Comments about ‘Men wish women would share the cost of dating, study says’

Return to article »

Published: Wednesday, Aug. 14 2013 9:45 a.m. MDT

Comments
  • Oldest first
  • Newest first
  • Most recommended
Some1outthere
Salt Lake City, UT

I am one of those woman who got stuck in a relationship where I was paying for all our dates even though the guy made more than me. So I just started making simple homemade meals and we didn't go out on "dates" because he didn't want to pay for it. We went to parks/beaches and walked around enjoying each other's company. We eventually broke up but finances had nothing to do with it but rather religious differences did.

Shawnm750
West Jordan, UT

I'd say in the initial dating stage, who pays is dependent on who does the asking. When a woman asks me out, I go with the expectation that she's paying, but I always offer. And, I always have appreciated it when I've been the one who asked my date has offered to pay.

As a relationship progresses though, I see no reason why costs can't shared, but that's really up to the couple to decide. Part of their "establishing open and honest communication" needs to include speaking openly about finances. If one party is always suggesting costly outings, but never offering to contribute financially, then that needs to be addressed. Likewise, if one person is always footing the bill for these outings, and is struggling to do so financially, they need to speak up as well.

Aggie238
Logan, UT

When I was single, I didn't mind (and actually preferred) paying, at least early on in a relationship. I am a little old fashioned, I suppose. But at the same time, it really bothered me when women "expected" to be asked out on dates at the man's expense, but didn't bother to make themselves any more attractive as a dating partner (and I don't just mean physically). In my experience, most guys don't mind paying for dates at all, but find it quite insulting when a girl feels and/or acts like she is entitled to being treated to dates with no effort on her part or any show of appreciation.

I was lucky enough to find a woman who is very easy to treat with love and respect, in large part because she treats me with equal love and respect.

Johnny Triumph
American Fork, UT

Sounds like chivalry really is dead

ImABeliever
Provo, UT

To: Johnny Triumph, Chivalry isn't dead; it is just on a really long vacation. lol.

Vladhagen
Salt Lake City, UT

At Johnny Triump. So are suits of armor and white steeds.
I am a big believer in the person who asks being the person who pays.

My2Cents
Taylorsville, UT

When you talk of chivalry you are talking about the respect, care, and devotion to attention a man gives a woman. Chivalry is never associated with women being chivalrous towards men.

Opening doors for women a few generations ago had some social reason for it, they carried the babies and wore bulbous skirts and dresses that had to be held down in wind and going in and out of doors in cars and homes and business. Those were days when women were consider the fair and gentle who needed help (physically) man to shield them from harm and weather.

But as for dating costs, its a double edged and equally expensive process for both sexes. Women spend a lot of money on looks and preparation that most men don't consider but we expect. I think that men who expect women to pay are abusers and a bad risk for women.

And somehow 40 year olds dating to look for a mate doesn't have the same glamor as when you are teenagers or under 20 and dating. What's really sad is older relationships don't work or share or unify. Its a his and hers life.

sjc
layton, UT

That is only because so many men are boys - jobless losers living with mom & dad.

Real men pay.

Vladhagen
Salt Lake City, UT

2 cents. i will pay for any girl who wears a bulbous skirt on a date.
At least where I am from though, it would be the epitome of bad taste for a woman to ask a man on a date and not pay. I know women put on make up or what not and that costs money, but when I go out, I bathe ( water bill!), I shave (razor), I brush my teeth(paste, brush) I put on something to enhance my smell........all these things cost money for me as well. And no SJC, I am not living in my parents' house. I am a salary man with an apartment of my own. But I still expect that a girl pays sometimes.

JaimeFranco82
Guayaquil, 00

I personally think that a man who's not willing to pay for a date, is not dateable!!!

Jamescmeyer
Midwest City, USA, OK

I know this is an older article, but I just have to chime in that I absolutely do not want women I date to share the cost.

to comment

DeseretNews.com encourages a civil dialogue among its readers. We welcome your thoughtful comments.
About comments