Widowhood is unavoidable and some divorces are. However children are always
better off with a Mother and FAther in the home still.
Good for you, Megan!More people need to understand that children
grow up to be healthy, well-adjusted adults in all sorts of families -- not just
in supposedly "ideal" situations. In fact, the argument
about where kids might be better off is irrelevant to the whole gay marriage
debate. In reality, thousands of kids are **already** being raised by gay
couples -- with or without gay marriage. That isn't going to change, even
if marriage rights are denied to those gay couples. Nobody is going
to take those kids away from the gay couples and somehow magically give them to
straight couples to raise -- and the gay couples aren't somehow stealing
kids from stable straight families, either. So the whole "which is
better" argument is irrelevant. Those kids are going to stay where they are,
regardless.Since kids are **already** being raised by gay couples,
the best thing we can do for them is to give those couples the tools they need
to make their families more stable. And that means allowing them to marry
legally.Marriage creates more stable families. Stable families are
good for kids. Everyone who is concerned about children should SUPPORT gay
ALWAYS better off with a father and mother in the home?What about
those with alcoholic or abusive fathers?But I do agree that MARRIAGE
should be between a man and woman. Why not simply allow civil unions and let
the churches decide if they want to hold ceremonies? After all, church
marriages now are actually a civil union conducted in a church building.
Doesn't the minister, rabbi, or bishop always say something like, "And
so by the authority invested in me by the state of . . . . . "
higv..and just how does the mere presence of a male and a female in a home trump
the love, commitment, and caring of a single parent or parents of the same
You hit the nail on the head, Megan. Above all else, love is what makes the
difference in the life of a child, regardless of who gives that love. Thank you
for reminding us of that and thank you for loving your daughter and giving her
the security that comes with your love.
I like the serenity prayer. I would like to know that wisdom to know the things
that I can change or can't.
higvDietrich, IDHowever children are always better off with a
Mother and FAther in the home still.7:08 a.m. April 5, 2013=========Always? Really? higvAgains, wrong with the
all-or-nothing, black and white Pleasantville....I'll bet
little 4 year old Ethan Stacy didn't think so.
Well said. Opponents to same sex marriage have no valid arguments based in
reality. It will happen and like those who opposed the civil rights
movement, they will just look foolish when it's all said and done.
I wouldn't base children's emotional well-being on exceptions. Single
mothers raising children have been around long enough to know that statistically
the children do not fare as well as those raised in a home with a mother and a
father.Gay parenting has no track record as of yet--too new to
declare it a healthy alternative.Congratulations to you, Megan, for
having raised an emotionally healthy daughter. You are an exceptional single
Nicely put, Megan. I'd bet it would be even better for kids in those
situations if their families weren't denigrated just for being what they
SalProvo, UTGay parenting has no track record as of yet--too
new to declare it a healthy alternative.===========Gay
parenting has been around since the dawn of time.Surprise!and
FYI - most gay kids were raised by straight parents.
To "Megan Ribson" the question is what do you want for your children,
and what do they deserve. Do you want the best or second best?If
you want the best for your children, then they need a caring mother and father
in the home. Second best is an involved single parent, third best is a gay
couple.The studies are out there showing that it is best if a child
has a caring mother and father.Gay couples can give children a good
environment, but the research shows that it results in the kids getting involved
in risky sexual behavior when they are teens and adults.So again, do
you want the best for your child, or are you willing to settle for a lesser
"Second best is an involved single parent, third best is a gay
couple."You can't be serious? So you think my family would be
better off if I was raising children as a Single parent than if I was in a
loving, committed, stable marriage to someone else of my same-sex?There is absolutely no basis for such an absurd claim.
Redshirt1701"...but the research shows that it results in the kids
getting involved in risky sexual behavior when they are teens and
adults."I would be most interested to see the "research" you
are basing your opinions on. Could you please provide some links? Attributing
your comments to "research" without providing that "research"
leaves one to wonder if you actually know what your talking about or if you are
making it up out of whole cloth.
To "Utahtex" read "Adolescents of the U.S. national longitudinal
lesbian family study: Sexual orientation, sexual behavior, and sexual risk
exposure" Archives of Sexual Behavior. That study found that the children
raised by gay couples were more likely to think of themselves as bisexual or gay
than their counterparts.There are other articles, but I don't
want to stop you from learning how to use Google. While you are learning to use
Google, look at the pro-gay marriage studies they typically do 1 of 2 things.
They either compare gay marriage to single parents or else only deal with
financial outcomes and don't discuss sexual behaviors of those kids once
they reach adulthood.
@Redshirt --"The studies are out there showing that it is best
if a child has a caring mother and father...."This is simply not
true. In fact, the groups of medical and scientific professionals who know the
MOST about the development of children -- like the American Academy of
Pediatrics, the Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, and the American
Academy of Family Physicians -- have come out in FAVOR of gay marriage, because
they know that children grow up just fine in loving, stable homes with parents
of **either** gender. I challenge you to find **any** group of child
development experts who have come out against gay marriage.I know of
**one** study which claims that children do better in straight homes than in gay
ones. In that study, the "researcher" compared kids in UNSTABLE gay
homes -- homes that mostly had single or divorced parents -- with kids in STABLE
straight homes. Naturally, the kids in the stable homes did better. It had
nothing to do with orientation, and **everything** to do with stability.Marriage improves family stability. Family stability is important for
kids. If you think that kids are important, then you should SUPPORT gay
@Redshirt --"Adolescents of the U.S. national longitudinal
lesbian family study..."This study actually found -- and
I'm quoting directly from that paper: 1. "adolescents
reared in lesbian families are less likely than their peers to be victimized by
a parent or other caregiver", and it also states: " the sexual abuse of
children that occurs within the home is largely perpetrated by adult
heterosexual males" -- in other words, the kids were SAFER in lesbian
families than in straight families;and 2. "0% of
girls and 5.4% of boys self-rated as predominantly-to-exclusively
homosexual." and "the NLLFS (lesbian-raised) adolescent boys were no
more likely to have engaged in same-sex behavior than were the boys in the NSFG
(straight-raised) sample."**Zero** percent of the girls
self-rated as lesbian, and the boys were NO more likely to show same-sex
behavior than straight-raised kids.That paper also states:
"Research has established that there are no significant differences in
psychological well-being between the children of lesbian and heterosexual
parents".NO significant differences. And that paper includes a
LONG list of references to back it up.Keep trying, Red.