Comments about ‘Letter: Surrounded by people, but why are we afraid to look at each other?’

Huh?

As I walk on sidewalks, in malls, and other public places I constantly see people looking back at me. Some smile. Some say hello out loud. Some simply say hello with their eyes and a smile and a nod.

But then, when I'm walking, I'm usually smiling. I'm looking at others around me. I admit, I am somewhat funny looking, but I don't think that's why people are smiling at me.

Could it be that the smile or expression on my face tells others how to react when they see me?

Could the expression on your face be sending a different message?

I have lived all over the country, from Alaska to Maine, Massachusetts to Texas, Ohio to Utah, but the only place that I have seen where is this seems to be true more often than not, is Utah.

Move to the south. You're likely to get at least a "good morning" with your eye contact, and perhaps even a "how's your day?"

You will tend to get back what you give out. When I lived in Idaho everybody waived when passing by in a car. I was confounded by it at first think I must have a familiar face but it was just people being friendly. Small town thing. So now I at least wave at people in my neighborhood.

Kind of sounds like a personal problem. When I walk and greet others its my own smile and greeting that helps others realize I'm just being friendly.

Why do you conclude they are "afraid" to look at you? You seem to suggest, they are just focused in on getting to class or some related issue. They don't feel they have the time to talk, don't want to get "involved", to be diverted from the main goal,kind of self centered. Of course that's not ideal but it may be real. Perhaps you can ask a few people you know and trust if and why they look away from others.

Then again, you have to look somewhere I suppose; sometimes people's eyes may "meet" unintentionally and you look away in case they think you are rudely staring at them.
I don't know if I'm complicating a simple phenomenon or you're simplifying a complex one. Maybe a bit of both.

"As I walk every day, I am surrounded by people — bombarded by them. I am in a mass of constant motion and purpose."

Glad to see that excellent writing is not a completely lost art in schools today. Nicely done.

Afraid to look at each other?
Utah Drivers can't stop texting or talking on their cell phones long enought to DRIVE!

But go ahead, keep focusing Distracted Driving laws only pertaining to Alcohol use.
Since it's really more of a round about way of forcing everyone to obey the "Word of Wisdom" than it is about safe driving.

I'm sorry. I'm an unattractive crippled old fat guy. When I smile at people, I apparently don't seem very menacing, and folks always smile back. Maybe it's a handicap of youth. But you wrote a lovely and poignant letter. Thanks.

I say hi to nearly everybody I pass, whether I know them or not, and I open doors for people of both sexes from time to time. Although most people will say "thank you" for holding a door for them, I'm surprised at the number of people who ignore a friendly greeting. Yes, it's frustrating, and it's easy to take it personally, but I try to give them the benefit of the doubt and assume that maybe they're having the worst day of their life. Even so, there is little excuse for being rude.

Living in the south now, I can tell you it is night and day. I used to think the people in my home state were friendly, surely more outwardly friendly than those who live in the Pacific Northwest. But here in the south, eye contact is the norm, a "how are you doing" to a stranger isn't uncommon.

But that said, lets not confuse outwardly friendliness with how friendly people are, around the world. They may not smile all the time, they may not acknowledge you as you walk buy, but the reassuring thing I have found is that when someone is in trouble, people no matter where I have lived reach out to help how they can.

So, yes, as smile as you walk by is always nice... but know that the person not smiling back could be truly a nice person. And heck, have some fun. As I walk around europe on my frequent trips, I smile at everyone. Many don't know what to make of it.... think I have lost my mind. But it is fun, and I've met some great people that way. Be the first to be friendly.

If you'd like to be looked at, dress provocatively. That should send a message.

Speaking of which, females seldom make eye contact with a passing male because they fear they are sending a message of... um, you get the picture.

Who has time to look at, smile, and great everyone they pass in a busy mall, anyway You'd never get any shopping done.