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Comments about ‘10 compliments your husband needs to hear’

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Published: Tuesday, Oct. 29 2013 7:00 a.m. MDT

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SignsoftheTimes
Apo, AE

Sorry, but the truth is we're here to be sperm donors and to provide for our families only. We're an ATM to which everyone who taps into it thinks there is an endless limit. We work our tails off in sorry jobs while everyone else gets what they want--the comfortable home for the wife and great schools and friends for the kids.

Shimlau
SAINT GEORGE, UT

SOTT: you seem to be caught in the latest portrayal of fatherhood, at least what the current popular media shows. And in that I may have to agree with you. However, if the mothers in this society would follow even a portion of the advice given in this article, then 50% of the marriages wouldn't be ending in divorce. We always hear that women (wives) need validation, what's wrong with men (husbands) also getting a little validation, especially from the individual that means more in their lives than anyone else.

wiseacre
Salt Lake City, UT

@signsofthetimes

I completely agree with you. Men/Husbands/Fathers have no other meaning. We're downtrodden only to be expected to fulfill others expectations. Not always as the saying goes "happy wife, happy life", more like "happy wife, still crappy life".

Ronnie W.
Layton, UT

@wisseacre, Shimlau, SignoftheTimes:

What a bunch malarkey! I honestly feel if you have those feelings about life in general you will project that emotion to your wife. The "I work my tail off so you can stay home all day" mentality is not only dangerous, it's usually wrong! If husbands/fathers were worthy of the compliments given in the article, then 50% of marriages wouldn't end in divorce. Take pride in being a provider. It's a choice you made. Own up to it. Be proud of it. And show your family you are happy to take that role.

andyjaggy
American Fork, UT

Wow, this must be the mandatory father article that KSL and the DN feel obligated to publish every 6 months. What are we at a 40:1 ratio for articles saying women and moms are awesome vs men and dads are awesome?

2020
Herriman, UT

I would absolutely love to hear compliments such as these from my wife, even just occasionally. Sometimes I wonder if she even has any positive thoughts such as these about me. Everything is usually more about what is wrong, or what I have done wrong, or didn't do at all. Rarely does she do or say something to make me feel like, as her husband, I actually mean something special to her.

azresident
Mesa, AZ

Wow, we're hearing from the men this a.m. I'm guessing the women will get to this article after breakfast is made and the kids are fed, school lunches are made, the kids are dressed and off to school, the dog/cat/horses have been fed, the dishes are done, the beds/bedrooms are made up, the laundry is started, and, and, and???

suzyk#1
Mount Pleasant, UT

To: Herriman, UT - It made me sad to read your words. It is as important for a man to know he is appreciated by words and action as a woman. Women young and old who are especially Mothers and who work just get caught up in all they need to do and I believe the majority of women are not meaning to be unappreciative or ungrateful but should stop and think how they would feel if they never felt appreciated or loved. Gosh, I hope something will change within your family and your wife and children will wake up and let you know how much they love you and appreciate all your hard work and not just do it once...but over and over again. We all deserve to know without doubt we are valuable and special within our family. That should never be forgotten or taken for granted. Hope things get better.

Fly Fisherman
Salt Lake City, UT

@2020

"I would absolutely love to hear compliments such as these from my wife, even just occasionally."
-----------------

So sorry to hear that.

But I know exactly how you feel - I have the same problem. My wife doesn't work. My wife spends the day shopping, hanging out with friends, shopping, browsing the internet, shopping, eating out for lunch, shopping, spending our money, shopping, doing hobbies, shopping etc. She has the ideal life, and has all the freedom and independence a person can have. I work stressful hours but make a decent income - sometimes with some overtime. And yet, she hasn't given me a compliment or an intimate moment in years. She won't even sleep with me anymore - making me sleep downstairs. I am so sad. I try to communicate with her and even tell her how I deserve a bit more attention, etc. but she just ignores me. You know, being active in the LDS Church we hear 99% of the time that the men are not being good husbands, etc - rarely are the wives spoken to. I might point out this article to her, but I know what she will do: she will just ignore it.

jeanie
orem, UT

I am so sorry for these husbands that feel that they are taken for granted by the women who should appreciate them the most. Men have feelings too, but are not as likely to express them as women.

Azresident - If you are married, I hope you follow the advise of this writer. We women have our time in the sun. It is right we give the men their chance unfettered - without a Brian Regan "you, ME" moment.

toosmartforyou
Farmington, UT

Luckily my wife does not subscribe to the common practice of "What my husband earns is 'ours' and what I earn is 'mine.'" Being yoked together, as close as possible to "equal" is a good thing, although on any given day one likely works or pulls harder than the other. But the question is, how do they do as a team? Apparently, not too well in some instances. Fortunately there's always the opportunity to improve, mend and/or repair relationships if both are willing.

Max
Charlotte, NC

LOL! I knew this was written by a woman the instant I started reading the compliments. Most guys really don't care about this. Women on the other hand...

rlsintx
Plano, TX

I'm divorced for 10 years now. I raised our son and got him on an LDS mission and into college alone. It meant a lot to have people walk up and compliment me on the good job I was doing. If you see single dads out there pulling that load, do the same - they need the encouragement because otherwise most of what they hear will be misandry at best.

Yorkshire
City, Ut

Sad to hear some of these comments.

Can say from personal experience that words can make or break.

Soft hearts and kindness and expressing genuine gratitude to each other can get you over some pretty deep chuck holes in a marriage.

bdckpakccd
Plano, TX

After reading the comments from the men, I know I can do better. I truly do feel these things, but don't say them enough. I don't even remember what I've said to my husband in the last few days. Thanks for this article. I'm going to do better TODAY.

MrsH
Altamont, UT

I had to laugh about the "bat your eyes and compliment him on being superman" one. But then I remember how my Dad, who is almost 80 years old, gets such a kick when my Mom hands him a bottle to open, and she remarks how strong his hands still are. He just beams!

I think there is something to this article. Everyone needs to feel important.

As for some of the commenters, it's not a competition between men and women you know...

AndrewP
Sandy, UT

I am so very grateful that I found a wonderful wife who even after 31 years still pays me all these compliments and more...every day!

I'm also grateful to see and hear my daughter-in-law doing the same for my son.

Wally West
SLC, UT

The 1st four posts have an element of truth rather sarcastically IMO.

Then, I always thought Married w/ Children was far more accurate than the Cosby Show.

jarka-rus
Layton, Utah

Dont' get much of that list in my marriage either I must say, sad to see I'm not the only one in that boat.

Iron Rod
Salt Lake City, UT

Read about the article in the Tribune today.

I'm sorry to say people do not talk or compliment each other in our fast paced society.

This applies to both husbands and wives and children.

Am I wrong?

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