Chronicle reader Simon Agree saw a grocery store bulletin board posting for a house to share, illustrated with a large picture of a cockroach. The notice said that the prospective roommate should have "a Buddhist compassion for cockroaches." Under that was one further restriction: "No boys, duh!"

Agree says he used his neatest handwriting to add underneath, "because Buddhist compassion only goes so far."- ANYTHING NEW? Al Guthertz overheard two old veterans wearing military caps, seated by the statue in the Sonoma town square: "This is boring," said one. "Let's go back, turn on CNN and see if any new wars have started."

- PRESLEY MEETING: Mill Valley Professor of Elvisiana Marjorie Wilkinson has been wallowing in preliminary notices for the Fourth Annual International Conference on Elvis Presley, in Memphis in August. Among the lectures is "Elvis, Diana and Planetary Mourning."

- SPEAKING OF DIANA - Mohamed al-Fayed, owner of Harrods and father of the late Dodi, has paid about $4 million for Princess Diana's old school, reports the New York Post. The facility will become a center for troubled children. "I believe it to be a far more fitting tribute to her work," said Fayed, "than putting her name on tasteless souvenirs."

- NO STAMPS: "The Statue of Liberty holds the torch of freedom, not a book of food stamps," says Sen. Lauch Faircloth, R-N.C., opponent of giving food stamps to legal immigrants, in a recent edition of Newsweek.

- Leah Garchik