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Curbside goodbyes at the MTC

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Liberty | 1:37 p.m. June 3, 2009

No matter how it is done, it is an tough time for parents.

Anonymous | 1:48 p.m. June 3, 2009

Sure, being tough on illegal immigration breaks up families... but THIS DOESN'T????

New era...it's about time | 2:13 p.m. June 3, 2009

It's true that it is always tough for people to say goodbye to their missionaries, and this will be a bit of a nuisance for some LDS families who have family traditions...

To be honest, this should be an adjustment, and not be an nuisance for anyone. Every other MTC in the world is already doing these sorts of things. It was only a matter of time before this stuff was coming anyways.

On top of that, I don't think any worthy, desirous missionary would want to get delayed or sent home because of an illness. The safety and well-being of LDS missionaries ought to be the top priority for ALL members of the Church, not just the MTC or the missionaries themselves and their families.

Not being able to attend orientation meeting with friends, your girlfriend or boyfriend, and family should be the last thing on a missionary's mind at this point.

Being healthy and well is the priority here, not getting an hour extra before saying goodbye. We should be honoring missionary service when missionaries return with honor, not when they depart!

Comments continue below

wow | 2:19 p.m. June 3, 2009

thinking back to the feeling in your gut when you leave your family like gives me that same feeling even now.....loved it, but that was a tough day.

RE: Anonymous | 2:28 p.m. June 3, 2009

Sorry, I must have missed the in-depth focus on illegal immigration in the MTC story. Could you please either: a) Enlighten me why that topic is in any way relevant, or b) Get some help for an apparent obsession that causes you to think and talk about illegal immigration even when it isn't relevant? Thanks!

The Truth | 2:29 p.m. June 3, 2009

Anonymous,

I'm having a hard time how illegal immigration relates to this?

To your ill-conjured point, it is also important to remember that God is no respecter of persons therefore he is no respecter of the invisible country borders that men have arbitrarily created.

Thats too bad | 2:57 p.m. June 3, 2009

I personally know of more than 5 people who have become converts because they accompanied a missionary to the MTC and sat thru the spiritual meeting and goodbye held inside. The spirit inside the MTC is one nearly unmatched anywhere else! Taking an investigator to the drop off now seems almost counter productive.

Although I do see the good side in such a move, I think an opportunity was lost as well.

Re: Thats too bad | 3:22 p.m. June 3, 2009

Although I've been there and can understand your statement to a certain extent, I still find it an odd thing to say. As they said, the changes were already in the works, and were just hastened by the flu concerns. I'm quite sure those investigators would have been given another opportunity to feel the spirit confirm to them what they were searching for, had the MTC experience not been possible, because, after all, God loves them and knows them individually.

California Steve | 3:42 p.m. June 3, 2009

A lot of us sent sons (or daughters) on missions who didn't even go to Provo. We said our good byes at the airport as they left for Africa etc.

mike | 3:51 p.m. June 3, 2009

We always seem to take things away that are special and seldom add, we are becoming way to carful about everything and restrictive with all aspects of life.

Anonymous | 4:05 p.m. June 3, 2009

sad: No more fairwells, no goodbye and the airport, no MTC experience.

cluezo | 4:26 p.m. June 3, 2009

hey california steve whats your point?

Re: That's too bad | 4:27 p.m. June 3, 2009

I can understand what you said too. The MTC Spirit is a very special spirit, and a choice experience for an investigator to have.

But there are many other places you can take an investigator to feel the Spirit--for example, where possible you can invite them to a family home evening, a Church fireside, or a Church activity.

You can also invite them to attend a temple open house (i.e. Oquirrh Mountain Temple) or to visit the temple grounds. You don't have to go inside the temple to feel the Spirit. It is right there when you walk on the grounds.

There are also settings in church where one can feel the Spirit, too.

The MTC experience may not be there, but there are still many wonderful and choice experiences that investigators can have.

I highly doubt that anyone is going to say that because they can't enter the MTC to get a confirmation by the Spirit that they aren't going to join the Church.

If they did, I'm pretty certain that the MTC would be happy to assist in arranging something for that situation (wink, wink)...

well | 4:35 p.m. June 3, 2009

gotta love them parents for being obedient though. better to be safe than sorry...

katamb | 4:39 p.m. June 3, 2009

Having no children to go on missions, I miss the Sacrament meeting farewells, just to hear their story about deciding to go on a mission. Miss the homecomings too and the talks about their missions. It is a big deal. How many future missionaries are not being inspired to go? But I know there's a reason for it.

Senior Missionary in Peru | 4:45 p.m. June 3, 2009

No more farewells ... but families can have farewells in their own homes rather than converting sacrament meeting into a family reunion.

No more goodbye at the airport ... but then those who lived far from SLC didn't have that luxury either.

No MTC experience ... but, but, this one IS sad. Needed, but sad.

My wife and I asked our seven kids and 17 grandkids to see us off, bid farewell, have a family devotional the days or weeks before we left for Peru. It worked out fine.

2 CA missionaries | 6:18 p.m. June 3, 2009

We have just sent off 2 missionaries, a daughter we took to the Provo MTC in January and a son just 2 weeks ago from the very small airport in Modesto CA to enter the Brazil MTC. The MTC experience was a wonderful experience, but the small airport was just as wonderful. There is no need to go to an MTC to feel the missionary spirit, we felt it in a tiny municipal airport in CA.

Anonymous | 6:48 p.m. June 3, 2009

Iu also remember Pres. Boone telling an audience that it was like ripping off a bandaid--say your goodbyes quickly and leave and it will hurt less than dragging it out. Having been a missionary who walked through the door and having been a parent who wathched my son walk through the door, It's harder to be the parent. The missionary is ready, the parents arent.

Anonymous | 6:54 p.m. June 3, 2009

I think that person who made the illegal alien comment must have been thinking of how the church is currently being scrutinized for knowingly sending out an illegal alien missionary in the states.

anonymous | 7:17 p.m. June 3, 2009

I know this was really hard for a lot of people. I had shed some tears this last weekend because I wasn't able to accompany my son to the MTC for the anticipated meeting (we live several thousand miles away, etc.). But then I remembered when I went to the MTC as a missionary. I was just eager to go. The meeting honestly didn't mean a lot to me. Any place my family said goodbye would have been fine, I think. Thinking about things from the missionary's point of view helps. It is his/her mission after all. :)

Rip it good! | 7:37 p.m. June 3, 2009

Sad day for the new missionary's last moments with family to be outside and quick, just like a airport drop-off, but hey! Someone had to take control of a pandemic possibility. The new missionaries will definitely be taken care of just fine.

As President Boone said - The band-aid has to come off sometime. Rip it good!

Been There, Done That | 7:46 p.m. June 3, 2009

"Anonymous | 1:48 p.m. June 3, 2009
Sure, being tough on illegal immigration breaks up families... but THIS DOESN'T????"

In the short term, yep.

In the long term, meaning the portion of life beyond death, NOPE!

Hope you get rid of your short-sightedness.

Baton Rouge, Louisiana Mission
8 November 1984 - 13 November 1986

I Remember It Well | 7:51 p.m. June 3, 2009

I remember that part of the MTC experience well.

Went through it with 2 older brothers (served in Kobe, Japan mission and the Seattle, WA missions) as well as a buddy who served in West Virginia.

The MTC President would welcome everyone and would speak for awhile and then at some point he'd say "Moms and dads and family, you go that way, (and then pointing through some doors in the opposite direction) Elders and Sisters, you go that way".

After some hugs and kisses, off we all went.

One of the VERY BEST decisions I ever made was to serve.

I was involved in 20 conversions over 2 years.

19 "non-members" and me.

The caravan moves on!

Still bleeding | 8:53 p.m. June 3, 2009

I dropped my son off today. He is my second son to go on a mission. This good-bye was brutally quick and certainly not painless. Be aware if you want to do any lingering, do it before you get to the curb.

Kyle | 1:43 a.m. June 4, 2009

Elders watch out for that horrible "swine" flu. You might feel a little sick. What a joke I can't believe the church bought into the hysteria...ridiculous!

Charlie | 6:41 a.m. June 4, 2009

We didn't have nor did we want the 'luxury' of the Utah experience when our son went on his mission. We said our 'goobye for now' at our local airport and told him we were HAPPY he was making his own choice to serve and that we support him and love him.

All of the hooplah that is given in Utah isn't so much a display of love as it is a display of helicopter parenting brought on by traditions that are outdated or SHOULD be...

These young men, young women and senior couples NEED the dignity of having a private family gathering for their goodbye and the dignity of an MTC experience without the overzealous family members hanging onto their ankles crying about how long they will be gone.

Time to cut the apron strings...

Painful | 6:54 a.m. June 4, 2009

If you think it is painful to drop off a child to serve a mission, try the pain of having a child who does not serve. You get to sit through all of their friend's farewells and homecomings and share the other family's experience, while knowing your child is missing out. Enjoy the pain of sending your child to serve. It may be bitter momentarily, but sweet forever.

disillusioned | 7:02 a.m. June 4, 2009

You know, the original LDS missionaries didn't have anything...including farewells, MTCs, or money. Buck up people!

UKMM | 7:31 a.m. June 4, 2009

Remember it's only the 'priveleged' few who get this MTC experience anyway. Some live to far away to accompany their sons or daughters to the MTC. Our farewell was at an airport in the UK, and then he had to make the journey to Provo without any family member, friend or even and 'fellow missionaries'. It's great to have a Missionary serving whatever the farewell circumstances are.

Perspective | 7:33 a.m. June 4, 2009

Be grateful you have children going on missions, we have two sons who chose NOT to go on a mission. Now, THAT is painful!

Marianne | 7:34 a.m. June 4, 2009

I have had five sons go on missions, the last one to Brazil. The first four I accompanied to the MTC. I am very grateful I had the opportunity to go into the MTC and feel the Spirit. There are not many places that the Spirit can be felt almost immediately as felt in the MTC. It also has been a big testimony building experience and given me great strength each time I have entered. I am sorry for those that can't go in and have the same experience. But, I suppose, what you do know, you don't miss and we will all get used to it; just as we did of not going to the airport after the MTC and seeing them off.

Marc | 7:47 a.m. June 4, 2009

Missionary work is a wonderful experience and this is a special time for everyone.

I remember going to the "Mission Home" in SLC and then going to the "LTM" in Provo before heading out to Northern Italy. My single Mother in Oklahoma couldn't come to see me off and it was a bit of a growing experience. I have fond memories of that time (1973) and appreciate the wisdom of the brethren in doing the things they do.

This is a wonderful time.

There's no need in this forum to write spitefully or in an angry tone. It amazes me the things that cause others to get upset.

This Is Great!! | 8:10 a.m. June 4, 2009

Sorry, but after accompanying two sons to the MTC and it's positively wonderful, absolutely agonizing MTC "two-doors" experience, I fully support the drop-off policy.

It gets to the point where it's just time to get on with it -- to get the missionary up and going, out of the house, away from family and friends, etc.

Give 'em a hug and say, "God Bless!"

Matthew | 8:20 a.m. June 4, 2009

Some missionaries don't have family to drop them off. Some don't have parents to drop them off. The upside to this is that the contrast will seem a little less stark to those missionaries coming from less "traditional" family support systems. Every cloud has a silver lining.

Kay | 8:25 a.m. June 4, 2009

We didn't get to go to the MTC but took our son to the Kansas City airport. I watched as the mantle physically fell upon him as he turned from us, stood a little straighter and immediately started talking to the security guards about his mission. No amount of talks and hymns could match the true meaning of his mission being played out in front of us. We did get to pick him up in Toulouse, France and again watched as the last remaining minutes of his mission were spent talking to people on the train about the gospel. These missions are not about us - it's about the work.

CA Father | 8:40 a.m. June 4, 2009

The answer is to send the young men when they are 16. At that age they know everything and Mom won't cry one bit.

Just kidding!

Mona | 8:46 a.m. June 4, 2009

I enjoyed the MTC experience with our son, but the reality is that few outside of Utah are able to travel there w/ their missionary. I have heard stories from friends about taking their entire family at great expense to Provo to be w/ their missionary just one more day before they depart, and how the siblings screamed and cried and made a scene and ran after the missionary. Sheesh, no wonder a change was in order.

4 sons/1daughter | 9:10 a.m. June 4, 2009

Having done the MTC on 4 previous occasions (Tennessee, So. Korea, California, and Kentucky), I was first almost heartbroken with this decision. After thinking about it and remembering who is REALLY in charge (& talking with my returned missionaries), I think the curbside drop off is going to be just fine. The family gatherings can be done before hand and maybe I won't drive away from the MTC a total mess. I will be sending my 5th off in 3 weeks to Michigan. He went to the other MTC send-offs and is just fine with this change. At least he had participated in the 'traditional' MTC experiences, so he knows what he will/won't be missing. He's just excited to be going out to serve the Lord. True, Utahns (& those closeby) were the only ones to get the 'old' opportunity. As for the airport, that only happened with our first 3. Much better experience there (not so emotionally draining and much 'lighter' atmosphere). After reading some of the comments, I feel more blessed to have had the MTC experience and look forward to this new one.

Anon | 9:21 a.m. June 4, 2009

The MTC was probably the lowest part of my missionary experience. Good to have it over with ASAP.

Flu | 9:29 a.m. June 4, 2009

Kyle - my daughter teaches at the MTC and there is an elder in the district she teaches who has a confirmed case of flu, so all of the missionaries and the teachers in that district are on anti-viral medication. My daughter is now sick also, and that's with taking the no-handshaking precautions. In such close quarters things are spread very quickly, and when missionaries are sick, they can't study or do their work. When missionaries are delayed, it can create problems with not enough teachers, classrooms, etc., for the new missionaries coming in. I'm sure no one is concerned about deaths from the swine flu, just the problems that come from so many people being sick at the same time.

Kyle | 1:43 a.m. June 4, 2009

Elders watch out for that horrible "swine" flu. You might feel a little sick. What a joke I can't believe the church bought into the hysteria...ridiculous!

Julie C. | 9:39 a.m. June 4, 2009

Having a son in the mission field is truly an anazing experience. My husband and I were able to fly to Utah to go the MTC with him. As much as I loved it, it was so very hard. I couldn't sing one word of "Called to Serve"! I have never been prouder of my son, who quickly hugged his dad, gave me a little longer hug, and then was off. He never looked back. While I was happy to see a little bit of the MTC, I witnessed one elder in agony when his family wouldn't let him go. It was hard to watch. I think the curb-side dropoff is kinder! Let them get going - they are ready. Parents never are :)

It's okay | 9:58 a.m. June 4, 2009

I said my goodbye to my family at the line for the security-screening of the SLC airport on my way to Brazil. It was tough, but it was so quick that I didn't have time to count-down the minutes with ever-increasing dread. I think this is a good move. I thought my experience made the transition easier for me.

Anti-PC Infidel | 10:10 a.m. June 4, 2009

Why would any adult have a problem with this? These are supposed to be adults that we're dropping off, not little kids. If our sons haven't become independent and responsible and fully able to take care of themselves by the time they're 19, then we need to ground our helicopters and get out of our kids' way.

Amy | 10:33 a.m. June 4, 2009

I'm glad my son is only 8. I think this decision is stupid. I mean if my son is going to be gone for 2 years I should at least get some nice last moments with him and see a little bit of the MTC with him so I can share that experience and maybe by feeling the spirit of the speaker & singing some hymns would make me feel better.
I mean, my gosh I had him in my belly for 9 months, and they'll always be your baby, I refuse to just say "well, goodbye son" and then leave quickly. My anxiety just can't take that.

happytobeme | 11:09 a.m. June 4, 2009

I think this is a wonderful and wise change! I left for the MTC from the DC area and said most of my goodbyes at the house and then my mom's at the airport. The worst part of the experience was having to sit all alone through the MTC program. It was personally difficult and awkward watching everyone else be with their loved ones. When it ended I was eager to be the first one through the door and get on with things.

Missionary Dad | 11:12 a.m. June 4, 2009

Wow! A lot of criticism directed at Utah natives and missionary parents along the lines of "buck up!" Probably most given by people who weren't there yesterday.

We get it. This is the church, and we need to be tough. But, thanks for pointing this all out anyway, so we know that you know too. :)

As the article points out some "tweaks" can, and will, be made. Yesterday's experience wasn't typical of a church-run production. The volunteers were a little flustered and made some insensitive comments. There was a little confusion in some instances. It was a little more like a Scout Camp drop off than a sacred goodbye.

(I'm sure that even the airport goodbyes aren't a dropoff at the curb with the baggage guy saying, "Keep it moving.")

They'll get it right. But yesterday, wasn't quite the final production I think they were hoping for.

We're still "bucking up" though and are happy to have another son serving!

@Amy (10:33am) | 11:21 a.m. June 4, 2009

If you're that anxious about it, maybe you shouldn't let him even leave the nest...

Re: Kyle | 11:24 a.m. June 4, 2009

Did you know that the "normal" flu kills some 30,000 to 40,000 Americans in an average year?

The fact this new strain of H1N1 influenza has been less severe than initially thought doesn't mean the Church is "paranoid" by taking these precautions.

Missionaries from all over the world enter the MTC, and from there they go to all points on the globe; for the flu virus it's the perfect opportunity to spread itself. A large outbreak in the MTC would require the Church to quarantine the entire facility and would seriously hamper the missionary program for weeks, if not months.

Not to mention the damage to the Church's reputation if their missionaries were found to be responsible for starting a swine flu outbreak in some other country.

In my opinion, the Public Health establishment has been a little too successful in their efforts to stamp out communicable diseases. The lack of large-scale pandemics of deadly diseases has bred complacency among Americans to the point that it makes us more vulnerable to outbreaks because too few people believe it could happen to them.

Pam | 11:31 a.m. June 4, 2009

The Church is true - period! I am thankful for the MTC and inspired leaders who are trying to protect the missionaries! By the way, I have 2 missionaries serving right now; one in the MTC, and one in his last month!

Kathy | 11:45 a.m. June 4, 2009

I feel very happy for all the new missionaries entering in to the MTC and getting the oppty to even so much as have a face to face good bye with a few family members. I was dropped off at the MTC in July of 1979 by a local citizen to begin learning the ropes of serving a mission to Rome, Italy. No hug. No nothing. It was sure heart wrenching for me to see all the other missionaries at that big "family" meeing saying so long to their loved ones. I had no one.

Now it seems, that everyone will simply get a fast good bye. That does seem to me (even though the reason is Swine flu) that now no one will need to feel "left out" because one's own family members couldn't be bothered with seeing someone for the last time for over a year and a half or two year missionary experience. Like "happy to be me" I too, was grateful when all the good byes were said and then all missionaries were then on equal ground...loved ones were gone. The missionary experience could finally begin.

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9 photos

Stuart Johnson, Deseret News

A busy but fast moving day for families of missionaries to drop them off and say their goodbyes on the curb at the MTC in Provo. Wednesday was the first day with the new policy.

Gallery (9 photos)