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Comments about ‘Studies challenge widely held assumptions about same-sex parenting’

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Published: Saturday, June 9 2012 10:01 p.m. MDT

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A voice of Reason
Salt Lake City, UT

Mukkake,

I didn't say that because they don't breed, but because they WON'T breed. I clarified this for you, yet you resort to labeling my words as asinine instead of producing a counter-argument based in reason.

If a man lost the function of his arm, as a member of my family did- they could still easily be qualified to be a virtuous teacher of the telos of the human body. However, if a man with a completely functional body decided to never use it, never lift a finger, never exercise their designed abilities- then it more than reasonable to claim that their rejection of their own design disqualifies them from teaching others about the telos of their own body. I'd even question such a persons mental health for making such a blunt rejection of the reality given them.

Some couples choose not to procreate. I still believe in multiplying and replenishing the Earth, so I do not justify them either, neither life-long celibacy- But that doesn't disprove that the state we govern or society or morality isn't required to accept them. Even then, their parenting qualifications are not in question, gays are.

AggieScientist
Logan, UT

It seems to me that the researcher compared apples and oranges: adult children from "Intact Biological Families" are compared with adult children from “Families that Have Mothers or Fathers Who Have Had at Least One Gay Romance of Indeterminate Length.”

Why is this a problem? Here is an example: If I were to conduct a study of adults who were raised in two different religions would it be fair to compare children who were raised in Catholic households, that were Catholic for the entirety of their childhoods, with children who were raised in households that may have been, even for the briefest time, members of the LDS Church?

You would probably say that was unfair. That the proper comparison would be between children raised in a Catholic home for the entirety of their childhood with children who were raised in an LDS household for the entirety of their childhood.

Unfortunately, this study in largely invalidated because it makes an unfair comparison.

williary
Kearns, UT

With as many dead-beat parents as there are out in the world today, including the majority of those coming from "traditional" marriages, any gay couple who volunterily takes on the enormous task of raising a child, gets a big God Bless You from me.

The world could use many more couples just like them.

Truthseeker
SLO, CA

Re:atl134

Good points

Studies show more children die in homes where there are firearms. Should we prohibit gun owners from raising children?

The study provides no answers really. Obviously more research needs to be done. But it is safe to say, there are plenty of dysfunctional, damaged adults and children who were raised by heterosexual parents.

Baccus0902
Leesburg, VA

What is the meaning of "takes a Village" to raise a child?

Let's think a little bit:

What if a child have a set of parents of the same sex. Parents who provide material, emotional and spiritual support.

What if another child have a set of parents of the opposite sex. Parents who provide material, emotional and spiritual support.

These two children go to the same school, frequent the same church, let say the LDS church. Live in the same neighborhood.

Do we expect these two children to grow with the same self confidence and outlook to life?

The result may be different, not because of the parents but because of the cultural gap outside the home.

As always I am surprised of those in this paper who claim to know God. However, they preach doom, fear and destruction.

My heavenly father, the one I met through the LDS Church is a God of love, not limited by fears or the bigotry of men. He loves all his children and wants for all of them to be happy.

Many, many of them find Happiness in a same sex relationship who is blessed by God directly in their homes.

my slc
Newport Beach, CA

Utah Businessman:

I am legally married in California, 2008. Six states (CT, IA, MA, NH, NY, and VT) plus the DC also recognize legal gay marriage. Over 35% of Americans live in states that recognize gay marriage or strong civil unions.

This issue is not going to go away. It will happen in out life times, and much sooner (3-5 years) I believe.

Kevin J. Kirkham
Salt Lake City, UT

The study said that the differences might be due to societal bigotry. Logical. Also, the lack of committed relationships. If gays were allowed marriage, they would have stronger/committed families. Let's help these kids by strengthening their families through marriage.

This was front page news due to the DN's war against SSM. Too bad the kids of SS families suffer colatteral damage from this. DN needs to remember that gays will always have kids so whether or not SS families are equally good doesn't matter. As stated, kids from uneducated homes or where English isn't spoken likewise fare poorer. The Christ-like thing is to help those kids who need help to thrive rather than denying them the legal protections they and their parents need.

The DN forgets that marriage isn't about having kids. If it was, the elderly, the infertile/sterile and death row inmates would be denied marriage. If raising kids in less than ideal environments disqualify couples from marriage, then the poor, those with limited English skills, the uneducated, etc...should likewise be excluded.

I wish people would be logically consistent and more Christ-like on this topic.

delasalle
Sandy, UT

I'm amazed sometimes at some of the research I see being done out there, presumably on the public's dime, to reach conclusions that we all already know. Let me guess next you are going to write an article about research done showing single parent children have different experiences from two parent children.

The conclusions of this research are NOT what is being debated in the same sex arena. The question is whether in spite of these conclusions same sex couple should be allowed to adopt and raise children. Divorced parents, single parents, parents on welfare, immigrant parents (legal or illegal), city parents, rural parents, double income parents, etc., all raise children differently (generally speaking) from each other, yet we have been able to come to the conclusion that it is still ok for all of these groups to raise children.

If you want to do some worthwhile research, compare the differences between single parent homes and gay parent homes and see which is "better" for the child. Since it's the latter, should we then not allow single parents to exist???

Swedish reader
Stockholm, Sweden

The only (more or less) fair comparison would be between children raised their entire childhood by their biological parents in an intact relationship (without problems such as abuse), children raised their entire childhood by same sex parents in an intact relationship (without the abovementioned problems) and children raised their entire childhood by adoptive parents in an intact relationship (without the abovementioned problems). All these children would have stability, and the only factors that could affect them differently would be a) whether their parents are their biological parents and b) whether their parents are straight or gay. I'd be interested to know the result - and I'd be aware that individual personalities in parents and children could still affect the outcome. Still, this study shows an interesting tendency that should be further investigated.

raybies
Layton, UT

The problem with this study is that it presents statistical information that runs contrary to many prevailing opinion makers.

qapilot
Orem, UT

There is so much yet to be learned about the science of all of this. However, there are some obvious truths one does not need a scholarly study to discover that are being ignored by the media:

Men and women are different. That's just how it is. Children thrive on those differences. Two gay male fathers cannot provide for a daughter what a woman can: a mother! How can a man, even a gay man, possibly help a girl through the unique feelings girls and women experience? Through her first period? How can a lesbian couple possibly fill a girl's early biological need for acceptance and love from a male (her father)? Boys, likewise, need a mother to provide compassion and nurturing, and a father to encourage independence and show him what it means to be a man. Men and women, despite best intentions and great capacity for love, cannot substitute for each other. To dismiss the unique value of a mother or a father is the height of arrogance. Parenting is not an individual pursuit. It is an amazing partnership where the pair is greater than the sum of its parts.

Really???
Kearns, UT

Consider this scenario. There are two families who live next door to each other. Both families have three children of similar ages.

The children in the first house have friends over all the time. Children from the neighborhood and school flock to this house to play in the yard, watch movies with the kids, and sometimes even have dinner. The kids all seem to have plenty of friends, and the adults in the neighborhood seem to love and respect this family.

The children in the second house, however, don't seem to have many friends. If they do spend time with other kids, it's usually not at their house. The neighborhood kids, in fact, aren't allowed to play at that house because the parents are homosexual. The other parents don't want their children to play in a home where something like that happens.

What environmental factors could play into the children's emotional and social development in this story?

Freedom-In-Danger
WEST VALLEY CITY, UT

Liberals say "I told you so" when studies support their opinion. When it doesn't... they question the integrity of the info... even when the study is conducted under the same level of standards or higher than the studies they loved.

I don't really care what studies say. You can look at numbers all day, but if you don't go outside you won't see the world very clearly. I know from first hand experience that homosexuality is a sin, is wrong, and damages lives. And if you think I'm ignorant just cause I ignore numbers, think about the fact that tomorrow another guy with numbers will say the opposite thing, and the next day the opposite again.

Marriage is between a guys and gals. That's the way God made it. That's what we owe children.

RanchHand
Huntsville, UT

@RockOn;

Yes, facts ARE a stubborn thing. In the relatively few years that scientists have been studying genes, out of over 2 BILLION, they've found the funcationality of a handful. Just because they haven't identified a "gay gene" or combination of genes yet, doesn't mean they won't. They have MILLIONS of genes to analyze yet. There's a FACT you conveniently ignore.

@Abinadis friend;

You will ONLY "always be right" by obedience to god IF your god is real; otherwise, you're fooling yourself.

@VOR;

I'm NOT rejecting "moral standards". I'm rejecting YOUR version of "moral standards".

All;

Traditionally, over all these 1000's of years you're discussing; the "family" model included THE ENTIRE CLAN, not just a mommy and a daddy.

@Utah Businessman:

Anybody who claims to have "great empathy" for gays, and then expects them to live celibate, sterile lives, is lying to themselves; they have no empathy.

5
Orem, UT

According to a study by a Jewish Rabbi and a Protestant Minister the only time in the history of the earth that civil authority of a culture sanctioned and supported gay unions was prior to the flood. Most societies have tolerated it, most notably the Romans and Greeks, but they didn't formally sanction and support it. The authors of the sudy postulate that was the reason God determined that children born at that time had no chance to choose right from wrong, therefore God destroyed civilization and started over.Do we face a similar fate, that is total distruction of our society by some catastrophic means?

georgeman
Kearns, UT

I remember when there were studies being done about single parent families and how that would affect children growing up. Single parents were all over the media showing how well adjusted their kids were, and how one parent can do jsut as well as two. Now after many decades of one parent running out on another and divorce becomming commonplace, we are seeing the consequences of single parenting.

If history teaches us one thing, it is that we make choices now that we think are okay, but the outcomes won't be realized until we are too deep into it to change back.

When the taboos of the past become commonplace, the taboos of the future will be what was commonplace in the past.

RanchHand
Huntsville, UT

@5;

So the flood was the fault of "the gays"? Good grief, and I thought people couldn't possibly be any more ignorant than they currently are.

---
There are numerous studies that show that children of same-sex couples are as well adjusted as children of heterosexual couples. Where are the notations for these studies DN? They don't fit your agenda so you ignore them completely.

very concerned
Sandy, UT

I am well-aware that many of you do NOT believe in prophets and apostles. I cannot and will not force you to believe as I do. My point is that you would do well to begin to believe. Truly, the fate of the human race depends on that belief and obedience. I know I'm not being strictly scientific about it, but I have have seen enough of the *substance of things hoped for and evidence of things not seen* (see Hebrews 11:1) to be really concerned for humankind (us). I urge you to accept the testimonies of Prophets and Apostles; both in your own personal lives and as a society. They are true.

Cate
SALT LAKE CITY, UT

In my many years of teaching, I have had the opportunity to work with a number of same-sex parents, as well as various other parenting situations, such as a child being raised by a grandparent alone . I have found the same loving commitment and caring from almost all of these unconventional parents as I have found among traditional parents. As a teacher, I have observed that good parenting depends very much on the character and commitment of the parents, and not on their sexual orientation. We welcome gay couples in our church at HUCC, and have found them to wonderful additions to our faith community. These articles in the DN, which seem to have an agenda, seem to be in the face of great parents right in our community who are doing a great job, and their wonderful children. These families matter to me just as much as the many other families of our neigborhoods and communities. I have seen close up the good work of same-sex couples at both school and church.

aminahyaquin
GALLIPOLIS FERRY, WV

IMO, irrespective of parental gender, until we examine the CONVERGENCE of risk factors for children, do more to make daycare SMALL and better settings, stop encouraging the parents of very young children to work, help families support themselves on a single ordinary wage instead of needing to work multiple jobs to provide "success" almost exclusively measured by money in this newly hyper-materialistic society, kids will not be best started.

Our culture used to inculcate happiness through family and friends as the primary extrinsic motivators (and God) and the intrinsic motivators of being a decent and capable, responsible individual who cares for others and helps community (replaced now by the desire to make money at any cost in any way no matter who is hurt, and bribing ones children with fancy material crap); until we reward content of character instead of wealth as displayed via celebrity entitlement, than i personally think the outcomes for far too many precious children will be tawdry and shabby no matter what they self-report.

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