Today we indulge in a few "whyzits."

Whyzit the marquee for the new Trolley Square Cinemas faces Sixth East when the other Trolley Square marquees (along with those for the Flick and Trolley Corners) face Seventh East? Who uses Sixth East as a thoroughfare?Whyzit we are never told what happens to the pregnant student at the end of "Lean on Me"? And what was so bad about the state taking over the school, anyway?

Whyzit out of 500 seats or so in a movie theater, I always seem to sit in the one that's broken?

Whyzit the ice in Mann Theater drinks lumps into one big ball in the middle of the cup?

Whyzit the ushers at Cineplex Odeon Theaters wander up and down the aisles when the movie is at a crucial dramatic point?

Whyzit something goes wrong with the film every time I go to the Century Theaters?

Whyzit Ebert & Siskel don't fight as much anymore? Are they starting to like each other?

Whyzit radio-promotion screenings of new movies always start 15 minutes late? Whether or not they pelt the audience with T-shirts?

Whyzit "Tap" only had one short sequence in which the many veteran dancers in the cast had an opportunity to strut their stuff?

Whyzit so many movies look like so many other movies?

Whyzit John Candy gets so many starring roles when the films all seem to bomb?

Whyzit this column is starting to sound like Andy Rooney?

-MORE UPCOMING FILM TITLES you won't believe, but they're real - honest:

Rollerblade Warriors

My Mom's a Werewolf

Revenge of the Living Zombies

Cold Dog Soup

Kung Fu Diplomacy

Nerds of a Feather

Mutants in Paradise

Death to the Pee Wee Squad

Star Worms

Love Is a Fat Woman

Ferocious Female Freedom Fighters

The Texas Comedy Massacre

Exquisite Corpses

Spurting Blood

True Blood

Blood Red

Bad Blood

Pale Blood


-PAULINE KAEL, in her New Yorker review of "A Cry in the Dark," suggested the film might have done better business at the box office had it taken a page from the tabloids (and, more recently, tabloid television), which always come up with provocative, if screaming headlines.

Kael suggested as a more profitable title, "A Dingo Ate My Baby!"

That prompted a New York Times columnist to suggest more outrageous titles for three other recent films:

"Cocoon: The Return" - "Geezers from Space."

"Gorillas in the Mist" - "Behead Time for Bonzo."

"The Land Before Time" - "My Mother, the Reptile."

Any other suggestions for "Tabloid Titles" out there?

-QUOTE OF THE WEEK: Jamie Lee Curtis, in an interview with Bob Wisehart of Newhouse News Service about her new TV sitcom "Anything But Love," reflecting on her first film assignment:

"When I did `Halloween' I was 18 years old, I'd never done a movie and I wasn't being offered movies. I mean, this was not a time when Molly Ringwald and Ally Sheedy were around, you know? It just happened that was the kind of movie they were making for young women then."

-QUOTE OF THE WEEK II: Nigel Havers, co-star of "Farewell to the King," telling Richard Freedman, of Newhouse News Service, about making the film in the wilds of Borneo:

"One of the nice things about Borneo is they have no television. Imagine a life without TV! I live a life without `Dallas.' "

-QUOTE OF THE WEEK III: Rand Brooks, who played Charles Hamilton, Scarlett's wimpy first husband, in "Gone With the Wind," to Nina J. Easton of the L.A. Times:

"It was an asinine role. That role hurt me in some ways, it sort of typecast me after that."


1. LEAN ON ME, $5 million (first week).

2. Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, $41/2 million ($171/2 million, three weeks).

3. The 'burbs, $41/2 million ($241/2 million, three weeks).

4. Rain Man, $4 million ($122 million, 12 weeks).

5. Dream a Little Dream, $21/2 million (first week).

6. Three Fugitives, $21/2 million ($33 million, six weeks).

7. Skin Deep, $21/2 million (first week).

8. Dangerous Liaisons, $21/2 million ($181/2 million, 11 weeks).

9. Cousins, $2 million ($131/2 million, four weeks).

10. Beaches, $2 million ($411/2 million, 11 weeks).