SPREADING THE CHEDDAR
After reaching the Super Bowl for the ninth time, Tom Brady was in classic cliché mode Sunday.
He called Kansas City’s Patrick Mahomes “a great player with a great team.” He said he was “proud of our team, ” and “the odds were stacked against us” and the Chiefs “had no quit.”
Even on National Cheese Lover’s Day, that’s a lot of cheese.
WHAT MATTERS MOST
Donovan Mitchell won’t defend his dunking title during this year’s All-Star Weekend.
He says he wants to concentrate on “helping my team make a deep run (in the) second half of the season.”
In other words, why dunk when you can slam dunk?
Ex-Jazz guard Alec Burks put up modest numbers upon his return to Utah as a member of the Cleveland Cavaliers. But he did do one notable thing: block a Rudy Gobert shot.
Once a resident of Swat Lake City, always a resident …
A SAFE PLACE
A Kansas City woman reportedly makes $40,000 a year as a “professional cuddler.” She offers comfort, understanding and reassurance by hugging people.
Sources say the Cavaliers have booked her for the entire month of February.
The Lakers’ Michael Beasley unwittingly attempted to check into a game last week wearing practice shorts.
Who could blame him? Until LeBron James returns, they’re all practice games.
China says it has created the world’s first artificial intelligence anchorman.
Here in the U.S., artificially intelligent broadcasting has been around since ESPN aired the first lumberjack championship, hasn’t it?
A Pennsylvania man was arrested after allegedly breaking into a music store and stealing two guitars, then returning to steal three more.
Reports say his only statement to reporters after his capture was this: “Go Eagles!”
There goes the last positive sports fan in Philadelphia.
A GOLDEN TEAM
DeMarcus Cousins told ESPN’s Rachel Nichols the Warriors are “the most hated team in sports.”
You mean worse than the team of Joe Tessitore, Jason Witten and Booger McFarland?
AN ‘I’ IN TEAM
Stat tracker Second Spectrum says James Harden has attempted more one-on-one plays this season than any NBA team.
The Jazz’s slogan this year is “Team is Everything.”
Looks like the Harden Rockets, er, Houston Rockets disagree.
MAJOR LEAGUE DIGS
Seattle Times writer Dwight Perry on Randy Johnson selling his 25,000-square-foot home: “In other words, a Big Unit.”