This is so true. I work at a bank in a grocery store and there are children
screaming probably 4-5 times a day. Im not a parent myself, but i dont like
when people judge when they dont know what they are talking about. My parents
were great, not perfect but almost. Anyways, im sure i was a brat as a child
and i probably threw my fair share of fits. That was because I was a child and
i didn't know any better. Hopefully people can be more understanding and
realize that being a parent could be one the hardest things in the world to do.
keep on rocking parents!
People that make snarky comments about children in the grocery store seem to
have forgotten that they WERE one of the kids thrashing around on the floor
screaming because mom wouldn't buy Captain Crunch. Instead of a
critiquing and judging a poor mom with three kids in the grocery store, how
about you go over and ask if she needs any help?
Wow! This was very well-written indeed and made good points. I don't
think I have heard this host's talk show before but I think one day soon
I'll look for it.Though many parents don't control their
children well, this woman was not apparently one of those, or even close.Children crying in Church happens; you only expect the fussing child to
be removed in reasonable time autilizing the cry room not to cause a problem for
others, but a supermarket is a different proposition. Someone has to get the
groceries, has to take the children with her, and has to doggedly pursue that
course until the task is done. Good point about the "minefield" of
packages, the sugary cereal etc intended to tempt children and leading to
raucous importunities in the tried and tested way.This was not,
apparently, one of those mothers who worship their children, you know one of
those who, when a baby burps, exclaims "Oh the Wisdom of a little
child!"; this was a pragmatic, controlled and responsible person by all
accounts, acting without panic or anger through what would be for some, a near
I don't appreciate this gentleman's tone. He destroys his credibility
by speaking as if he has all the answers with regards to handling children and
parenting. Maybe he should listen to his own advice and mind his own business.
It would serve him well. Maybe people would take his lectures more seriously.
One other idea about this. You know those "older" people with selective
memories that had children who never cried in church? They all tend to be men.
The men of that generation were not very involved with the real raising of their
children, and would never deal with them when they were crying. Ask some of the
older ladies you know if their children cried in church way back then, and they
will give you the truth. They remember the crying because they were the ones
who had to deal with it each week
"Grocery stores are designed to send children into crying fits." This
is an excellent observation. A vast room designed to entice; that toddlers are
enticed is an example of the law of unintended consequence. A great article.
Excellent observations. I have a lot of friends who have nothing
nice to say about parents today. I do think there's a generational
detatchment too. They are especially vociferous about the very
appearance of children in public theatres, restaurants and their local hang
outs.Fwiw, Utah is probably one of the most kid-friendly (or
kid-tolerant) states in the nation. In my prior state (Washington) there were
more adult pet owners than families with children, and everyone thought they
knew the best way to parent. Congrats on recognizing a mother with
character and a kid attempting to exploit public sympathy to manipulate his
Does one really know the situation when a kid is unruly in public? What if they
had special needs? Either way, a person should just be grateful and move on.
There are so many other things in this world to worry about.
Man alive...now this is an article! Perfectly written, brilliantly explained.
Great example of how 2 people can experience the exact same incident, but based
on their attitude, can see and learn 2 completely different things.
This article is great! And good for that mom. She's doing the hard work now
so she can enjoy that kid when he gets older and doesn't have an
"it's all about me" perspective on life. Parents of
autistic kids, who are older and from all appearances look normal, often get
comments and looks when their kid has a meltdown in the store. It makes a
difficult job harder when a parent feels judged by strangers. On a
side note, as a young mom struggling with little kids and sleep depravation I
didn't really like the well-intentioned admonishments from older women of
"these years go fast, enjoy them while they are little." I really was
doing my best but a reglar nap for me would have made it more apparent. :)
@Brother Benjamin Franklin - Actually, if you'd re-read the end of the
article he plainly states that he DOESN'T have all the answers to handling
children and parenting... He's just tired of people who don't have
kids, or people whose kids were raised under different circumstances should
refrain from offering advice on subjects of which they have no experience.
I have a toddler grandson that we took grocery shopping. My wife was around the
corner and I had him in the grocery cart seat. As we approached the end of the
aisle he saw something he wanted, reach out for it, and was told "no,
we're not buying that." So the tantrum started. I stopped pushing the
cart, looked at him and in a normal voice said, "That doesn't work with
me" and started pushing the cart right on past what he wanted. He looked
startled and stopped crying. He never did it again the rest of the time we were
in the store.When my children would misbehave in church I would take
them out into the foyer. There was always a mom or two out there and another
dad. The two dads made their children sit still and be quiet and let them know
their behavior was not acceptable. The moms would let the little tykes run
around and laugh and play and scream and somehow they never were ready to go
back into the meeting.Children need parents, not a friend, who will
take care of the situation. Strangers should butt out, not judge.
Mr. Walsh, you've hit it right on the head here. I about lost soda out my
nose when I read Mr. Franklin's comment, he was a perfect example of what
you were explaining. As a father of 5, oneof which is special needs, I
have experienced all of which you have covered and more. I have nodelusion of my own behavior as a child, too many older people from church have
shared many stories with me. As my kids grow up and move out I try to help out
other parents as they face these challenges. Thanks again for reminding us of
the past, so that any of us with selective memory can correct our attitude and
I was once an intolerant, pathetic soul. No clue why I had no problems with my
first three children but number four and five let me live with the kind of
children I thought that only 'others' had. What a wake up call! Now
I either cringe and feel pity or ask how I can help. (Depends on the
situation.) What AMAZING people our children often turn out to be if we give
them our best effort, they will be the leaders and caretakers of the future!
As the oldest of 7 kids, I always smiled at those who said, "When I have
kids, mine will never do 'such and such'." It was amusing because
I knew differently--all kids melt down, etc. at some point, and as the mother of
an autistic child (and several more "normal" ones), I've dealt with
"SUCH AND SUCH!!!" at rather inopportune times. I've always been
grateful for the patience others have displayed during such trying times. My
worst memory is of my "normal" toddler melting down during a flight back
home. Despite all my efforts to keep a pressure earache from happening
(precautionary medicine the doctor suggested, something to suck on, etc.), she
screamed the last ten minutes. Nothing I did helped. The woman turning around
and saying, "Can't you do SOMETHING?!" hurt and only made me want
to 1) hand my child over to her to work her magic on, or 2) retort with,
"No, because I like hearing her scream." Sigh. I did neither. I
simply kept trying to calm a frantic child and prayed for a miracle. Hence, I
tend to reassure other moms at such times that they are doing fine because most
Beautiful editorial! I hadn't heard of Matt Walsh before this, but this
was impressive and totally accurate.
This is great but to include one thing. There are kids that are unable to
comprehend their behavior as bad. The kids I'm talking about are the ones
with autism. Those parents are probably the most exhausted parents of all. My
hat is off to the mom in this story and for others that hang in there under
pressure. I've been there and haven't forgotten.
True parents should control their children. But reality says that you
can't completely control another human being 100% of the time (or
eventually they will rebel).Parents have to pick their battles.
You can't go ballistic every time a toddler doesn't agree to be
controlled. Maybe she decided this wasn't a battle she HAD TO win.
Maybe she decided so save some energy for when got to the checkout counter and
he wants candy.Sometimes the best way to control a tantrum is to not
react, most tantrums are intended to get a reaction, and not rewarding the
tantrum with the expected reaction is a good way of preventing it in the future.
Maybe she was trying to prevent this type of behavior in the future but not
over-reacting.Bottom line... probably not good idea to judge
somebody else and curse them out when they are probably doing their best in a
I had 5 boys, done that. Now that I am older and hearing impaired, I just turned
off my hearing aides when going places like stores, malls and banks. What's
According to the most recent Census, the average household size for the United
States is 2.58 people per household. The average household size in Utah is 3.10
people per household.Because of my qualifications of having far
exceeded these numbers, and having children who do and did NOT throw fits in
public places, I can say with authority: Parents, control your children!If I can do it, so can you!
So, if I've never had kid and never will, I'm not allowed to have an
opinion about parenting? ever? I can understand the author's
perspective, but I still disagree with the way he characterizes anyone with an
opinion that isn't a parent, as if you need to personally experience
something to have an opinion on how to do it. Some of us
non-parents, I think, fall into another category not mentioned. Those of us
that want children, but can't have them. Not sure you parents can imagine
the frustration we have when we see you parents mismanaging something we so
desperately want to be able to have. When we see parents acting with little to
no regard for their children and treating them poorly, and we should just stand
idly by and shut up -- just because we've never had them ourselves? Sorry,
but I disagree with that. I don't need to have had children to know a bad
parent when I see one.
The second I get a little upset about a child tantrum I just remind myself, it
is the child's job to throw a tantrum. He/she is only doing what they are
supposed to do. It is my job as an adult to respond to tantrums with patience,
just like the mother in the story did. Unfortunately, this is something I often
forgot when my 5 kids were young. I finally fell on a tactic that worked for
me. I used to egg them on and encourage them to keep going until they were
finished. I told them I couldn't understand them until they were done and
when they stopped for a breath told them not to quit yet. Tantrums didn't
last too long.
Here are a few strategies that I have found useful when taking my children
shopping. As noted many times above, children are human and therefore
unpredictable. I wish I could say that my children are perfectly behaved at all
times in public but I can’t. However, I think the more we, as parents,
PLAN and PREPARE for our public excursions with our children, the more
successful we might be.1. Sometimes we have a scavenger hunt or
I-Spy activity. I have battery operated buttons that I give my children. At the
entrance to each aisle, I quietly tell them what we are looking for. My kids
love spotting items and pushing their light.2. Other times we make a
list before we go shopping. My children are active participants in making the
list and checking the fridge and cupboards. They love helping Dad cross items
off the list.3. After one of my children had a meltdown in Reams two
years ago, we planned a special “shopping” Family Night full of
practice at home and singing the wonderful song “When We’re Helping
We’re Happy” was an effective reinforcement strategy.
Loved the article! I have been blessed so far with a no-tantrum child, but I am
certain this is not due to my amazing parenting skills. I grew up in a family of
eight kids. Same parents, same parenting, completely different results. Some
kids are just wired differently. Kids are tough, and we need good parents to
raise them. We were all kids once too. Help a mother out rather than cussing at
Neither was right. When my child did the same thing in a grocery store, I
abandoned the cart, pulled her outside calmly saying we were going home because
of her behavior. That night she had a bowl of cold cereal and water because we
were out of milk. Yes I could have fixed her a meal, but I was driving home a
point---we couldn't shop because you chose to throw a fit. Never had that
problem again in any store, restaurant anything and she didn't die from a
CDMKNYThe reason someone's input is not wanted is not as much because
they haven't been a parent, but because so many who are critical of parents
in tough parenting situations are being judgmental. if you feel you can judge
people as bad parents based on something like a tantrum, you are making a
superficial judgment that may or may not have any basis in reality. A parent who
has lived through a melt down from their own child is far more likely to be
empathetic, instead of deciding the parent must be bad because their child, who
comes to earth with his or her own agency, is screaming. Most parents are
mixtures of good and bad. Any time we make judgments, we do nothing to solve
problems. I hope you will be able to have children. But in the meantime, try to
imagine what you would do in parental challenges. And then try to imagine how
you would like those around you to act towards you.
Too much excuse making. A caterwauling brat in a public place is still a
caterwauling brat. And I'd bet that in most cases there's a spoiled
child and a lazy parent.
A lady behind me at Costco's check-out stand had two toddlers go ballistic
on her. Both kids began howling and this poor mom frantically tried to calm
them amidst the unfriendly looks and comments being sent her way. I grabbed her
cart, put it in front of mine and started unloading the food onto the conveyor
belt. As soon as I did this, other people realized that the solution to the
problem was to offer help rather than cast judgment. People behind her in line
jumped into action and helped me unload the cart while others offered gum to the
sobbing children. One man helped put the food back in her cart and then went
with her to her car to unload the food into her trunk while the mom she got her
children into their car seats.It was a win-win for everyone. Kind
acts helped a frazzled mom and the crying kids got out of the store more
quickly. Pulling her cart ahead of mine and beginning to empty it reminded
people it was OK to be kind, and offering help was a viable option to the
This article shouldn't be on the Deseret News.The underlying
point of 'show more respect to others' is true. But there is nothing
good about preaching that with the sarcastic disdain shown to others in this
article.My Father had children back then and if his kids were
screaming in sacrament, he took them out to show respect to others. In a perfect
world, everyone would tolerate screaming children. This isn't a perfect
world. The sacrament meeting is one of reverence. I was removed many times in my
youth. This allowed others to feel that reverence. The First Presidency has
asked that children be taught to share testimony in primary, to give adults the
opportunity to. We need the sacrament, young children don't.It's true that people show disrespect, either blatant or in ignorance.
But showing them anything but kindness back is worse. If you truly have love for
your fellow man in your heart, you will labor for their welfare. Help the
mother, help the old man, or the 20 year old. That is good. An article in
retaliation helps no one.I expect more respect from this paper.
Hats off to moms and dads everywhere who do their best to raise children and
have the patience to deal with difficult children. There are a large number of
children out there with severe emotional disabilities who may not be able to
manage their tantrums or other social behaviors. We can't just lock them in
their rooms to keep them from embarrassing us in the grocery store.
From my experience as an "older person" who had 4 sons, and now has
grandchildren; it is all in how you deal with it. If you choose to ignore the
tantrum, little Johnny/Susie will conclude that if they yell louder to get your
attention, they will achieve the goal of having their way. If you deal with it,
as in telling them "it isn't going to get you anything", or that
you will not tolerate the bad behavior without consequences, you have told them
that the tantrum isn't acceptable. Take action to stop the tantrum, take
them out of the church meeting and make sure that they don't have fun in
the foyer so that it becomes a reward to be taken out. Don't dress your
toddler in play clothes for church, and then wonder why they want to play in
church. Don't let them bring the big toys, and then try to control the
play in church. Doing something to discourage the tantrum yields
long term results. Been there, done that.
One day a friend and I went to eat lunch after a hike. Since we were dirty,
sweaty and smelly, we asked to be seated on the patio even tho it was a bit
uncomfortably warm out there out of respect for others in the restaurant. While
we were eating, some kids from inside the restaurant came out and were tearing
around the patio. Their parents apparently didn't have a problem with this.
The server however, stopped them and sent them back inside saying there were
people eating and they needed to show some respect. That server got a nice tip
from us. All too often, parents seem to grow an immunity to their
children's behavior or perhaps they've given up on teaching manners.
I'm sorry, but yes, if your child is prone to tantrums, don't take
them out in public and expect everyone else just to deal with it. Respect goes
this article reminded me when i had a few single women tell me how to teach my
youngest whom was and still is determined to get attention. she was taught with
respect and discipline. i would laugh when single women told me how to let my
daughter do what she wants and do not spank her hand for grabbing an item or
don't tell her to sit down in the basket because that will lead to a
spanking. seriously really. if you are not a parent and even are a child
therapist ... until you are a parent you have no clue. please respect the parent
even if you feel they are wrong in what they are doing. yes if the child is in
danger then step in but otherwise remember the parent is usually doing the best
they can do
I have lived to regret the phrase, "my child/children will never [fill in
the blank}". While I still do not like to encounter meltdowns of children
in public I try to have empathy for the mother, and usually it is the mother who
has to deal with the little monster.I did recall one scene that
disturbed me, seriously. I was working in an appliance service center and
watched a mother tell a 5-6 year old son to stop taking tools off the shelves,
re-sorting tools in a bin but never enforcing her commands. He kept disobeying
and pleading for her to buy this or that so much she caved in and bought him a
retractable tape measure - a totally useless item for his age solely to placate
his whims. I fear the child will grow up unable to restrain his wants and will
probably run afoul of the legal system.Many children grow up without
external discipline that is molded into self discipline and our society sees
them as incomplete and incompetent adults who fail in society. Appeasement
never is the answer, ask Chamberlain.
Some parents don't know how to control their children. I think some
parenting classes would help.
Thomas, the issue I have with the article is Mr Walsh seemed to make his own
assumptions. First, his article doesn't support his headline. How does he
know the other man at the store wasn't a parent, himself? Or the older
gentleman at church? This is a headline lifted directly from his blog. He
immediately sets up an us (parents) vs them (non-parents) conflict. Secondly,
Mr. Walsh took the admittedly inappropriate words as a judgment on parenting
style. Mr Walsh says that the woman was calm and in command. From what he
writes, it was her choice to ignore the child's tantrum and ride it out.
The problem with this choice, is she non-consensually decided that everyone else
in the store had to ride it out with her. His comment wasn't so much about
her being a bad parent, but seemingly ignoring that others shared the store with
her. Lastly, any "fan" of Mr Walsh would know he's conservative and
expletives would not be appreciated. I wonder if this story actually happened as
told. We only have one side.
re: toosmartforyou this afternoon. Judgement call. You handled
things wonderfully & wish more people had your parenting skills.I could care less if little johnny does his best Tasmanian devil impersonation
just so long as he keeps quiet.
If the three year old felt he could "go ape" in the store, it must work
for him most of the time. Two and three year olds are small con men. They are
charming and conniving and everything they do is so they can get a reward. All
con men should be treated the same. They need sufficient consequences to their
behavior to make them realize certain behaviors are not tolerated. Most of the
time some time out (prison for the older ones), works well. If by three he can
act this way, he's got Momma trained to get him what he wants. Maybe he
needs the attention he'll get later. My guess is he might get scolded but
to him it is alone time with somebody.AT times a pinch or swat on the
bottom gets their attention and it is not what they expect but they will quit
the behavior. The foul mouth should have shut up though.
I have had my children and am a grandparent now but I agree with the man who was
upset at the tantrum. No, the snide remarks weren't right but so many
parents seem to just let their little ones throw tantrums without consequence. I
spanked my kids when they misbehaved and they are no worse the wear for it. We
are very close. I let them know that it was better to behave and use their words
to voice unhappiness with decisions than to allow them to act like brats and
destroy other people's peace. The worst is in restaurants when parents are
embarrassed at their children or just ignore them screaming. Take them outside.
Groceries can wait, food can wait, teaching your children cannot wait. Manners
seem to be a thing of the past even with adults. No, I am advocating beating
children but a swift smack to the backside and time in the car with you outside
can work wonders when you keep your cool and tell them this is not acceptable
behavior and you won't put up with it. Same in church, get your kids under
Burnham, you have it right. Had this woman looked like she was trying to get the
kid under control, she would have been given a pass.My parents were adept
with the phrase "I'll give you something to cry about."
Incidentally, they never struck us. Yet somehow, they still managed to make that
I enjoyed the article, but I think Mr. Walsh's comment to his listerner was
also a fail. It might have been better to say something more teaching instead
of accusing, like "Why doesn't someone offer to help?" Granted in
the heat of the moment I probably would have said the same thing, but we all
could be a little more patient and less violent in our speech with everyone.I love how some people post their experiences and tips of how they were
able to raise their children with the best results. This group of people were
not addressed in the article, which is the group of current parents who think
they are the answers with the best methods because they never have problems with
their children. Obviously, it's what they are doing, nothing to do with
the child's own personality and will.In my limited parenting
experience, I have learned these two facts:every child is different and
will receive parenting techniques and discipline differently, and you don't
know what it's like until you are doing it.
Dear Parents with kids--I don't care what YOU want in regards to your
kids in public places, but you better be treating them KIND or I will challenge
you. Example--the other day, heard crying and pleading a few isles
over. Let it go a long time before deciding to go over. Lots of times I do this
and either walk by and smile at the distressed little one, which sometimes beaks
the crying jag, or just stand right next to the parent (and pretend to be
looking at something on a shelf) if the parent is being ridiculous/and or
abusive. That usually works too, because they start seeing through my eyes what
big jerks they are being, needlessly provoking and/or tormenting a child
(thereby causing the crying)This child was asking to please go to
the bathroom. Nope said the mom. You should have gone at home before we left.
This child was clearly too young to be that far-thinking and clearly needed to
go. But she just made him suffer. Was only just this one child she had. How hard
is it to take one child to the bathroom???Be KIND, not provoking.
We sincerely love to convince our grandkids to go with us to Costco and run
wild! We feel like the shoppers at Costco are far too impatient and incredibly
rude and we feel that it is our responsibility to bring them back to reality.
One time, I had a toddler in the store around Christmas time. She was crying
really loudly. I had a gallon of milk in my hands, while holding her in my arms,
and waited in a "10 items or less" line. The woman in front of me had
many items, but turned around and faced me. She told me to shut my kid up. I
told her if I could just go ahead of her, I would gladly get out of the store.
You see, my child had a double ear infection, and we were waiting to get the Rx
filled. I needed 1 gallon of milk for my other family members. The woman was so
irritated and refused to let me go ahead. When I finally got to the cashier,
the cashier asked what happened. I explained it all to her. The sad look on her
face said it all. "I wish I would have known. I would have taken you
We have 7 kids that we raised to not throw tantrums, whether in public or
private. We all need to learn to control ourselves. They need to learn
tantrums are not part of acceptable behavior - just like violence is not
acceptable behavior. This makes parenting much more bearable, and the children
much happier. This is a fact that I can prove every day.
I had children who threw tantrums and I would quit what I was doing and stand
and watch until they were all done. Then I would ask if they were done and if
the tantrum had helped them obtain whatever it was they needed. Mostly they had
no answer but the frequency of tantrums did fall precipitously until absent. One thing I wanted to do, but did not have the nerve, was sell tickets
to the "show" while a tantrum was running its course in a public place.
I often thought those disapproving spectators actually served to lengthen the
tantrum because of the audience. "Selling" tickets might have moved them
along faster without the child-supporting facial expressions directed towards me
or my spouse. You know; those looks of disdain or disapproval that the child can
read as easily as the adult. Or it could at least have changed the facial
expressions towards the child instead of the adults so the child would have felt
the shame instead of feeling a tacit support. Of course that is an
untried/unproven theory and I am not certain it would have been smart because of
the potential psyche damage.
I always like it when someone tells me to "shut the kid up". This
"request" provides me with several entertaining minutes of contemplating
just how I could accomplish this without incurring damage to the kid. And I am
including all potential damage, mental, emotional and physical. This list has
been compiled over the years and I hope you will find it fun.1)2)3)4)5)6)It reminds me of a MASH episode on television
where a bus load of people where hiding from the enemy and a baby was crying.
People on the bus insisted that the mother "shut the kid up" so she
smothered him. Frankly that is unacceptable in our society and other forms of
"punishment" need careful and full consideration. Passers-by should go
about their business and ignore the noisy or unruly kids. Parents should be
prepared to cope.
Unbelievable!! How many posters demand that the parent "control" the
child. Seriously, what gives you the right to control another person? When one
of you "adults" has a tantrum should we all come and control you?
Somehow I don't think you'd appreciate being spanked, man-handled,
scolded, put in timeout or whatever you feel you'd do to a child to
"control" them.I'm truly stunned at most of the answers
on this thread. And to all of you who have broken your arm in congratulating
yourself at how wonderful you were as parents, if only all of society could be
as good as you.
All of the comments go to prove the author of this article correct. Parenting is
the easiest thing to have an opinion on and the hardest thing to do.I sincerely enjoyed the article and agree with his opinion. Luckily my 2 year
old is very well behaved in the grocery store, but she has thrown multiple
tantrums elsewhere. At this age reasoning with her does no good. The best
solution is to just let her finish her tantrum and calm herself down without
caving into her demands. Hopefully she will learn that the tantrum doesn't
get her what she wants. I'm sorry if this destroys the quite contemplation
and meditating you were doing on isle 11 next to the noodles.
@those commenting that they know how to raise kids even though they don't
have any, I suggest you watch "Disney's My Son Pinocchio:
Geppetto's Musical Tale" for a very wise perspective on being in
someone else's shoes.In other words, you just don't get
One child tantrum is inevitable. After that with the correct discipline there
should be no more. Spare the rod spoil the child seems to be the politically
correct stance these days, while for those who make the rules, otherwise know as
"the establishment" anyone over say 40, grew up with a completely
different set of rules. Tantrums happen, parents shouldn't be chastised by
complete strangers for it. But if you continually spare the rod and spoil the
child, tantrums will continue.
When my son was two and my daughter a few months old, my husband and I, in our
early 20s, were sitting in sacrament meeting of our BYU ward when the two year
old started getting restless and cranky as toddlers are wont to do when required
to sit for long periods. My husband tried to quiet him but he reached out and
clawed my husband across the face drawing blood, something he had never done or
had seen done before. As my husband headed for the aisle and out the door my
son screeched at the top of his voice, "Daddy, don't beat me!" (He
had a fabulous vocabulary for a two year old.) Now this child had never been
spanked or threatened in this way but if you heard how convincing he sounded you
would have believed he received daily beatings. Talk about embarrassing. And
the comments from the childless couple behind us while he was fussing, which
prompted my husband to take action and perhaps caused him stress which kids are
sensitive to, and the comments they made as he was being carried out caused me
to laugh. Just wait until they have kids, I thought.
The message of this story seems to be, 'your judgements are neither invited
not appropriate.' Yet somehow the author felt the need to imply that 1.
people without children know nothing about raising children and 2. only
childless people complain about children. Neither one is generally true. And
sometimes NOT being a parent gives you a useful objectivity parents don't
tend to have, particularly about their own kids or their own style of parenting.
So yeah, fair overall point about judgey comments, but you kind of lost me with
the unfounded assumptions.
The problem is a parent is not allowed to discipline (spank) a child in public
because they will get reported and the kid taken away. The public won't let
you discipline and some children really need it bad. Some children are easily
influenced and will listen if you take them outside to talk, but some just need
it where it counts. So the children end up ruling the world, and they know it
too. They would behave if they knew they would be punished physically, but
because that is a social taboo, what is a parent supposed to do? Ask nicely for
them not to hit/yell/scream, etc? That just won't work for any kid that has
any intelligence to find boundaries and to find his own way in the world.
Matt Walsh Rocks...
Great article/rant. If you think toddler tantrums are hard to control, try
teenagers! It simply doesn't get any easier as a parent. EVER! Any parents
who professes to have maintained perfect "control" over their children
are in for a serious wake-up call someday. Every child comes with their own
personality and special needs. Every parent gets at least one who tests their
patience and stretches them to their utter limits. No one is exempt. You learn
to "Choose your battles", pace yourself, treasure the good days, and
pray to God someday they'll have a kid of their own just like THEM so they
can finally appreciate what a cool parent you really were!