Deseret News | What's important is to get up when you fall, each time you fall

Reader comments
Connie Sokol: What's important is to get up when you fall, each time you fall

K | 10:50 a.m. Sept. 14, 2009

Thank you, Thank you!

Boy how I needed to know I'm not the only who falls down... on this horrible Monday morning!

jan dowling | 9:52 p.m. Sept. 14, 2009

I have too much to say and this will take two or three entries
As I read today’s article I had the same feelings I had with the other two articles of yours that I have read. Your articles seem a bit self-serving. Even if I give you the benefit of the doubt and empathize with your feelings of failure this article doesn’t work. I agree it is hard when serving another makes you run late, it does make one feel rattled trying to meet the needs of children or others who rely on you, and missing an event of a child involved in an extra-curricular activity, especially when they have excelled at it, can be disheartening. Not to mention the children calling you from their cell phone and the elementary school that failed to follow your pre-planned instructions. Then there was trying to fit your children into your smaller second car. Still, in terms of failures I wonder if you realize that there are many mothers who would weep to have those difficulties.

jan dowling | 7:58 a.m. Sept. 15, 2009

Maybe their children don’t excel or maybe their children could have excelled were it not that the parent’s skills have never been up to snuff. Mom knows it, but she just does what she can and agonizes when she falls short. Can you see why I find your articles self-serving? Can you understand how your words are shallow at best and insensitive at worst? It seems to me that they provide an outlet–maybe even a stage, for you more than they support others. There is certainly nothing wrong with that as long you recognize it for what it is. Really, I suppose it is to your advantage if you don’t recognize your words as shallow as that would mean that you have not had the depth of life’s experiences as some others. However, I do wish that you recognized that many of your comments are salt on open wounds.

Comments continue below

jan dowling | 7:59 a.m. Sept. 15, 2009

I have often wondered what a “life coach” is. And, frankly, have had a somewhat skeptical opinion of the profession. I think this article pretty much epitomizes what I supposed the profession to be. Cheerleading. Not that there is anything wrong with cheerleading- I’ve done my share of it. It’s good to root for “the team”. It’s just that most of the student-body isn’t on “the team”. As a matter of fact, very few of them are. And generally those not on “the team” are the people who really deserve the cheers. And realistically, not from the cheerleaders but from people who care about them and whom they care about.

And while I am at it–really, 5 rows of the column describing your “weaknesses”, followed by a smidgeon of a wake up call. I vacillate between considering that shallow and considering it exploitative of children with disabilities.

jan dowling | 11:11 a.m. Sept. 15, 2009

You will need to be little more direct for me. Exactly when did you fail or fall down that day?

Becky | 10:19 p.m. Sept. 16, 2009

Gee, Jan, lighten up. It's a newspaper column.

Brian | 9:53 a.m. Sept. 23, 2009

Jan!
Wow! I think maybe you have fallen a time or two without getting up. I think Connie's point is that we all "lose it" a time or two but it doesn't matter. Get up, brush it off, and try again; but take your new experience with you. I like to find profound lessons in all life's experiences. It's nice that Connie does the same without blaming others for her mistakes.
The effort you put into exposing the rocks in Connie's lake is pathetic.

Jan Dowling | 4:32 p.m. Sept. 23, 2009

Well, I re-read my comments to see if something I said is too dark. I signed my name intentionally as I knew my comments were direct and felt it only fair that if I was going to say it I better have the courage to put my name to it. You know how people can be unusually mean on walls. And, I stand by my statements. Because she does not admit anything close to less than perfection the remarks sound shallow and sugar coated. Hardly profound. And not very humorous if that was what she was going for. Although I will admit that when I first started reading the article I thought is was satire.
However, on the other hand, no one has ever told me I need to lighten up before or that any of my efforts are pathetic. But I have fallen more than a time or two and with out getting back up. It can be tough at times.

janana | 4:37 p.m. Sept. 23, 2009

I think the comments (Jan's) are well thought through and have merit. Seems like she spent more effort into the product than the columnist. I agree and rarely read the column for that reason.

shannon | 5:03 p.m. Sept. 23, 2009

Jan nailed it for me as well. I appreciate her direct and thoughtful response, and that her name is attached. It is just a newspaper column but doesn't fit the entertainment category so it sometimes comes across a little white washed.

backdoorannie | 7:24 p.m. Sept. 23, 2009

When I need help or fall down I would rather have Jan at my doorstep.

Alex Bunce | 10:09 p.m. Sept. 23, 2009

I am a high school student and I found this article while looking for examples of narrative essays. Connie didn't ever fall down. Sure she had a hectic day, but when did she make any mistakes? She was helping a friend in need, she has a subaru as a second car, her kids have cell phones, she pre-scheduled her child to not go on the bus, and it was the school that messed up (must've been a public one). All she left out was her morning jog, and the homemade bread. I would have enjoyed this article much more if it would have been about the boy who kept getting up. As it was it seemed a little braggy.

Mackenzie | 11:55 p.m. Sept. 24, 2009

Anyone who is in the public eye in anyway, should understand that there will always be oposition to what they have said in some way or another. That being said, I am unclear to what type of article this is. The headline reads about getting up after falling down, not how mom has a long day. It seems as though the real credit to the headline, should be about the resiliant child who kept overcoming his battle. Most of the articles seem to be more about mom and her life. I would think that being an opinion writer, the writer would be getting opinions from others and including those in the articles versus just the writers life history of how her life works. Everyone has struggles in life and no two persons are alike. Mom's are not the only ones that have these types of issues in the family. But if you are trying to get readers that are only females, than you hit the gender, but probably with the wrong touch. Not everyone handles situations like someone else. Just another opinion, like everyone else's on the comment board.

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