Richard Drew
Traders Fred DeMarco, left, and Tommy Kalikas confer as they work on the floor of the New York Stock Exchange, Friday, Jan. 4, 2019. Stocks are jumping at the open on Wall Street Friday as investors welcome news of trade talks between the U.S. and China and a big gain in jobs in the U.S. (AP Photo/Richard Drew)

A lighthearted look at news of the day:

Americans are an ever-hopeful lot. Cleveland Cavalier fans keep buying tickets. The Otis Elevator Co. keeps working through its ups and downs, parole boards keep watching for signs of rehabilitation. And Washington keeps swearing in new members of Congress.

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Last week, a new group of representatives and senators took the oath of office and began presiding over a government that is partially shut down. That’s frustrating. Unless they can agree with the president on how to get things going again, it will be hard to keep spending more than the American people pay in taxes.

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It’s becoming clear that the only real wall is the one between the House and the White House.

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Six years ago, Republicans and Democrats agreed that if they couldn’t reach an agreement on the budget, they would be subject to an awful thing called sequestration, which would impose cuts across the board. Today, the only things being sequestered are House Republicans.

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Want to bring any party in Washington to awkward silence? Be that guy who suggests that maybe the government should be frugal. If you want some fun, say it on the floor of the House or Senate and watch people scurry to their dictionaries.

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Meanwhile, Olympic mogul hopefuls are finding it more effective to train by investing in the stock market.

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Comment on this story

I wouldn’t say things are turbulent on Wall Street, but New York health officials should think about posting airsickness bags on the trading floor.

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Here in Utah, high-pressure systems keep making smog a part of a daily life. But don’t worry; the Legislature is set to convene soon. All that hot air should clear things out nicely.

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Lawmakers are expected to face a huge budget surplus of $1.3 billion. Maybe they should build a wall along the Wyoming border to keep all the illegal fireworks out.

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In the U.S., we celebrate the New Year by dropping a giant ball in Times Square. In China this year, they celebrated by dropping Apple stocks.