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Comments about ‘Adolescent addiction: When pornography strikes early’

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Published: Wednesday, Jan. 1 2014 4:00 a.m. MST

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thoughtful dude
Springville, UT

"The Caravan Move On":

In many of the violent pornographic movies that I've seen online, they have the women talk about how they enjoyed the physical abuse. It also shows the women smiling and laughing. It makes you believe that they enjoyed the abuse.

Mamamama
Salt lake city, UT

To Bandersen. Prayer in schools won't help with the porno problem! Most of the perverts I have encountered in my 60 years were hiding behind their religion. Born agains, LDS, etc. it is so much more complicated than just prayer. Many kids can't talk to their parents about the real issues in their lives.

one old man
Ogden, UT

At least one of the commentors here today is a staunch conservative who is opposing regulation for the same tired old reason -- it's a matter of personal freedom. They claim that personal freedom overrides any attempt to regulate "speech" or guns or whatever. Then they have the gall to turn around and try to pin the blame on those blasted "liberals."

You are correct, the Republicans who have stopped passage of laws regarding porn are those who bill themselves as "libertarians." Rand Paul and his father come to mind immediately.

As for media being owned by "liberals," that's nonsense. Who owns the Fox network -- one of the purveyors of some of the sleaziest programs on the air? Is Rupert Murdoch a liberal? Is General Electric? What about Bonneville Communications?

Here's a challenge. Go to work and so some homework. If someone else tries to point out the truth and you don't like it, it's too easy to simply dismiss it. But if you have made the effort to find out for yourself, it's much harder to be dismissive.

Lilalips
Attleboro, MA

We found some fabulous internet filter programs that can calculate how many times these sites are being attempted to be accessed by different devices. We took away some of the devices and had a long talk with our youth. The software filters extremely well but we can't control anything outside our own home.

Having a close and loving relationship with your teen children is paramount to dealing well with these issues. We also have taken advantage of the Addiction Recovery Program of the Church…for one older child it was very successful. Addiction recovery should be taught as a Sunday School class….for ALL. We saw this same problem with elderly people in one area. Porn is addictive regardless of age.

one old man
Ogden, UT

Every once in awhile, we see a post here that had to have taken great courage to write -- much less to actually post.

There have been at least two above in which writers confessed their own struggles with porn addiction.

My hat is certainly off to the people who had the guts to post what they did.

ipr
Spanish Fork, UT

@Open Minded Mormon. I am Dutch. Years ago, when my children were young, we were visiting my parents in the Netherlands. The kids were around 10 years of age and fluent in Dutch. One afternoon they were watching a children's program. During one of the commercials a show, that would be shown that evening, was highlighted. It was a documentary about "a day in the life of a prostitute," and it included full frontal nudity. That was in the late 80's. I disagree with your statement that, because Europe is socialistic, they have a better control over pornography and children. The shows now are even more vulgar and you constantly have to be on your guard about what to watch. I personally think that overall pornography in Europe is worse than here. And I hope that when you visit any of its countries you will never suffer from jet lag, because if you turn on the tv you get to watch it for free.

charlyk
salt lake city, UT

#1 I find it interesting that many people on here suggest simply making pornography illegal to put on the internet. It would be a good solution, but there is simply no way to enforce it. At what point do we draw the line? Do we ban all sites with women in bikinis? National Geographic photos which show nudity? There is no way to draw a line which can make all people happy. Additionally, laws made in America would have no influence on the practices of the rest of the world and there is certainly pornography being made elsewhere. And the porn studios in the states would likely just route their videos through foreign servers and not be limited at all. Even if they didn't, new sites can be put up very quickly, and with the vastness of the internet there is no way the government could keep up having to slog through red tape to get the site shut down.

charlyk
salt lake city, UT

#2 Parents need to communicate, install filters, and be active in their children's lives. I think parents also need to not be condemning of their children and express that if there is this problem there will not be anger or punishment or, I know many will disagree, religion bandied about. When someone is told they need to stop because they are sinning, it increases the guilt and a child is less likely to be willing to admit things to their parents.

Also I think there needs to be some distinction. Churches condemn pornography but they tend to paint with a broad brush saying that any image you ever see will be forever with you, and that if you ever view pornography you are an addict. This is not true. Pornography is addictive, but not every person who views it is an addict. Children may see pornography, it will intrigue them, but they are not necessarily addicted. They should be told of the dangers and not labeled with something that probably doesn't apply to them that they will find hurtful.

Born that Way
Layton, UT

One of the problem areas is, as was mentioned, that once teens reach young adulthood, a majority have become convinced not only that there's nothing wrong with pornography, but that it is a healthy activity. So a lot of video channels and joke sites become infested with an assortment of favorite childhood trends, toys, and icons that are sexualized with a flash of pornography. Seen as funny, often legitimate humor is mixed into these sites to give them a sense of legitimacy. It's all in good fun, right?

Unfortunately the consequences of viewing this material, especially on young minds who have not the cognitive skills to simply "Stop it" (as one commenter suggests we should all just do) can be catastrophic and robs a child of a normal healthy adult relationship in the future.

So for free information and conveniences that come on the internet, we're sacrificing our children and grandchildren to these perverse robbers of natural human intimacy. Some of the most sacred and special relationships a human can experience are at risk, but we'd rather keep our datalines open for fear we might miss out on some indeterminant datum?

JeffM
Bountiful, UT

We all agree that pornography is extremely damaging; however I still maintain that we should NOT enact laws to BAN pornography on the internet. Allow me to Explain:

If a law were enacted to ban internet pornography at its source; government would need access to ISPs (Internet Service Providers). [This is equivalent to giving government control to newspaper distributors.] If government has the ability to Censor, more than initially intended is censored. We can all agree this happens time and time again throughout history.

One could argue that anything with pornographic content/reference should be outlawed; however who is defining "Pornography?"
- Perhaps any images showing a shirt off? There goes thousands of paintings of Christ on the Cross..

- Perhaps anything showing nudity below the waistline? Goodbye Michelangelo's David.. Goodbye the millions of articles on reproductive health...

As such, no simple answer exists. However, f I could offer a solution; I'd recommend petitioning to your local ISP (Comcast, Utopia, Quest, etc) asking them to offer a service that blacklists known sites associated with pornographic material. (Lists already exist and are regularly updated.)

That way, legislation isn't favoring censorship and we'd have access to all information. Pornography included.

JeffM
Bountiful, UT

We all agree that pornography is extremely damaging; however I still maintain that we should NOT enact laws to BAN pornography on the internet. Allow me to Explain:

If a law were enacted to ban internet pornography at its source; government would need access to ISPs (Internet Service Providers). [This is equivalent to giving government control to newspaper distributors.] IF government has the ability to Censor, they censor more than initially intended.. We can all agree this happens time and time again throughout history.

One could argue that anything with pornographic content/reference should be outlawed; however who is defining "Pornography?"
- Perhaps any images showing a shirt off? There goes thousands of paintings of Christ on the Cross..

- Perhaps anything showing nudity below the waistline? Goodbye Michelangelo's David.. Goodbye the millions of articles on reproductive health...

As such, no simple answer exists. However, f I could offer a solution; I'd recommend petitioning to your local ISP (Comcast, Utopia, Quest, etc) asking them to offer a service that blacklists known sites associated with pornographic material. (Lists already exist and are regularly updated.)

That way, legislation isn't favoring censorship and we'd have access to all information. Pornography included.

manuretruck
St. George, UT

Here's a simple solution. How about parents keep a tighter control over their children's internet use? It's not a porn-slingers job to babysit your children and protect them from bad information, nor is it the ISP's job, nor is it the government's job.

Regulating your child's internet use is not that difficult. I've been doing it and helping other parents learn how to do it for a decade now. It's not difficult if more parents would be willing to just educate themselves and were willing to spend the time and effort to make sure their children don't get caught up in such things. Internet access doesn't have to be unregulated. Phone access doesn't have to be unregulated. Texting, email, social media, all of that doesn't have to be a free-for-all for your kids. All of that is the job of parents to regulate and moderate for their children, and it is the job of parents to disable and take it away if the child is not able to behave with them.

IDC
Boise, ID

Why can't we follow England and put all porn under xxx and make people opt in if they want it? Whoever wants it will have easy access and those who don't won't have it shoved in their faces.

Fahrvergnugen
Provo, UT

@patriot

Your comment shows that you haven't done much research on the topic. Take some time and look up Patrick Carnes, Donald Hilton, and people like them. Studies they've done show that people who have recovered from both hard drug addictions and sexual/pornography addictions found it much harder to overcome the latter. More and more research that's being done is showing that sexual addiction affects more parts of the brain than "chemical" addictions.

"Just stopping" or making it a matter of will power isn't enough. There are natural chemicals in your body that are manipulated to the point that you become chemically bonded to the addiction, and it's much harder to escape those chemicals when they there's no way to get them out of your system. The fight is more to get them to healthy levels, and it's not easy.

And there is no simple solution. I was first introduced at age 9 by a friend. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. We didn't even have internet in the home until years and years later.

jeanie
orem, UT

Manuretruck,

Your suggestions presuppose that kids get to porn only through the devices their parent can regulate. This is extremely uninformed.

Four things need to be done to protect children, especially those who have the disposition to become hooked.

1. Parents need to be willing to talk about sex in a way that makes it safe for their children to approach them, with any question. They need to articulate to their children the difference between demonstrating love and selfishly indulging in lust.

2. Filters and monitoring need to be in place on all devices possible, including - and especially- cell phones. These need to be checked regularly. Be careful of magazines that come into your home that have provocative pictures. Even lotion ads that show the female form can be problematic for young boys.

3. Your internet rules need to apply even at friend's homes. Friends parents need to know your rules.

4. Go ahead and label me a prude, but our permissive society needs to be beaten back. This includes supporting laws that push porn back into the dark corner that it crawled out of.

With all these things in place our kids have a much better chance of avoiding this devastating addiction.

Million
Bluffdale, UT

Jesus said that the poor will always be with us and we can help them when we want. The same is true about drug and alcohol addiction and pornography addiction. You are always going to have addicts in society. Give them the help they need but don't think it is a universal problem that needs to be solved for everyone. They are addicts - it is not an epidemic just like poverty isn't an epidemic - it is choices, bad choices made by addicts (poverty addicts for the most part don't have will power to move forward). I don't have a propensity for alcohol or pornography but have taken alcohol and viewed pornography just like a lot of people and haven't suffered any ill effects because it was in moderation.

Capsaicin
Salt Lake City, UT

The solution is forcing ISP's to filter content. Why ISP's? Because 1, they possess the resources to do this. 2 it stops the smut before it ever gets to the home.
Routers are almost worthless in their ability to block sites. They have it, but its too easy to disable, or delete the list. Theres also the problem of coming up with the block list in the first place. Cheap routers don't even support whitelisting domains. Which is really what you should do with kids. Whitelisting is allowing only the domains you approve of for them to go do. Then there's the problem with 3g/lte access. How do you limit that? Software on individual computers doesn't work. In-browser plugins do not work. It needs to stop at the ISP.
It's really simple to implement. The ISP compiles an ever growing list of porn search terms. It skims the top 1000 links off of the search results. It does this daily compiling a list of the most popular porn domains. These domains are blocked. Crowdsouring a whitelist will help eliminate false positives. It has to be a community effort. Sign me up.

Allen
Salt Lake valley, UT

For those who want filtering, OpenDNS.com is a good starting place. It's free and has good categories of sites to block. Every computer which accesses the Internet uses DNS. I have it on my own computer, which has a direct connection to the Internet, and on my WIFI for visitors to my home. Filtering isn't a cure-all, but it is a necessary starting point.

The Internet is like every city -- there are places that we shouldn't visit. Teach ourselves and our children to not go to those places.

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