Comments about ‘In our opinion: Because higher education helps to enhance the stability of marriage, we should encourage both’

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Published: Friday, July 11 2014 2:07 p.m. MDT

Updated: Friday, July 11 2014 2:07 p.m. MDT

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RBB
Sandy, UT

Yes, you can say it - Dan Quail was right. While there are many single mothers who do an incredible job when the men in their life have walked out, to intentionally have children outside of marriage is simply irresponsible. While Hollywood may glamorize having children outside of marriage, the vast majority of children born in the situation will face significant disadvantages. Unfortunately, that is not what the politically correct crowd wants to hear. They would rather demand more welfare programs than even suggest that men should keep their pants zipped until they are ready to be men and take care of their children. Society should stigmatize men to get women pregnant and then move on - and the Courts should award adequate child support to give the child a reasonable chance at success.

Esquire
Springville, UT

I am not disputing your conclusions, but I have two questions. First, are you suggesting that government encourage higher education and marriage? Second, what are you doing to encourage paying for a quality higher education in Utah? Are you pushing for better funding of our schools and making tuition more affordable? That seems to me to be one way to put your money where your mouth is.

Pendergast
Salt Lake City, UT

I've heard that putting off 'pursuing family values' to pursue pretty much anything is selfish, immoral, evil.

I can't wait for JCS, redshirt, or Mike R to counter my theory then spin & justify this states alleged raison d'etre???????

2 bits
Cottonwood Heights, UT

More than higher education... MONEY (meaning a stable income, or lack of financial stress) enhances the stability of a marriage.

Higher Education is good, but that ALONE doesn't enhance stability. It enables you to get a good stable job, and THAT... enhances stability.

Any family counselor will tell you that by far the #1 reason families and marriages struggle is... financial stress. Way more frequent than infidelity or ANY other issue... it's money problems.

Higher Education is great (for your mind). But it only helps your marriage if that education translates into being able to get AND keep a good job.

People who get numerous higher education degrees in nothing that would help them get a good job... have the same financial stress that eventually ruins marriages as people who didn't get higher education.

IMO a good job is the big differentiator... not how high you went in education.

The higher education prepares you for the good job, and that's why it's critical. But higher education alone (with no job afterward)... leaves you just as exposed to the problem that breaks up more marriages than anything else (financial problems).

There You Go Again
Saint George, UT

"...higher education helps to enhance the stability of marriage, we should encourage both..."

Agreed.

However...

The cognitive dissonance between what Republican news outlets promote and what Republican Presidential Candidates sell is astounding.

Politics as usual?

Ric Santorum, a Romney nemesis in 2012, told voters President Obama was a snob because he promoted higher education.

Ric Santorum has 3 academic degrees.

Yet, Ric Santorum Republican Presidential Candidate tells voters President Obama is a snob for promoting higher education.

The t-party wing of the Republican party laps-up the nonsense.

Maybe that's why the nonsense persists.

Glenn Beck is notorious for lampooning higher education.

The fact that leading Republican radio talking heads lack academic credentials is well documented.

The DN is swimming upstream when it advocates facts which leading Republicans love to lampoon.

Sad.

Esquire
Springville, UT

Wow, twice this week I find common ground with "2 bits." A good comment, with some excellent points.

2 bits
Cottonwood Heights, UT

@Pendergast,

If you want to be intellectually honest... The Church does not encourage dropping out to start a family.

They encourage both. I can give you hundreds of references where they encourage getting as much education as you can, THROUGHOUT your life.

They didn't say "dropout and start a family". Do both.

=======

IMO the reasoning is... if you put it off, you become addicted to living alone and not having to share your time and income (so a family becomes seen as a hardship and you resist or resent your loss of freedom and $$$ when you start a family). Better to start a family while you are young, humble, teachable, flexible, maybe even in college and setting your adult habits. I did it. Worked out GREAT!

I got used to living on a limited income. And I'm still very frugal today (even though I don't need to be anymore).

Those who get used to living alone as an adult... and THEN try to start a family and live frugally... frequently look back with longing for the days when they weren't married and could spend all their time and money on themselves...

cjb
Bountiful, UT

Because higher education helps increase the stability of marriage we ought to encourage it?

Not because higher learning is valuable all by itself?

1aggie
SALT LAKE CITY, UT

Another data point:

Research--the 1995 National Survey of Family Growth--found, among other things, that single women who marry and later divorce are worse off economically than single mothers who never marry.

The U.S. has high rates of child poverty and teen pregnancy compared to many/most other industrialized countries. Other industrialized countries have more generous supports for women and children in the form of subsidized childcare, subsidized housing, cash assistance etc.

Additionally, children who live in segregated areas with large pockets of poverty are less likely to climb out of poverty in adulthood.

Combating poverty:
Invest in and provide high quality affordable education.
Invest in and provide free family planning education and contraceptives to reduce the number of unplanned pregnancies.
Provide resources for high quality childcare and extra resources/support throughout the life of children growing up in poverty.

Of course, this all goes against the belief of a majority of Republicans who believe that most poor people have it easy due to govt. benefits; most people are poor due to a lack of effort. Republicans also disagree with the statement that hard work and determination are no guarantee of success.
(Pew)

JSB
Sugar City, ID

My wife has a bachelors degree but never really used it professionally because she became a full time mother to our six children. But, her education helped her to be a much better mother. Her appreciation for education and her efforts to be sure our children received a good education were so valuable to our children. My kids all have a good education and they married people with a good education. And, our grandchildren are now good students. I attribute much of that to my wife's education.

UtahBlueDevil
Durham, NC

A marriage of equals is always far superior than one where one is left feeling lessor than the other. For too many times have I seen men using their education and earning capability as a way to exert unjust influence on their spouses. I know it goes counter to some of the most popular beliefs but it is always better for a women who stays in a marriage because she wants to, not because she has few other choice.

That, and a couple that grows together stays together. Education is a great way to stabilize a marriage creating a relationship of equals rather than dependency.

Bob K
Davis, CA

All true --

And when Gay Utahns can marry again, soon, their families will be stronger.

Mormon youth born Gay will be able to keep family support, as the church accomodates more to their equality. At least one very nationally prominent Gay mormon had to leave his family and pay for his own education at Pasadena City College, but would have been BYU caliber if straight and supported by his family.

Howard Beal
Provo, UT

I understand the arguments made by 2Bits, but even if higher education didn't necessarily lead to financial success, I think those who are highly educated, might have more sophisticated thinking skills necessary to navigate through issues that might lead to divorce, meaning that education in itself is a value that often leads to deeper, critical thinking on the more important matters in life.

Bob K
Davis, CA

RBB
"Sandy, UT
Yes, you can say it - Dan Quail was right. While there are many single mothers who do an incredible job when the men in their life have walked out, to intentionally have children outside of marriage is simply irresponsible. While Hollywood may glamorize having children outside of marriage, the vast majority of children born in the situation will face significant disadvantages"

-- Yep, them little fillies who cain't get them a man should be punished by being alone and childless. Let's forget that most single mothers did not plan to conceive and raise a child alone, while we look down on those who have a wanted child they can support and love.

Somehow, there seems to be a lack of Christian Charity in that

Hutterite
American Fork, UT

What if a gay couple get a higher education and then want to get married. Do you support both?

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