Parents, do you know what your kids will be watching on Saturday mornings this fall?
Probably not. But you can be sure they'll be watching.The networks have announced their fall lineups, and they're filled with "real" people. But most them will be in animated form.
Michael J. Fox. Christopher Lloyd. M.C. Hammer. Bo Jackson. Wayne Gretzky. Michael Jordan. Macauley Culkin.
One "real" person (well, sort of real) who won't be back is Pee-wee Herman. After five seasons, Pee-wee (Paul Reubens) decided not to continue "Pee-wee's Playhouse."
But there's good news along with the bad. "Little Rosey," the cartoon based on everybody's favorite role model - Roseanne Barr - has been dumped. And "The Guys Next Door" (A dreadful rip-off of New Kids) are moving - to Cancellation Land.
Here's a brief rundown on the choices this fall. And remember, we're talking about Saturday mornings - a time when "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" are the most popular show on the air.
- Hammerman: Animated version of rapper M.C. Hammer, but in this incarnation magic shoes turn a mild-mannered guy into a superhero.
At least Hammer is well-known as a crusader against drugs.
- Land of the Lost: Updated version of a live-action show from the '70s. A modern-day father and daughter find themselves living in a land populated by dinosaurs.
And I thought TV programmers lived in the Land of the Lost.
- Darkwing Duck: Sort of a superhero version of Donald, this Disney program is currently running on cable's the Disney Channel.
- The Pirates of Dark Water: A continuation of the "Dark Water" miniseries that ran on Fox a few weeks ago. Fox passed on a weekly show, so ABC picked up this continuing adventure about an epic quest set in a water world.
- Returning Shows: "Beetlejuice" (which will also show up as an afternoon show on Fox), "New Kids On the Block," "Slimer! and the Ghostbusters" and "Weekend Special."
- Back to the Future: Michael J. Fox (Marty McFly) and Christopher Lloyd (Doc Brown) will provide the voices as those characters from the movies continue their time-traveling adventures. And Lloyd will do live-action bits in character, doing various strange experiments.
Any chance to see Lloyd in action is worth it.
- Mother Goose and Grimm: Straight from the comics pages (including your very own Deseret News), Grimmy is a dog prone to dining in trash cans and drinking from toilets. He lives with Mother Goose and various other odd characters.
- Riders in the Sky: A combination of live action, animation and clay-mation, this is the story of three singing cowboys - Ranger Doug, Too Slim and Woody Paul - with a "hip '90s attitude."
- Where's Waldo?: Waldo and his dog, Woof, take viewers to the places detailed in the best-selling children's books and posters, which are full of "visual puns, slapstick humor and sight gags." There will also be several "interactive" segments that allow kids to find Waldo.
Ah. Something else besides Nintendo that your kids will be able to do better than you.
- Returning Shows: "Garfield and Friends," "Jim Henson's Muppet Babies," "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" and "CBS Storybreak."
- Chip & Pepper's Surf's Up Saturday: Canadian twins of Chip & Pepper (more famous people you've never heard of) host this mixture of "lively antics, adventure and animation" as well as cartoons like "Popeye" and "Heckle and Jeckle."
- Yo! Yogi!: Yogi and his pals return as crime-bustin' teenagers who hang out at Jellystone Mall.
I think I liked it better when Yogi was stealing picnic baskets.
- ProStars: Animated Bo Jackson, Wayne Gretzky and Michael Jordan will team up to use "their physical prowess to solve problems and right wrongs in the world."
We can only assume that the cartoon Bo will be in considerably better shape than the real Bo.
- WishKid Starring Macaulay Culkin: Nicholas McClary, the animated likeness of the kid from "Home Alone, " is an "average 9-year-old with a way-above-average knack for getting into and out of mischief." Culkin will do live-action "wraparounds" introducing the segments.
With all the money "Home Alone" has made, you knew this had to happen.
- Spacecats: From the man who created the "ALF" puppet, this show mixes animatronic puppets and animation. The "Spacecats" are a "highly advanced alien society of cats who come to Earth to fight larger-than-life villains."
I thought all cats were highly advanced and alien.
- Returning Shows: "Captain N and the Adventures of Super Mario Bros. 4," "Saved by the Bell" (which is expanding from 30 minutes to an hour), "Saturday Morning Videos" and "NBA: Inside Stuff."
- Little Shop: Based on "Little Shop of Horrors," a rapping "green gobbler" plant from outer space will battle the evil Dr. Toxic.
Imagine. The first plant hero since the Swamp Thing.
- Tazmania: That old Loony Toons character the Tazmanian Devil headlines this new half hour show, which takes place at the "wacky" Hotel Tazmania.
- Returning Shows: "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes," "Bobby's World," "Tom & Jerry Kids Show" are all back from last year's Fox schedule, as well as "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure," which CBS dropped but Fox picked up.