Utah had five players picked in the NFL draft, tied for 12th most in the country and second most in the Pac-12. Among the draftees were placekicker Matt Gay and punter Mitch Wishnowsky.

The Utes are the first team since 1985 to have both a punter and placekicker drafted in the same year.

If Dr. Scholls doesn’t offer them an endorsement deal, someone in marketing should be fired.

TRAVEL TIP

Real Salt Lake’s Nedum Onuoha refused to meet with L.A. Galaxy star Zlatan Ibrahimovic after the latter tried to apologize in the locker room for trash-talking during their game. Back in Salt Lake, Onuoha recounted the incident to local reporters, saying Ibrahimovic had threatened to injure him.

Onuoha said that in the end “ ... I just told him where to go.”

Word is he wasn’t talking about going to the beach.

WIDE-BRIM CHAGRIN

Steve Griffin
BYU football head coach Kalani Sitake talks with the media following football practice in Provo on Friday, Aug. 3, 2018.

It’s been a big year in Utah for retirements.

BYU basketball coach Dave Rose said farewell in late March, and roughly a month later, Utah gymnastics co-head coach Megan Marsden exited. Jazz sharpshooter Kyle Korver has indicated he is considering calling it quits.

Meanwhile, the Salt Lake Stallions and the Alliance of American Football went dark.

Speaking of retirings, when is Kalani Sitake going to ditch the gardening hat he wears at practice?

HORSING AROUND

Morry Gash
Luis Saez reacts after Maximum Security was disqualified from the 145th running of the Kentucky Derby horse race at Churchill Downs Saturday, May 4, 2019, in Louisville, Ky. (AP Photo/Morry Gash)

Country House was proclaimed Kentucky Derby winner after Maximum Security was disqualified.

In a fair world, the winner would have been named Minimum Effort.

TALK TOWN

3 comments on this story

The mayor of a town in the Philippines has made it illegal to gossip.

Where was he when the Ricky Rubio trade rumors came up?

THE EYES HAVE IT

Jeff Chiu
Houston Rockets' James Harden wipes his injured eye with a towel during the first half of Game 2 of the team's second-round NBA basketball playoff series against the Golden State Warriors in Oakland, Calif., Tuesday, April 30, 2019. (AP Photo/Jeff Chiu)

Houston’s James Harden temporarily left Game 2 of the Western Conference semifinals after being hit in the eye, but was OK for Game 3.

Harden told reporters, “I could barely see.”

To which several NBA refs said, “You too?”

HAPPY LANDINGS

How prevalent has Harden’s flopping become?

Sources say he’s been promised a lead role if there’s ever a remake of “Flipper.”