This morning I woke up with these words on my mind: Never give up! What I have noticed over the years is that we give up before we ever get started. This has me thinking about why we do this. I am just going to write until I figure this out. I am not going to give up on you. The answer lies within each of us, and all we have to do is figure out this little puzzle.

We have been beaten down for years because of our personalities. We are creative, spontaneous lovers of life. We don't fit the born-organized mode. Yet we were probably raised by someone who wanted to make us conform to their way of thinking. That was never going to happen, but that didn't stop them from trying.

In their efforts to make us fit their ideal of how we should think, they called us names and punished us. We were told we were lazy and called daydreamers. We were accused of being stupid for not thinking like them. If the truth were really known, we are probably much more intelligent than those who tried to beat us down, and they were afraid of our creativity and joy. I can't even imagine being scared to have fun! I think you can understand this deep down in your soul. In fact, I feel sorry for them. How sad that they did not realize that it take all of us to make this world revolve!

If all of us thought alike, there would be no diversity, no new ideas. Just the same old boring thing, day after day; no smiles, just stress. Now the tears are starting to come. Those precious little children were told that they were not worthy of being loved unless they fit into that mold. This was not said out loud, but we all knew that if we didn't perform to their standards, we would be punished. In the scientific world, this is called conditioning. In pet terms, we were being trained to follow their commands even when they didn't say what they really wanted.

All we ever wanted was to feel loved. If we could not be loved for who we are, we would settle for any kind of attention. They told us if we can't do it right, don't do it at all. We were forced to repeat task after task until it was right. Even then it probably was not good for them, and we were left feeling unloved and punished.

All these years of conditioning has gotten us to where we are today — defeated before we ever get started. Our negative thinking was put in our heads by people who thought they were doing what was right, and this was how they were taught. This is why I feel sorry for them. We can learn to be organized because we can make it a game and have fun with it. We have the ability to keep changing things with our creativity so we don't get bored. We don't have to push for perfection when good enough is good enough.

I am your cheerleader. I don't want you to give up before you get started. Let's think of this in computer terms. Your operating system has been corrupted by negative thinking. All we have to do is a virus sweep of those bugs that have been causing you to not have fun. When we eliminate the bugs, we can accomplish more than we ever dreamed possible.

When I got up this morning, the words to a Ryan Shupe song were running through my head. I looked up the words to "Never Give Up" online and listened to them. This whole CD is inspiring. Please don't give up!

Never give up!

For more help getting rid of your CHAOS; check out or "Sink Reflections" published by Bantam and "Body Clutter" published by Fireside. Copyright 2007 Marla Cilley. Used by permission in this publication.