Learning to work and contribute to your own schooling (present and futures
success) is the essence of education. That process should have started long
before entering the University. Mom and Dad can provide additional help (or
scholarships), BUT the bottom line is, child you are going to help yourself
There is plenty of free money out there in the form of scholarships. My son
received a full-academic scholarship and hasn't had to pay a dime for his
education. In order to get it, he had to show self-discipline in high school
and continue to do so in college in order to maintain his scholarship. He takes
ownership for his education not because of financial concerns, but because he
learned at an early age that hard work is self-fulfilling and gratifying. The same should be true for this scenario. The amount of money parents
pay should be based on how their children have demonstrated appreciation for it
thorough hard work and dedication to self-improvement. Handing out the money
isn't good, nor is witholding any money. Rewarding youth for good
production and for demonstrating an ability to provide is a good system.
LValfre,Gosh, an LDS paper that has reported on all things LDS since
day one (over 100 years ago) must be doing it all to support Romney. I guess
you'd probably say that they had Romney's agenda in mind back then
too, huh?Oh wait, that's right... this article was about
college, how much kids party, and who pays for it. I almost forgot that Romney
wasn't even mentioned here. Wow!Today is just rife with anyone
wanting to attack the LDS Church or the Deseret News. It's like on every
other article there is some comment seemingly unrelated to the article that just
wants to bash on people they don't like.
Gosh the way DNews throws out these new articles equating stay at home
mom's to the millions of mom's who work FT and take care of the
family. Trying so hard to support Romney without saying it due to political
My sister and her husband had program similar to WYOREADER; they paid for the
first semester of the first year. As a result, their kids settled for less
expensive, lower quality schools and pursued non-demanding majors that allowed
them to work (while attending) to pay for school.My program was
different. We paid 100% of the cost of our kid's education contingent on
them getting accepted to a good school and pursuing a useful degree. The contrast between my children and my sister's children is stark. My
two sons who have graduated to date have high paying jobs and are well situated
to compete in today's global economy. My sister's kids: not so
much.South Korean and Chinese parents are paying for their
kids' educations. The governments of Sweden, UK and others pay for their
students' educations (even at U.S. institutions). U.S. parents who
don't dramatically help their kids are setting them up to fail in our
highly competitive global economy. Because my sister did not do her
part, my kids' future tax dollars could be subsidizing some of her kids.
Parents: please recognize the world has changed and do your part.
While students who work long hours to support themselves and pay college costs
have the lowest level of high-risk behaviors like drinking, according to the
research, they are also the least likely to graduate and they have the lowest
incomes when they start jobs. Stated differently, according to this
article, kids who party do better in school, graduate sooner, and receive
higher-paying jobs than kids who do not party!
It's easy to look at the results of a study and say "kids will do this
if given a free ride". The truth is that all of us are different. We have
similarities and often face similar challenges- but we are all also very very
unique and are still individuals. The only way nearly everyone studies social
patterns is by abandoning the individuals behind those patterns. Perfect parents
can raise kids who make bad choices and bad parents can raise kids who rise
above their circumstance. The truth is- we all know right from wrong, we all
have free will- and the best thing we can do is be thoughtful, prayerful, and
attend to each other's needs. Helping each other isn't wrong.
Sometimes less help or more help is wiser- but such decisions are best made
individually. Studies showing whether 'this category' (rich, poor,
black, white) only separate and categorize us into numbers that rarely provide
actual answers for anyone. Meanwhile, living righteously does entitle us to an
abundance of answers, good advice, and guidance through life.I know,
I know- I'm rambling on about those lousy inductive arguments, really
guesses based on statistics again! :)
@john Charity SpringYou, sadly, reflect the very attitude that holds
so many youth from reaching there full potential. Don't get me wrong. A
child can help with the effort. But this isn't 1965 or even 1988 any
more. Tuition, room and board costs have risen much faster than low-end wages.
It simply isn't possible for most students to exit a better university
without a lot of debt. There is a reason why education debt is the single
largest debt bomb that still is yet to be addressed.Your attitude
reflects an outdated time period and is not based in reality. it is exactly
this outdated and dangerous attitude that I was addressing.
"Any parent who puts his child through college is doing that child a real
disservice by exposing him to increased risk of addiction and
immorality."Quite the blanket statement.Any chance
of seeing something to back up that statement? Or was that just a gem from the
world of JCS?
@John Charity Springs: You're all into condemnation, aren't you?
An interesting follow-up would be to investigate if students whose parents pay
for their schooling are also those that "fail to launch." Perhaps the longer someone depends on mom and dad, the slower they are to
accept responsibility for their actions?Students who have to pay
their way through scholarships and work know the value of every quarter and
every minute. Being financially responsible, even if it may just be
a shared expense, such as paying for their housing and food while parents pay
for tuition, is a valuable life experience. College is the perfect
time for kids to start becoming adults responsible for their own lives. If they don't learn that during the college years, when will they
learn it? Living in Mom and Dad's basement after graduation?
@John Charity Spring,You're funny and rather sad.
Any student who spends his time partying, rather than studying and working,
should be condemed. College should be about hard work and discipline, not the
frivolous pursuit of temporary pleasure.Students should work to put
themselves through college--no exceptions. Any parent who puts his child through
college is doing that child a real disservice by exposing him to increased risk
of addiction and immorality.
Too many in LDS culture believe that their children need to pay for most/all of
college. This is as outdated as a paper calendar. While a few exceptionally
talented students can manage paying for their own schooling while getting the
most out of their education, too many end up dragging out their education for
years, going to a school at a third rate institution, or never do sufficiently
well to allow them to get into the best graduate programs. They have limited
opportunities coming out of school and the parents blame their children's
poor opportunities on George W, Pres Obama or "the economy".If you look at the top undergraduate and graduate schools nationally, you find
that a large percentage of the students have parents who are making significant
financial sacrifices for the student to be there or they have saved and prepared
just for such an event. When the student has some skin in the game, and KNOWS
that mom and/or dad are giving up a lot for them to be there, those students, in
my experience, work very hard. Most have worked hard to get there, and want to
make the most of the opportunity.
1/2 got tuition, books and housing1/3 got nothing1/4 got everything
paid for by parents.Uh....that's more than 1 :-)Nevertheless, I agree that kids need to work summers or part time during
school for personal expeneses and more. The flip side is parents who could well
afford to help their kids and don't, thinking that it is virtuous to insist
they support themselves. This often requires the students to take 6-7 years to
finish while supporting themselves. That does't make economic sense
It is simply the fruits of entitlement.
My wife and I paid for 2 of her three degrees and 1 of mine without any
financial support. I believe kids should have jobs and pay as much college as
they can. It gives them a sense of accomplishment and appreciation for it. Some
support from parents helps them graduate in a reasonable time, and shows love
and care. That was our approach with our kids. Son paid for his own MBA, with
help from work. If he had needed some help, we would have given it, though. We
plan on leaving some money to help with our grandkids' educations, missions
or home down payments if they don't use it all for college. It will only be
given AFTER successful completion of each semester.
It took a study at BYU to prove this?Wow, what a no brainer.
I hope no government money was spent on this 'study'.
I took a class from Dr. Nelson, really great class. Nice study, provides some
interesting implications for my future family.
my kids must really be parting hard at cougarville
I think its great that they are doing studies on these kinds of things, but the
results from this one seem kind of obvious from the get-go.
Kids that are on a full ride from mom & dad also take longer to finish their
degrees. When somebody else pays your tuition, it's easy to sign up for
that bowling class that ends up distracting you from taking classes that you
actually need for your major.The full ride also makes kids more
likely to change majors when they find the going gets tough.Because
I paid for college myself, I didn't take a single class that I didn't
need to graduate and I never changed majors....I couldn't afford to pay for
unnecessary classes or throw away years and dollars by changing majors.
Which is why my husband and I help our kids get there the first year and then
they are on their own. 2 out of 5 have graduated from Weber State, one still at
Weber one more heading to Utah State this fall and the last one headed to High
School next year. If they have ownership in their education they appreciate it
more and do better! It's just like anything with kids if you just hand it
to them they don't appreciate it unless they have to work for it.