Roy Smoot of Tulsa, Okla., is a shopping mall Santa Claus, but he never says "Ho, ho, ho," he never flirts, and he knows what to do if a frightened child wets on him.

Smoot is a graduate of the "University of Santa Claus," a nationwide how-to course sponsored by Los Angeles-based Western Temporary Services to train a select few on the finer points of playing the jolly old elf.

Santas should address children as "young fellow" or "young lady"; refer to parents as "folks"; never flirt - Santa is married; ask children what toys they want for Christmas so they won't ask for intangible items; and if a child wets, calmly lift the child and cheerfully hand it back to the parent.