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Comments about ‘Christlike mothering: The mother's atonement’

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Published: Wednesday, May 1 2013 5:00 a.m. MDT

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vinniecat
Cottonwood Heights, UT

So is sitting at the table while your partner is cleaning the "father's atonement?"

Aephelps14
San Luis Obispo, CA

While I appreciate that the woman who wrote this is thoughtfully working to become more like the Savior, I do wonder, like Vinniecat above, about the sensitivity of her husband's comment. Children, after they reach a certain age, (which is very young in my opinion) are perfectly capable of cleaning up their own crumbs. The husband is perfectly capable as well. We do more damage by doing for others what they can't for themselves.

jn540
Austin, TX

Aephelps, perhaps as a general rule you're right, but I think there is something very divine in performing small and deliberate acts of service for others, even (especially?) when the recipient is perfectly capable of doing it on his or her own. In my experience, giving and receiving these small and simple tokens of kindness is what causes love to grow between me and the members of my family. Of all of Jesus' acts that the disciples witnessed, I would guess that the one that meant most to them was when he used one of his final moments of mortality to wash their feet. We can all more or less manage to survive on our own, but we cannot make ourselves feel loved.

MormonSean
Salt Lake City, UT

I agree with jn540.

I know many young men who struggle because of negative behaviors, attitudes and choices they have made all their lives, primarily because they weren't that familiar with the alternative choices they could have made. I've been one of them. I still struggle with making the right choice.

I've also asked for help from others and been denied. Every time I asked for help I was given advice to 'simply do the right thing'. It's true that we all know right vs wrong. What everyone seems to ignore is that it's also true that habits are learned. Even breaking habits requires learning how to rethink. Most times I got that advice I felt alone. I felt the love of others but I never felt like I got actual help. As people giving advice, we can either say "You can help yourself on this matter" or we can extend our hand.

Christ's arms are extended to us "all the day long". This is our example to follow.

We do have to learn to change our behavior, but when we repent the atonement does in fact serve to clean up after us.

donn
layton, UT

RE: Christ never required praise.

Jesus accepts worship. Contrast this with the passage In Acts, Paul is called a God by the people of Lystra……Paul stops them, and reminds them he is only a man. No where in scripture does anyone in a right relationship with God accept worship. Accepting worship is reserved for God Almighty alone.

Matthew 28:9-10: And behold, Jesus met them and said, “Greetings!” And they came up and took hold of his feet and worshiped him.

Luke 24:52: While he blessed them, he parted from them and was carried up into heaven. 52 And they worshiped him and returned to Jerusalem with great joy.

John 9:37-38: Jesus said to him, “You have seen him, and it is he who is speaking to you.” 38 He said, “Lord, I believe,” and he worshiped him.

mallaboo111
Salt Lake, UT

Christ doesn't ask for praise, but He does ask for change. We need to ask the same of our children. That's our job as mothers, to lead them away from the "natural man" and teach them the ways of a good, loving human being. Christ cleans up our messes, but only after we've shown sorrow, humility, and faith. If all we do is clean up our children's messes without asking of them to help or without teaching them a better way, then will it really be worth it?

MormonSean
Salt Lake City, UT

mallaboo111

Agreed. Well put.

And to answer the question, I don't know, but I don't suppose there is worth in helping others without at least the basic conditions of proper help as Christ's example gives us.

I've seen a lot of people think they've helped only to enable problems and I truly believe that "without teaching them a better way" is a mentality that is equally destructive. Sometimes someone who isn't fishing needs to be shown how. We all know that though. What we forget is that "helping themselves" doesn't mean we should wait for them to ask us. When we stand idly by we are merely complacent witnesses to their suffering.

Think of approaching someone and saying, "Hey, I learned how to do this, or I once struggled with that, or my dad taught me this lesson, etc"

Extending the helping hand requires extending and not just waiting for others to ask us for help. Sometimes people ask to be fished for just because they don't know they even can on their own, let alone how.

We may need to rethink how we offer help emotionally, financially, and physically to others.

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