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Utah friendly, study says

The problem with studies where people are self-reporting is that in a place like Utah, for example, people are going to report how they think they ought to be, not how they really are. Especially with a dominant religious culture constantly preaching to a large percentage of the population about how they ought to be.

I've lived in NYC, Portland, Chicago, Norway, Australia and Utah. I find Utahns to be the least friendly, even though I grew up here. Australians and New Yorkers are the most friendly (despite NYC's reputation as being unfriendly).

Here it comes - all the "Mormons are jerks" diatribe that usually accompanies articles that describe Utahns in a positive light. And although Mormons were not brought up in this article, someone soon will post something "revealing" about Mormons that shows how Utahns (Mormons) really are not good people.

I lived in the South for awhile and found southerners quite friendly, especially Texans. If you didn't grow up in Utah and move here, the closeness of the neighborhoods will make you feel excluded, even if you are LDS.

The problem with anecdotal reports, Stenar, is that they are just that: one person's one-time experience, not an actual study with any kind of legitimate population to draw from or make generalizations about. Keep your anecdotes to yourself, especially when they're mean-spirited.

The problem with this study is that Utahns who are not members of the dominant religion will self-report that they are superior to others. I've lived in New York, Japan and Hawaii and have spent a great deal of time in Mexico and have visited 40 states. Except for Alabama, Kansas and Nebraska, no place has had more friendly people than Utah. That's despite the judgmental, biased and negative treatment that people who are not members of the dominant religion dish out to citizens who are suspected of not falling into that same class.

I've lived in DC., Virginia, and among NY retirees in South Carolina. New Yorkers were the very LEAST friendly (maybe it's just retirees). Cranky, onery, willing to complaint to anyone listening, especially if they had to wait more than 30 seconds in a grocery store line. Smiling back at them seemed to aggravate them even more.

Having come back to Utah, I've discovered no area I've lived in is more kind and thoughtful to children and families. The east coast is developing an attitude of merely tolerating children. At least Utah still recognizes kids are humans to love.

Of course, NO generalization will cover EVERY community, so everyone will have different experiences.

I grew up in Utah, then I was stationed in the L.A. area. I couldn't believe how many rude people and rude drivers were in the L.A. area. I couldn't wait to get back home to nice people and courteous drivers. Just before returning to Utah I noticed some billboards that read "UTAH, Close, Low cost living and Low unemployment. Learn how to successfully move out of California". Then all these "Real Estate Refugee's" moved to Utah and they brought their California rudeness with them. Now Utah takes the rap for the California retreads.

I actually think people are more friendly in DC, at least more willing to say hello or return a greeting. Customer service is horrible back there, but I was much more comfortable saying hi to strangers there. And no, I'm not saying anything about the religious culture or anything, just the people in general.

You've "Lived" in a lot of places. How many years did you live in each place. You're Right! I just hate waking up to EVERY radio station broadcasting the "Mormons". Then my boss makes us say prayers before we start to work and he refers to us as "Bro or Sis". I'd give anything to get away from such a good influence. Really now, how many times are you fed with the dominant religion? I think it's all in people's heads. I think the "stigma" is brought on by peiople like you and you don't want to admit it. Like they all say, "If you don't like it, leave it" but you will find that the dominant religion in most areas WILL be the Mormon Church. Look at a phone book if you don't believe me. Especially in the West.

RE: Wait for it.... wait for it

If the shoe fits.....

"That's despite the judgmental, biased and negative treatment that people who are not members of the dominant religion dish out to citizens who are suspected of not falling into that same class."
Is there a mirror piece in that for you?

I posted earlier, and it hasn't shown up so I'll try again. I actually think that people in DC are more friendly than Utahns. And I'm not saying anything about religious culture or anything like that. I just felt that I was respected more while living and working back there by everyday people than I am here. It was far more common for me to get a hello back or something similar there than here. Customer service back there is a joke, but thats different than an overall friendliness. It may have been that it was all tourists I ran into, but I don't know many tourists who carry briefcases and wear suits in the business districts of downtown DC. And Rich, I don't think you could have encountered enough people in each state to make such a generalization, just my opinion though.

The first "poor us, we're disliked cause we're Mormon" post. No whether your Mormon or not, if you're not honest about who you really are, that's the issue.

Did the people doing this "study" drive our roads?

NYC is worse, but that is the only place where drivers are more inconsiderate then Utah.

If you really want to "experience the worst" try riding a bike here, seems you are a second class citizen for daring to try and share the road.

I want to know which state was most neurotic.

I really think it comes down to attitude. If you want to find nice people and you're nice to others yourself you WILL find aggreeable people wherever you go. Wonderful people are EVERYWHERE! I lived in Hungary, which is a place where people are generally perceived as cold and closed-off. However, once I got to know a lot of Hungarians, I discovered they are the friendliest, most hospitable people on earth. There will obviously also be some unkind people wherever you go. So can't we just focus on the good and give people the benefit of the doubt? I don't mean to sound preachy, I'm just opinionated like everyone else.

No surprise that the state is considered friendly. Having lived in CA, AZ, UT, ID, CO, and NV, I would say that the sentiment is accurate. I found that most of the people in the less populated western states are very friendly.

Having spent time in OR, TX, MT, DC, NY, WY, OH, and GA, it is difficult to compare people from those areas as I only encountered a small sampling in each state. All seemed friendly enough. I noticed that some appear less willing to converse or be involved (perhaps distrust?).

I would have to agree to disagree with the statement that people in Utah are friendly. I have from my experience living in the beehive State: seen more Skin Heads, Rednecks, white supremacists�, and white men who shave their heads! I being Mormon found Utah Mormons very different than California Mormons. I also found a lot of hypocrites who say one thing and then do another. Just what I observed in the 18 months I lived in Utah.

The problem with the report, is that every Mormon (me included) is at the core, very mean. We are taught in church to be sure to exclude those who may look or act differently than us. It is a good thing that this study polled mostly Non-Mormons. If they talked to any of us, the study would have ranked us dead last. The very first question I ask new people, �Yous a Mormon?� Their response determines my behavior. Simple solution, you want to be treated nice, join us, if not, move out. Praise and hallelujah, I am so glad that I am part of a religion that loves to exclude potential converts. We sure as heck don�t want to waste our time going out and witnessing to a bunch of Non-Mormons like Jehovah Witnesses. Our missionary program is actually a multi level vitamin business.

All this might be true, but I have a hard time reconciling it with the fact that this state has the rudest, most selfish drivers I've ever encountered. And I've lived in NY and CA. Why doesn't the friendliness and agreeableness alleged in this survey extend to what Utahns do on the road? I belong to the dominant faith and a favorite saying in my family is that the people here want to love you on Sunday and then get in their cars on Monday morning and try to kill you. I think if the kindness was really more than surface deep, it would be reflected a little more than it is in the way people interact with other drivers on Utah roads.