I'm bothered by the premise of the show. This is the sort of thing people
think of marriage now, and they're cheating themselves, their families,
their communities, and increasingly their states and nations through it.
"We warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals,
communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern
prophets." (The Family: A Proclamation to the World.) When I first heard
that in 1995, I couldn't wrap my head around what the First Presidency was
trying to warn us about. This TV show is just one more evidence of the
direction we are headed. What to do? "We call upon responsible
citizens...everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and
strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society."
Hey, we always see positive articles here about some local or another on a
reality show. Yet, as shown in this case, it is the worst that tv can offer, and
there is no low to which it cannot stoop.
@ RanchHand"Blame it on "the gays"; everyone else
does."Really? There needs to be some clarification on that
because the word "everyone" has a very broad meaning.Just
many are not for Gay Marriage does not mean they are blaming all martial
problems upon them."No other success can compensate for failure
in the home."I will concur with the author in stating that many
are making a mockery of marriage. I think it is probably to lessen the guilt,
pain, etc. that they feel themselves at being failures at it.If
Marriage continues to be defined as just another relationship then what does
that mean? It means that families are going to disintegrate faster and be more
susceptible to falling apart.
Just think how this show harm all of the people that are currently married or
ever will be married...I know, right?
This is not a sign that society is on the decline.This is not a
mockery of the institution of marriage.This is not evidence of
"the disintegration of the family".And the sky is not
falling.It is "entertainment". If you or society are
affected negatively by this silly little show, then you have deeper problems.
Just a modern example of one form of "Traditional Marriage" - the
arranged marriage. It's been going on since before the start of recorded
history. In the Bible, the most notable example is the marriage of Isaac and
Rebekah.Arranged marriages are still occurring in societies around
the world. Love wasn't truly considered a basis when forming a marriage
until the Victorian era.
Good article. I saw the first episode, and while it's entertaining,
it's the four-week trial that just isn't right. If they actually
committed to be married indefinitely, then it wouldn't be a big deal, but
then that would decrease the entertainment value, so that's how they do it.
praxis -Except that arranged marriages in other cultures are not for
4 weeks. They are for life, and often involved political alliances.I M LDS 2 - There is not going to be one "smoking gun"
that points to the disintrgration of the family. It is a death by 1000 cuts.
That is what our Prophets have been warning us about for years....
I understand the author's concerns regarding this new "trial
marriage" show, but I cannot understand how she decries this show and still
support The Bachelor. In The Bachelor, we are presented with a man who is
seriously dating and even sleeping with several women at the same time, any one
of whom he may propose to within a few weeks time. In the "trial
marriage" show, at least the couple is married when they sleep together, at
least they are trying things one-on-one rather than in a serial-dating/marriage
situation, and at least there is an even power arrangement rather than 25:1
dynamics. Even if the couple ends up divorcing after 4 weeks, I can't see
how that experience is worse, or more demeaning of marriage, than what is
presented in The Bachelor.
I agree this is not a mockery of marriage.This is a reflection of
today's attitude towards marriage, or at least the attitude that some
people want to portray. What will be most telling is the attitude of the people
on the show, and what the "experts" have set up.Are the
couples featured the type of people that are going to do everything they can to
make the marriage work, even though they didn't meet their spouse until
they were at the alter? Or, is this yet another reality show where the
producers put people together that they hope will fight, and boost ratings?My hope is that they have found people that want to be married and are
willing to work at forming a happy marriage.
Take this same show, remove the 4-week timeframe to decide about staying
married, require a minimum of 4 months before they can consider divorce, and
then have the film crews follow up regularly with each couple until the first
anniversary or when they get divorced (whichever comes first). Then you might
come up with something worth watching.By the end of four weeks the
bride and groom may still be wrapping their mind around the fact that they are
The modern entertainment industry has an open and stated agenda of promoting
substance abuse and wanton sexuality. Part of this agenda includes an attempt
to destroy traditional marriage and family. Modern Hollywood
portrays marriage as a burdensome institution to be scorned and ridiculed.
Indeed, Hollywood treats marriage as something to be avoided at all costs. Unfortunately, an impressionable public has begun to imitate what is
shown on television and movies. As a result, the rates of illegitimacy and
disease are skyrocketing.The irrefutable fact is that wanton,
uncontrolled sexuality does have harmful effects for both the individual and
society. Shame on those who seek to impose this harm.
It might be somewhat less irrational (though less "shocking") for it to
be an instant engagement and then decide 4 weeks later, but really, who marries
a man/woman they just met?
@ Frozen FractalsThey don't have wedding chapels in Vegas for
I think its a great idea~~ !! Its better than spending five years in a singles
ward with a bunch of guys who pretend they want to get married but really
don't.. At least the guys on this program are willing to give marriage a
The idea that this silly show merits an article on the DN is troubling.Even more troubling are sentiments like this:John Charity SpringBack Home in Davis County, UT"The modern entertainment industry has
an open and stated agenda of promoting substance abuse and wanton sexuality.
Part of this agenda includes an attempt to destroy traditional marriage and
family. Modern Hollywood portrays marriage as a burdensome institution to
be scorned and ridiculed. Indeed, Hollywood treats marriage as something to be
avoided at all costs."--- Rather than making up falsehoods about
Hollywood, why not concentrate on lowering the divorce rate in Utah? Please
quote the manifesto of the Entertainment Biz, where they swear to promote
substance abuse and wanton sexuality. Maybe they have been to the bars and
brothels just over the line from Utah?By the way, most Hollywood
studio execs are married. They may promote laughing at the sillier aspects of
married life in exaggerated sitcoms, but a lot of us find that preferable to
being over serious and humorless about the realities of life.
This is just a symptom of a much bigger problem. The sanctity and value of
marriage is disintegrating across the board, and this is one of the results of
that. Gay marriage is another, but the lack of value that heterosexual couples
place on marriage is what has gotten us to this point in the first place.
@John Charity Spring: Shame on you. Your statement about what the modern
entertainment industry openly stated is patently false. And you know it.
With more marriage minded women here in Utah than men, with more women condemned
to singles wards because dating that leads to marriage just ain't happening
and because women are held responsible for their own family creation, BRING THIS
SHOW TO UTAH!
So don't watch it. 95% of TV is a complete and utter waste of time anyway.
Actually I take that back 100% of TV is a complete and utter waste
The Bachelor is okay but this new show isn't? Can you say Confirmation
Bias. Satisfaction starting soon on USA seems much more amoral.Reality TV is nothing more that psychological featherweights w/
voyeurism issues watching other psychological featherweights whine about 3rd
rate 1st world problems.
re: I M LDS 2[It is "entertainment". If you or society are
affected negatively by this silly little show, then you have deeper problems]Agreed. It means you may be the 21st century equivalent of a Puritan.re: Surfs UpAs opposed to the girls who are looking for
their 1st husband that can provide for them like daddy does?
I think you haven't watched the show. The premise is fascinating, and the
participants definitely take the process much more seriously than the joke that
is the Bachelor. Why don't you watch the first two episodes and ten
re-write your column?
It is interesting how the author has such a problem with this show but then
doesn't mention any facts about how quickly young people in the church get
married.The people in the show have an understanding of marriage of
"death till you part".The people in the church have an
understanding that marriage is for eternity.What I always thought
was crazy was how I knew of young people at BYU-IDO getting within a
semester.I always thought that was crazy at least according to what
I understand about the eternal nature of marriage.