The title character in "Gordy" is a talking piglet. When he becomes separated from his parents and his brothers and sisters, all of whom have been spirited away to a sausage factory, Gordy hits the road to find them.

Along the way he is "adopted" by Jinnie Sue MacAllister (Kristy Young), the daughter of a traveling country singer named Luke (Doug Stone). At a performance for the governor, poor little rich kid Hanky Royce (Michael Roescher) falls in the pool and is rescued by Gordy, so Jinnie Sue gives the pig to the lad.

Soon, Hanky and Jinnie Sue discover that Gordy can speak. As Gordy himself says, "People can understand animals if they take the time to listen."

So, they organize a plea to the general public, and after landing on the cover of national magazines and receiving a phone call from President Clinton, Gordy and friends track down his family to rescue them from the sausage grinder.

And in his spare time, Gordy brings Hanky's divorced mother and Jinnie Sue's widowed father together.

This may have sounded like a cute idea on paper, but as kids pictures go this is the worst to come along in memory. Charmless, humorless and dull as drying paint, "Gordy" is the kind of movie parents should save for video punishment. But if they take their kids to a theater, they'll be punishing themselves.