Quantcast

Comments about ‘Letters: 'It's OK to Plan'’

Return to article »

Published: Friday, Aug. 30 2013 12:00 a.m. MDT

Comments
  • Oldest first
  • Newest first
  • Most recommended
Furry1993
Ogden, UT

Every woman, regardless whether she wants a small, medium or large family, needs to plan her pregnancies. Pregnancy puts a lot of stress on a woman -- physically and emotionally. For a woman's physical and emotional well-being, pregnancies need to be spaced at least 2-3 years apart to give her body time to recover from the last pregnancy and delivery before starting another. Any closer together than that can cause some real problems for her.

Another idea -- if she wants a large family, why not have two biological children (to replace the parents) and then adopt one or more of the many children who do not have parents. That would be a win-win decision for all involved (especially the children who would then have homes). Just a thought.

4word thinker
Murray, UT

Having a large family is an equally valid choice, but it is shunned throughout most of the US and much of the world. Perhaps we need billboards assuring its OK to have a large family. I bet Susan Soleil and the UPEC members would be up in arms at billboards promoting large families.

Perhaps everyone should MYOB and we wouldn't have some people insulting other for their choice of family size.

Mike Richards
South Jordan, Utah

Had my wife and I used someone else's idea of what kind of income we needed to raise children, we would have limited ourselves to one child. Seven of our children would not have been born. Seven lives would not have been invited to experience mortality. Seven spouses would not have married into our family. Many grandchildren would not have been born. The wonders (and sorrows) of life would have been missed.

I would have stayed in a job that provided for one child. I would never have "streched" my knowledge and abilities until I was able to provide for eight children. I would have missed out on the miracles that happen when we walk by faith.

Some of our children have large families. Some have chosen to limit their families. That is their choice. My wife and I do not meddle in the "family planning" of our children.

The billboard is just another "signs of the times" that were prophesied. God does not use billboards to remind us of covenants, instead, He sends the Holy Spirit to teach and advise, to answer those very personal questions that parents ask.

The Real Maverick
Orem, UT

Too many people don't plan.

twinfallsid
TWIN FALLS, ID

"...Utah Population and Environment Coalition talked with young people who told us they had not heard that it was OK to plan a small family."

It's all in the wording. My teenage sons have been told that family size is up to them and their future spouse, but especially take into consideration their wife's feelings since it effects her body. I just asked them is it OK to plan a small family. They shrugged their shoulders and said basically, I don't know yet, I'm not married yet. So, it's a decision they'll make with their spouse. Would that be taken as a "no" answer? Were you asking young singles? Ask young married couples.

In her use of words, the letter writer makes us believe that most of us are not smart enough (like her and her coalition) to have "gasp" planned ahead to have more than 2 children. I'm sure she means well, but when someone comes across as more enlightened then us other silly parents, it's just insulting. My children will have as many children as they think is appropriate for them.

Hutterite
American Fork, UT

It is ok to plan. And it's important to not let anyone else usurp your choices in life.

Cincinnatus
Kearns, UT

Gee Mike Richards, thanks for another sermon.

It's okay to plan. It's okay to have smaller families. Modern life is complicated and expensive. Does somehow having eight children make you better than me for having five? Or make me better than someone having two? Eight children was your choice. You claim it made you a better person. Fine. That doesn't make the rest of us inferior to you.

Even the LDS Church has stated that it's okay to plan- that it's up to the husband and wife to decided what they can handle physically, financially and emotionally. You seem to be stuck in a time from 30 or 40 years ago (or 100 years ago). Even if you don't want understand that some things are different today than when you got married and began having a family, quit sermonizing to the rest of us.

HaHaHaHa
Othello, WA

Oh oh, quiet everyone, someone in Kerns is developing an inferiority complex! Give me a break! I enjoyed the Mike "sermon", much more then I cared for the Cinncinatus sermon...but I'm sure thats not a big surprise. Funny how some are so obvious about the double standard? I also think you might want to brush up on the LDS doctrinal view of family planning. Technically you're probably not wrong, but much more to it then what your trying to claim. Don't mislead, I've never heard a prophet say, that the idea of multiply and replenish has been revoked. Kind of suggests that the issue is not just up to our own self centered feelings...there is some responsibility involved, along with person genuine faithful inspiration. Excellent comments by 4wordthinker!

LDS Liberal
Farmington, UT

@Mike Richards
South Jordan, Utah

Some of our children have large families. Some have chosen to limit their families. That is their choice. My wife and I do not meddle in the "family planning" of our children.

========

And that's all this billboard is saying.

It's none of yours or anyone else's business.

BTW - Mike,
I saw a Salt Lake Newspaper from 1863 at the Church History Library Wednesday.

Top Headline banner --

Brigham Young said - and I quote - the Mormon Motto is:
"Mind your own business"

Cincinnatus
Kearns, UT

@HaHaHaHa

Your screen name reflects what your comments made me do.

I'm just an individual who grows tired of certain people declaring that their personal and religious philosophy is best for everyone and gives Sunday sermons about it here on the comment boards.

"Technically you're probably not wrong, but much more to it then what your trying to claim. Don't mislead, I've never heard a prophet say, that the idea of multiply and replenish has been revoked."

I never stated that any prophet of the LDS Church stated that that commandment was revoked. But, from the Church's own website:

"When husband and wife are physically able, they have the privilege and responsibility to bring children into the world and to nurture them. The decision of how many children to have and when to have them is a private matter for the husband and wife."

So, "technically" I'm not wrong- but then you decided to put words in my mouth and accused me of misleading. That reflects more on you than me. But, what do I know- I'm just from Kearns and apparently have an inferiority complex.

LDS Liberal
Farmington, UT

@Cincinnatus
Kearns, UT

LDS church website:
"The decision of how many children to have and when to have them is a private matter for the husband and wife."

=======

Thank you. - I tried 4 times a few days ago, but was "denied".?

Meanwhile – I was attacked for supporting the LDS Brethren, not once, but twice – and NEVER said ZERO pollution or "Don't have children..." another half-baked, twisted lie.

proof:

Kora
Cedar Hills, UT

LDS liberal- What you are saying is that you are LDS, but oppose the LDS Church when it has advocated for large families, and actually think the leaders have been wrong in this area. That doesn't add up to me.
• 4:28 p.m. Aug. 26, 2013

2 bits
Cottonwood Heights, UT
LDS Liberal,
He instructed his Adam to "multiply and replenish the earth". I don't think that was a zero-growth instruction. And I don't remember him changing his mind on that.

When you say, "Don't have children"... are we encouraging what he made this earth for? Or when you say, "Don't have children"... are you fighting AGAINST his expressed purpose for this earth?

•10:18 p.m. Aug. 26, 2013

The Hammer
lehi, utah

The billboard smacks of bigotry toward one group. It was meant to grab peoples attention and get greater publicity. And what better way to do that than a-slap-a-mormon-in-the-face-campaign.

Everyone wants people to be smart about having a family but too many people don't have children because they want to play instead. Children require work and its stressful and it keeps you from going to Hawaii every year because you have to get a minivan instead of a motorcycle. This type of attitude is the problem, not peoples desire to have a large family.

As far as who this campaign should be directed to is high school students who don't abstain from sex and end up with a kid. But instead of telling kids to wait until they get married and encouraging marriage and a family they mainly just encourage sexual activity with no responsibility. It doesn't work and its obvious as I see more and more young women with out a man to support their child come into my office in the worst form of poverty.

atl134
Salt Lake City, UT

You all seem to be forgetting something... planning means things like using birth control to prevent unwanted pregnancies. You know what unwanted pregnancies often lead to? Abortions. This campaign helps reduce abortions by working to prevent the most common thing that leads to one. But you pro-lifers are too busy advocating quiverful nonsense to pay attention to it.

HaHaHaHa
Othello, WA

@ Cinncinatus

Thanks for your second sermon...love that double standard. I know your morals and standards are more important and valuable then the rest of us! I didn't even use this word in my first post, but thanks for reminding me. It is a COMMANDMENT! Doesn't mean it is something we obey when we feel like it, or if it is convenient, or self-centeredly decide on our own. It means we make these decisions with the input of divine guidance, to help us know we have kept the commandment, not just satisfied our own feelings on the matter. Yeah we all have freedom to decide to follow the commandments...or not, and I may be coming down hard on your expression, but it seems to me that "it's okay to plan- that it's up to the husband and wife" (your language), is at least a slight variation and misleading to the idea of following a commandment.

Neanderthal
Pheonix, AZ

@4word thinker:
"Having a large family is an equally valid choice, but it is shunned throughout most of the US and much of the world."

Not so. There are societies/relgions in the world that emphasize large families. Because they know that, over time, ethnicities with large families will eventually take over the world. Currently, the US families are less than replacement size. What does that tell us about the future of WASPS in the US?

"Perhaps we need billboards assuring its OK to have a large family."

That'd be a start.

RanchHand
Huntsville, UT

I just love how self-righteous some of these comments are. It just warms the cockles of my heart.

J Thompson
SPRINGVILLE, UT

Look at how many people are telling us to mind our own business, as if they had the right to tell us anything.

Those who don't have the "faith" to let our Creator send them children will still receive all the "blessings" of having no children or just one or two. We and our children are the reason that the earth was created. Children are entitled to a life. Our Creator will not forget those who willing welcomed a child or many children into their homes. If those who are willing to live by faith and are willing to listen, the Creator will help them determine how many children should be welcomed into their home and He will help them find a way to care for those children.

Implying that a billboard is significant demeans our whole purpose of living. We are alive because OUR parents had the courage to invite us into mortality. Had they not had that courage, we would not be here (to argue the point or to tell others that they have no right to speak).

riverofsun
St.George, Utah

Ah.... the pre dominant religion.
Wonder if some of the most vociferous commenters on this subject are the teachers in classes on Sunday at the Churches they attend?
Years ago, I tried the Church thing, and was frightened away by those teachers who were unable to see that not everyone, everywhere, thought their opinion was the answer to all that was wrong on the planet.

Miss Piggie
Pheonix, AZ

@LDS Liberal:
"What you are saying is that you are LDS, but oppose the LDS Church when it has advocated for large families, and actually think the leaders have been wrong in this area. That doesn't add up to me."

Three religions who advocate large families... LDS, Muslim, and Catholic. And why's that? Because that is a sure way to grow the rolls of the church. Who is currently following that advocation? Basically only the Muslims. Who will rule the world one day with that advocation? Muslims.

LDS Liberal
Farmington, UT

@Miss Piggie
Pheonix, AZ

@LDS Liberal:
"What you are saying is that you are LDS, but oppose the LDS Church when it has advocated for large families, and actually think the leaders have been wrong in this area. That doesn't add up to me."

Three religions who advocate large families... LDS, Muslim, and Catholic. Because that is a sure way to grow the rolls of the church. Who is currently following that advocation? Basically only the Muslims. Who will rule the world one day with that advocation? Muslims.
4:33 p.m. Aug. 30, 2013

=========

Huh?

Your comment is either anti-Mormon,
anti-Muslim,
or both.

The LDS Church advocates the importance of "families", period.
I don't recall anything about narrowing it down to only LARGE families.

Mormon Myth #217 - busted.

to comment

DeseretNews.com encourages a civil dialogue among its readers. We welcome your thoughtful comments.
About comments