Comments about ‘Moving on: Senior citizens and their families face tough choices’

This sounds so great and really outlines the options avaliable except one---finances. All of these options are expensive for most people heading into their senior years. My mother was a professional who was very careful with her money by saving and investing. It seemed she had enough to cover these type of expenses but when the time came for us to consider less independent living options we were shocked at the costs. What options are out there to help seniors pay for this? Maybe that would be a good followup article.

We are in exactly the same situation as Deb. My Father (who is almost 95), so far, is able to live alone. He's lonesome (I'm 4 hours away from him and so can only go to be with him every couple of weeks), but he's managing. But the time is coming, it must, when he won't be able to live alone. He also managed his money well and has a good nest-egg. But we (my Brother and I) know it won't last long if we must pay for having him live in a retirement community. YES! Please write an article about options to help seniors pay for this. There ARE options for those who didn't save money and are close to being destitute. But what options are available to those who were responsible and saved - so they aren't destitute - but the money just isn't enough for a retirement community? It seems those people are almost "punished" for having been responsible and saved - there are no programs to help them, yet there are programs for those who didn't save.

We talked to my mom about moving for a few years before it actually happened. We took her to see a senior community and she was sold! She sold her house and moved within a month.

My mother could not care for herself. Two of us (her kids) lived nearby. We hired college girls to be "housekeepers" and paid them $10 an hour. They were there for several hours each day and checked her medications and treatments. Some of the college kids went on to become nurses.

We also arranged with a home health care company for frequent medical visits. The cost was about half that of a nursing home and part of that was paid by medicare.

She got better care than she would have in a rest home, lived (and died) in her own home. No regrets.

You are right, finances are an important item. In my case, 2 of my kids are unemployeed & have used most of their savings trying to survive. Another both the husband and wife work, but they hardly make it. The 4th is in a nursing home far away because of medical conditions. We try to get to see her a couple of times a year.

Then there is us, 73 & 74 retired, have lived very plain & saved what we thought was not near enough, now we know it wasn't enough. We have looked at a senior facility, but only have enough for a couple of years with what we have.

There are more seniors coming and i don't know what shape they are in financially but undoubtly,some, even those who have tried to save may need something something they can afford. Save your old barn, it may make affordable senior housing.

I am a psychologist and I have been working with seniors for more than 10 years. After seeing the problems that families face caring for the aging parents I started a free information and resource website call HelpWithMyParents We are working hard to try to let people know about everything that is out there that can be helpful as they try to meet the needs of their aging parents.

Thanks, American Citizen, for your Comments. I'm the Anonymous write who wrote a Comment (above). Some of your solutions I had not thought of before. I've made a copy of what you wrote. Thanks, again.

Today my father was moved to an alzheimers care facility. It is hard on my mother. He has gone downhill quickly since Christmas, but she has done her best to care for him.
My sister and I would take turns helping out about 3-4 days a week. She started going on vacations-a cruise or a visit to a friend-something that would take her out of the house for a week at a time.

Two weeks ago, when it was only the two of them at home, He became angry and tried to beat her up. He had developed sundowners syndrome. She fled the house in her nightgown afraid for her life.
We admitted him to the hospital the next day.

We were lucky to find a place for him at $5K a month. The other places are all $7K-10K.
He continues to ask us to "take me home, take me with you" but we have to think of my mothers safety.

One solution to "some money but not enough" is to have your parent(s)sign over their assets to you. This has to be done about 2 years before they will need care to be eligible. We know several people that have done that-precisly for the reasons stated above. Some money-but not nearly enough to help them for the rest of their lives.
If you don't do this, and put the folks in a nursing home, then when the funds are gone, they will most likely have to move to a state funded place anyway. Then they leave their friends and have to move when their minds are not as sharp.

Another option that really hasn't been addressed well in the article is In-home personal Care option. There are companies out there that will come into the home and take care of individuals for as little as a few hours a week to as long as full-time 24/7 care. Things that are becoming difficult like cooking, cleaning and running errands can all be turned over to a caregiver. This could not only save some money (and in some situations a substantial amount), but it allows the loved one to stay in the home where they feel most comfortable. Financing options can be explored like reverse mortgages, long-term care insurance and waiver programs like the "new choices waiver program".

I also think in-home care is an important option for loved ones to consider. Respite for family caregivers is critical and most seniors do want to stay in their current living environment for as long as possible. If you are a family caregiver, you should sign up for Caring Right at Home, a free, non-commercial newsletter with information, advice and support for adult caregivers:caringnews.com Always has an article on a dementia-related topic, good stuff.