Published: Wednesday, Aug. 13 2014 12:00 a.m. MDT
Sexual violence and abuse against women is a major problem in all societies
including our own. Such violence occurs in all manner of venues including
marriage. Yes, women are raped in the marital relationship. When a woman says
"no" in must always mean "no." As a society we
don't take this seriously.
Only a small percentage of men rape others, but often that tiny number are
serial rapists and they will rape again and again, especially if they know the
school and police will say it is "he said/she said" "consensual"
and never give any kind of consequence. So those colleges and police that
protect and don't give any consequence for the serial rapists will have
multiple more rapes to deal with for years from the same serial rapists. Also,
remember, many men are raped too, often by other men as hazing in the locker
room for sports, clubs, bands and at frat houses, and for male victims, they are
even more reluctant to feel shame and not ask for help or go public. Often male
on male rape is excused as "boys being boys" "can't you take a
joke" hazing that involves many, many junior members of the frat, sports
team or club.
"He is from such a good family and she, well, she is from the other side of
town and her family is a non-member."There you have it, end of
How can anyone dispute this? There is no political argument against enforcing
laws, nor enacting laws to protect young woman.And, please, please,
Tea Partyer's and Constitutional Conservatives, don't play this as a
gambit to turn us further toward some sort of leftist dictatorship. It is about
protecting your daughters.
This is an important issue. We must put an end to sexual violence. Part of that
effort is better reporting systems, but that won't be enough. The vast majority of campus rapes are alcohol related. Access to alcohol on
campus must be eliminated if we are really serious about ending sexual assault.
Although it is politically incorrect, we must also encourage college students
not to get drunk at parties off campus.We cannot stop there. Far too
many campuses permit the viewing of movies and video games which depict violence
and wanton sexuality. We must cease to be surprised when young people who
immerse themselves in this sort of entertainment begin to imitate what they see.
I recently attended a class at my work where we were shown a film. The film
talked about a guy who initiated sexual relations with a woman and that
encounter was defined as rape. Why? did the woman resist .. no. Did she tell
the man she didn't want to participate .. no. So why was it defined as
rape? Because she wasn't enthusastic about what was going on, she seemed
reserved.If this is what passes as rape, we don't have a rape
problem, we have a false accusation problem. Lets be careful about what we
@cjb -- Are you sure they said it was rape? My guess is that they said it was
sexual harassment, perhaps because he was in a management position at work.
Re WonderProvo, UTNo it was defined as rape in the movie. The
person in the movie wasn't in a management position.I
don't blame you for questioning me, Its hard for me to believe and I saw
@JCS"Access to alcohol on campus must be eliminated if we are really
serious about ending sexual assault. ""Far too many campuses
permit the viewing of movies and video games which depict violence and wanton
sexuality."If it were that simple then the nations where alcohol
is frowned upon (primarily Muslim nations) and those without much in the manner
of movies or video games wouldn't have much sexual assault but they still
I question the White House's findings that 20% of women in the U.S. have
been raped. Part of my skepticism stems from the push to broaden the definition
of rape and sexual assault. When I at my son's campus dorm, I saw a number
of rape awareness posters in the halls. A few examples quoted from these
posters: "If you lie to a woman, and then have sex with her, that's
rape." "If a woman has been drinking and you have sex with her,
that's rape." "If a woman says no, and you pressure her into
saying yes, and then have sex with her, that's rape." "If you neg
a woman, and have sex with her, that's rape." ("Neg" is slang
for saying negative things that lower someone's self esteem.) One of the
"accomplishments" touted in the White House report is that they
"modernized the definition of rape" as part of their data collection
process. Expanding the definition of rape beyond its legal bounds trivializes
the problem, and is harmful to efforts to combat actual rape.
"I recently attended a class at my work where we were shown a film. The film
talked about a guy who initiated sexual relations with a woman and that
encounter was defined as rape. Why? did the woman resist .. no. Did she tell the
man she didn't want to participate .. no. So why was it defined as rape?
Because she wasn't enthusastic about what was going on, she seemed
reserved."What you are saying is that unless a women screams,
shouts, and tries to tear the eyes out of the guy, then she has said yes.Those of you who cry "false accusation" have never been a rape
situation. It happens all the time in every possible circumstance.
re marxistWhen the penalties for rape were initially established,
rape was where a man broke into a house, scared the woman to death and forced
himself upon her. That tramatized the woman for years if not for life, therefore
the penalty for doing this was severe.Now we apparently live in an
age where rape has been severely re-defined without a corresponding changing of
the penalty.If you are going to define rape this way, then there
probably isn't a man on earth who isn't guilty. Women aren't
always in the mood, [sometimes men aren't either].And yes I am
saying if the woman doesn't object, she has no business crying rape later
just because she has regrets or has changed her mind, this is not a true rape
and this has no business being called rape. Doing so demeans true rape. For a
man to be convicted of rape in these circumstances would be unfair to the man.
When you have a sexually permissive society where "everybody is doing
it" and it is portrayed in the media so explicitly, is it any surprise that
sexual assaults occur?Unless parents teach moral values to their
kids and how to say no, they may be unprepared for how to react in bad
situations. As we become a more secular and less religious society, we will
probably see more of this kind of thing happening.No one wants
anyone to have sex against their will. No one wants to be falsely accused of
rape or abuse. But is it any wonder with all the mixed messages out there, that
these kinds of things happen.How many young people engage in
activities like this because of peer pressure to "prove their manhood"
or "be popular"?
@Klarson "If a woman has been drinking and you have sex with her,
that's rape."Drunk people can't consent so yeah, it
is."If a woman says no, and you pressure her into saying yes,
and then have sex with her, that's rape."What part of
pressuring someone into having sex didn't strike you as something that is
wrong? @cjb"If you are going to define rape this way, then
there probably isn't a man on earth who isn't guilty."Is it really that difficult for you to conceive of the idea of a man having
sex only with consenting (while not using coercion in obtaining that consent)
re SchneeSalt Lake City, UTYes I do believe if a woman
doesn't want it she needs to either resist or say no. Acting non
enthusastic at most indicates she would rather not but is willing to go along.
If the woman doesn't make her objection clear .. it isn't rape.
@Schnee:"drinking" is different than "drunk." A
person can be drinking and still be able to give consent. Pressuring someone into having sex is wrong, but in most cases, it
wouldn't be rape. There can be a big difference between an
action that is inappropriate, and an action that is rape. Rape has a specific,
legal definition. Trying to expand and "modernize" the traditional,
legal definition of rape is not good for anyone, men or women.
RE: Klarsen "Rape has a specific, legal definition. Trying to expand and
"modernize" the traditional, legal definition of rape is not good for
anyone, men or women."On the contrary it can save women. If a
woman is compelled to perform a sex act which to her is repugnant that is rape.
Such is held to be so in many jurisdictions. You obviously have never had
someone near and dear to you be the subject of sexual assault (at least that you
are aware of).
There is plenty of money to be had. Divert resources from the idiotic war on
What I have yet heard is the role of parents in providing young men the
education that provides respect for women. We live in a permissive society, you
say; boys will be boys, you say; girls / women shouldn't dress
provocatively, you say; Teach young men that women are to be honored and
respected - this is the cause of sexual assault, because sexual assault is more
about power and control than it is about sex.
And this education of young men is more effective when it comes from a man,
particularly the father figure in his daily relationship with mothers,
daughters, peers, proving that REAL men respect women.
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