Comments about ‘Dear mom on the iPhone: Let me tell you what you don’t see’

Guys, come on. You know what else isn't good for kids? Having them think they are the center of the universe. So this mom took five minutes out of her day for some adult time. Huge sweeping generalization ensues about ignoring your kids. I think one thing we moms can do is give each other a break. Sometimes in life we wait for others attention, and sometimes we don't get that attention, and it's okay to know that you're still lived and the world won't crash down around you. Read "nurture shock". It's pretty interesting.

Dear Mom on the laptop,
I see you there at the desk, hunched over, frantically uploading yet another picture of the "perfect" looking kids/crafts/recipes/boutique decorated lifestyle. Hear your kids yelling at each other in the background? What's that? Your face scowls as another child interrupts your posting. Why so impatient? Why the urgency to spread your opinions and family pictures far and wide? Why aren't you really living your life with your kids-- instead of publishing and idealized version for the whole world to read?

Mommy, I hope you don't take this the wrong way. And, if I sound condescending and judgmental, I hope you realize that isn't the intention of my post.

Why spend your days in front of a computer screen when you could be playing Candyland, or talking to your school child about his day? And maybe, just maybe, you could stop worrying about taking pictures for your "beautiful blog" long enough to enjoy a moment, totally aware, with those adorable angels of yours (without thinking how the moment will translate into a blog post).
Excuse me for mixing my metaphors, but sometimes mommies in glass houses shouldn't cast the first stone.
Because I'm omniscient, I know in your heart that you love your children and wouldn't want to compromise them through blogging.
I know that's not true mommy.
And I know you wouldn't want to make blanket generalizations and cast aspersions on strangers.

I know your heart mommy, and I know that isn't true.

But your kids can't protect their privacy, Mommy. Your need for validation and self-esteem is overriding their needs for a childhood secure from the prying eyes of strangers.

May our narcissism learn boundaries and may we never assume we know the failings or thoughts of others. Let us learn to get the beam out of our own eye, instead of the mote out of our neighbors. Let us learn how to live life without spreading our most intimate moments far and wide for strangers to read...and enjoy the quiet, lovely, wholeness of it all!

while i understand the sentiment behind this article, i feel it is quite judgemental. as women and mothers we need to support each other not constantly pick each other apart. you dont know the story behind the woman on her phone so dont judge. by judging you are infact telling your children, your DAUGHTER, this is how we treat each other ... i sak you this, why wasnt the article written for the Dad on his iPhone?

If you raise children to believe that they're the center of YOUR universe, they're likely to grow up to think they're the center of THE Universe.

To the mom looking at the mom on the iphone: What were you missing while judging mom on the iphone and planning a blog post about it?

Is it important to be fully present with your kids? Absolutely.
Will the time of life with young kids be over all too quickly. Yes.
Do people spend more time that necessary on electronic devices. Probably.

But I think most mom's already know that. Most everyone is just trying to do the best job they can, and one of the most difficult things about being a mom of small kids is the endless criticism and guilt inducing comments from other people.

Everyone faces challenges, everyone has room for improvement, BUT WE'RE ALL TRYING!
Society needs a little more love, a little more understanding, a little more friendship, a little less judging, a little less criticism.

Maybe next time snap a quick shot of the twirling princess and text it to mom on the iPhone so she can see what you noticed that she missed. I'm sure she'll love it. And you might make a new friend.

I thought this article was silly, sanctimonious, and overly sentimental. And I have to ask, where are her kids when she is blogging? What about all the things she misses while they are at school, or sports, or other activities?

Leave it to the internet to judge a mom who's taken two seconds of time for herself, and to dismiss anyone who doesn't like it as "overly sensitive" or having a "guilty conscience." I am right there with the author about feeling like we need to step away from the electronics sometimes. But you know what? I'm pretty sure I only have the right to make that judgment about myself, because I don't KNOW what anyone else has been doing with their time.

The entire premise of this article is faulty, anyway—that a mother should let "everything else fall away" and focus entirely on her kids. What happens in twenty years when those children are gone and Mommy has no idea who she is without all the "wonderful, noisy, sticky-fingered glory" to define her? Guess what: Mommy is still a human being, even when her babies are twirling in their pretty dresses. And if her children know that she thinks about other things in addition to them, that is capital-letter Okay.

When you point that finger, remember there are THREE pointing back at YOU. As a stay at home mom, I don't get as much as a bathroom break by myself. I'm on top of pretty much EVERYTHING when it comes to my children. You can bank on that!!!
Now, I can't take them to the park without being judged.
GREAT.
People need to mind their own business.

Since this article is addressing all moms - When I was a child, there were no cell phones. My mother's and grandmother's time was taken up with cooking, cleaning, dusting, laundry, gardening, ironing, sewing - things that it was expected of them to do. When I grew up, and my children were young, I had to do all of that, plus grade papers and make lesson plans. We didn't get to pay attention to the kids EVERY time they called us to come look. Does that make all three of us bad mothers? No. Because those are the things society says we should do.

Now the cell phone allows us to conduct business outside of the house, to go anywhere. You think you know all there is to know about that mom. That iPhone time could be paying for the groceries and gas to get to the park Her kids are outside, in the sun, playing, rather than inside. Nice job being judgmental without facts.

Oh, and a followup to my comment. My children are grown, but I managed to spend time with each of them today; the eldest because she lives so close and we were able to have several conversations while dinner was made, while chickens were tended, outside inthe yard in the sunshine. I spoke with my other child through - gasp! - Facebook chat and then on the phone, because he does not live close, being a Marine.

He spoke to me via an - gasp! - iPhone. Yep - evil technology that lets me keep abreast of what my children do, even though they are grown. Now I know what was up with my kid's days - will you be able to say the same when yours are grown?