DEAR ABBY: One recent Sunday morning, I went to the grocery store to do my weekly shopping. I was selecting some bananas when I noticed a small billfold lying among them.

I picked it up and looked around for the owner, but not seeing anyone, I took the billfold directly to the front desk of the store, then returned to my shopping.Soon afterward, a lady came up to the desk and asked if anyone had turned in a billfold. The clerk returned it to her, then pointed me out as the person who had found it. This woman marched over to me and said, "I need the money you took out of my billfold!"

For a moment I was too shocked to speak, then I told her I took her billfold directly to the clerk when I found it.

She said, opening the wallet for effect, "Well, I had $48 in here, and now it's gone!"

I said, "I'm sorry, but I didn't take your money!"

She gave me a dirty look and then marched off.

Abby, I was in a blind rage clear through to the meat section, then I calmed down and told myself that she was upset about losing her money and simply took it out on me.

But upon reflection, I then concluded that that was no excuse for her accusation. What do you think? - HONEST SHOPPER IN CHARLESTON, W.VA.

DEAR HONEST SHOPPER: You're right, her accusations were based on circumstantial evidence, which is all she had to go on. In all probability, someone had found her billfold containing the $48, removed the money and tossed the empty billfold among the bananas where you found it. Her anger was misdirected.

DEAR ABBY: I am the mother of a large family. I have several children and grandchildren, too. I have never interfered in any of their marriages or gone to anyone's home uninvited. I am always ready to help them out if they need me.

My oldest granddaughter is getting married in June. I'm not even sure I will be invited. But frankly, since she hasn't spoken to me in a year and a half, I really don't care to go. I have never said an unkind word to or about her, nor have I ever forgotten a birthday or Christmas. (I have never received a word of thanks.)

I can't go to her wedding and pretend to have a good time. I will go to the church, however, to witness the ceremony.

Some of my children are in agreement; others are not. Please advise me. My daughter and I have a very good relationship. - NAMELESS GRANDMOTHER

DEAR NAMELESS GRANDMOTHER: You will probably receive an invitation to the wedding, so if you want to avoid the reception and go only to the church, that's your privilege. Suit yourself. The bride will probably be too caught up in the excitement of the occasion to take notice of your presence or your absence.

CONFIDENTIAL TO "WANTS TO BE A SUCCESS": If you sincerely want to be a success - work, and work hard. The dictionary is the only place where "success" comes before "work."

By popular request, Abby shares more of her favorite prize-winning, easy-to-prepare recipes. To order, send a long, business-size, self-addressed envelope, plus check or money order for $3.95 ($4.50 in Canada) to: More Favorite Recipes by Dear Abby, P.O. Box 447, Mount Morris, IL 61054. (Postage is included.)