People may say they don't have a problem with women asking but its not
likely to become the norm or much of an alternative and may get turned down
more.A woman can be ready emotionally before men are but a man not
ready emotionally is in for a very rocky ride, especially if they have been
cohabiting where secrets and secrecy are part of the relationships. Asking a
person off the street cold turkey to marry you is more likely to work than a
duet pretending to be in love living together for 7 or 8 years.Though men are sexually intrigued doesn't mean men are emotionally ready
for anything that comes. Women are on a biological clock and men seldom consider
families.Cohabitation is too much of an I and I and no we. They
don't know how to share and have many pre wedding secrets they don't
want to disclose which is stressful on a marriage. These are the friends with
benefits group who don't learn to share money and finances. The benefit
relations have too many skeletons in the closet to be as open as they should be
to become a real marriage.
Men are supposed to be more decisive and women more like the female leads in
Gone With The Wind and Far From The Madding Crowd each with three men on a
string and not always sure which to choose. I think women are often
the more decided "in real life" though and some men have a problem
"taking the plunge". It'll all work itself out I dare say.
I think the best illustration of why men do the proposing was actually shown on
'Friends' when the woman tried to propose to the man and burst out
Havent you heard of the "talk" in which the women says, we have dated
long enough, if we arent going to get married I need to move on". In this
case, the women is proposing. Sort of. As with all succcessful
marriages, the important this is good communication.
Good point. I imagine that a fair number of feminists aren't interested in
men. That is why we likely don't hear of many women proposing to men.
Maybe there isn't a need or want to get married at all. People who
don't want to get married are best off not married. It's not
mandatory. If they want to shack up, that's their business. If not,
that's fine, too.