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Comments about ‘Do moms need a purpose beyond motherhood?’

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Published: Saturday, April 19 2014 9:12 a.m. MDT

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Johnny Triumph
American Fork, UT

My wife is starting a program at USU aimed at a speech therapy Master's degree. With our youngest starting kindergarten this fall it's a perfect chance for her to get back to what she loves.

jeanie
orem, UT

I think the Mormon culture I grew up in does a great job of preparing women to be moms. I don't think it does as well to prepare women for what happens after our mom duties are no longer 24/7. To be clear, I differentiate between Mormon culture and LDS doctrine.

I always had some side interests seperate from motherhood, and I am convienced my kids benefitted. As they are growing and beginning to leave the nest it is so easy to feel lost, like what is my purpose now? I am grateful that our family's fairly recent circumstances necessitated in my returning to college to prepare for working in a fileld I find satisfying. I now work part time which allows me to still be there for our few remaining kids while helping me to bridge into the empty nest and still find good purpose in my life.

jrgl
CEDAR CITY, UT

'To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven' Ecclesiastes sums up a mothers life pretty well. There were times when my children took all my energy, which seemed to happen when they were very young babies and then again when they were teens. It seemed in those times that I would never have time for any of my pursuits or dreams. But now in another season of life where children don't have major needs my career and pursuits take a larger stage of life. It is a misnomer to think of women as Mother's only. We are complex. We have goals and dreams. It is good example to show children our talents and encourage them to find theirs.

photographer801
Pleasant Grove, UT

I think it is very important for mothers to find something that is just "theirs", their own interest. I look back on my years of raising 5 beautiful and wonderful children and realize that I was never prepared for the time they would all leave me. No one taught me that they would feel differently about me, that they wouldn't need me and that many times I would feel so alone. After my 20 yr. old son died of cancer I drew even closer to our remaining children. I guess I was too involved in their lives and that was not a good thing. Raising my children was the most incredible experience of my life but it will never be the same. I thank God for a husband who loves and adores me and never fails to tell me many times a day how much he loves and NEEDS me. I don't know what I would do without him! He truly is my "knight in shining armor" and we will celebrate our 51st anniversary in a few months. Thank You God for the most wonderful husband a woman could EVER have!

sshoaf
indianapolis, IN

Of course moms need more than motherhood in their lives. You are a person first. Without a balance you will just be a more stressed out mom.

I cringe when parents say are raising their girl to be a wife and mother. I'm raising my girls to be caring, responsible, well-balanced people with marketable skills so they can support themselves. If they get to be a wife and mother, those attributes will help them do that and that's a blessing. If they don't get that opportunity, they can still lead happy, fulfilled lives. When we teach that being a wife/mother is the only goal, what happens if that doesn't happen? They are often disillusioned and unhappy and have to learn what I'm teaching my daughters from the beginning. I have to be diligent to counteract the Mormon culture in my daughters' lives so that they become well-balanced individuals. And, we never teach that being a husband and father is the only goal for men.

marxist
Salt Lake City, UT

"Don’t all moms need an outlet, a chance to develop their personal interests and talents? "

For women in general there is a powerful dissonance built into our system. In capitalism only activities which produce income are considered legitimate. Everything else is a lesser activity. What, pray, can women do about that?

ipr
Spanish Fork, UT

When my children were young, I was a stay at home mom, and loved it. When my youngest started kindergarten, I started college, and I loved it intensely. I fell in love with physics and stayed in school for 11 years while getting my doctorate in the field. In the mean time my kids would bring friends home and I would tutor them in all kinds of math. I worked in the field for about 10 years, even while going through cancer treatments. Now I'm a year out, having endured a second series of chemo treatments for 48 weeks, and I am tired, and just not up to travelling any more. However, I have developed great skills in computers and the internet, and so I am quitting my job, and I am focusing on genealogy. I love my time as a full time mother, my time in school, my time working and now my time doing genealogy. My children all have college degrees and are self sufficient. May I say that our prophets have encouraged us women to get a college degree that will support us if needed. I am so grateful for that advise.

just-a-fan
Bountiful, UT

All people, women, moms, men, dads, single folks, etc need to find purpose in their lives. Why must moms always be singled out and treated like they are some sort of victims. Don't believe me, go read some of the similar articles out there that are just like this one.Personally, I find motherhood and fatherhood the two most important "jobs" a person could have in their lives. With that said, I don't think there needs to be all of this drama over what they do.

nonceleb
Salt Lake City, UT

Yes they do, like real positions of power in their church and its saving rituals. Saying motherhood is enough actually diminishes the importance of fatherhood, as men also have those powers and positions. Is fatherhood less important, so they need more?

Lasvegaspam
Henderson, NV

Marxist: In capitalism it is not "income" that is legitimate, it is "producers". Dare I say that without mothers "producing" children, the concept of capitalism would be unnecessary.

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