Comments about ‘Conference explores unique challenges of gay Mormons’

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Published: Saturday, Nov. 5 2011 11:17 p.m. MDT

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Vince here
San Diego, CA

@ Mike Richards,

It is easier to pass comment, pass judgment, tell someone else what to do, than it is to walk in their shoes.

If I knew that some part of what you say, from a religious point of view, I would agree. However, I cannot agree.

The gospel is for EVERYONE. Any part of the gospel - or rather, people's interpretation of it, that would cause others to draw some to feel ostracized, I believe, counters the purpose of the Savior who said "Come unto me."

So often, gays have been told, assimilate, meaning, act, behave like a heterosexual - suppress your identity - (but they call it temptation). Typically they suggest counseling or therapy.

What is the effect of that? Typically depression. Is the gospel of Christ meant to send people spiriling into depression. Not my Savior's gospel because he said, "I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more cabundantly."

You seem to be equating gay identity with other appetites of the flesh, if you will --- and I believe the more you do that, the more counterproductive you will be. Choose to draw people to Christ, gay or not.

Kith
HUNTINGTON BEACH, CA

This has been a large issue for me. I'm straight, but many if not most of my close friends are gay. And I worry about them, severely, and almost every day. If another LDS would correct me if I am wrong, or clarify, I would appreciate it. It is my understanding that a sin is not hurtful because it is a sin, it is a sin because it is hurtful. In the end, IT WILL make you unhappy. Our Father as well as our saviour love us all far more than we can conprehend. They are omniscient, or all knowing. They understand perfectly what will make us happy and what will not. And Christ will not stand Idly by while we harm ourselves without reaching out in some way. That is this gospel, His church. That is why we do not approve of homosexual behavior. And that is why I worry.

RanchHand
Huntsville, UT

Keith43 says:

"My counsel, as weak and inadequate as it may be, is that you separate yourself as best you can, from everyone and everything that encourages the lifestyle. Counsel often with those who have experience and success with helping others overcome this problem."

---
Avoidance doesn't change anything. I was an active Mormon, RM, celibate, virgin for 30+ years. Every. Single. Day. of my life was horrible. Every. Single. Day.

You can't stop the feelings/attractions just because you don't hang out with those who "encourage the lifestyle". I became a hermit essentially, because just being around others (heterosexuals) who had SOMEONE else to love, was painful knowing that I couldn't have someone to share my own life with. Someone I was attracted to. That is no kind of life.

And for the record, it isn't a "problem". You see, you calling it a "problem" only adds to the self-hate that we are encouraged to feel.

@seer;

We don't just "convert" to being gay. We ARE that way naturally.

Baccus0902
Leesburg, VA

@ Kith 2:11

If you have friends who are gay or heterosexuals you should worry about them because they are your friends and you love them.

We always worry about those who we love.

What many many good intentioned LDS and other don't understand is that being gay is not a problem, it shouldn't even be an issue.

Gays don't have the problem. Some heterosexuals have the problem! Some because they see it as disgusting. Other have a conflict with their religious up bringing, etc. you know how it goes by now (always the same tired arguments).

As RanchHand said, the repression of who you are, the belief that is something wrong with you, those around you are the ones who make you feel horrible.

Gays are children of God. Loved by God. Accepted by god and MADE by God.

Kith continue worrying for your friends but also be happy for them. If they feel the freedom to confide on you is because they see you as a friend as well.

There is no sin in loving somebody of the same sex. The sin and what is hurtful here is making LGBT lives unbearable because they are different.

RanchHand
Huntsville, UT

@Mike Richards;

Leaving the "friends" in the LDS Church was the best thing that ever happened to me. Until I did that, I was extremely miserable. The Church was the cause of that misery, thank you very much.

@Max;

Marriage is ALWAYS an option for heterosexuals. Just because some *choose* not to enter into the contract doesn't mean that they can't. Aspen1713 said it correctly.

@Utah Girl;

I would hate to be your son.

@I M LDS 2;

Thank you.

The Rock says;

"We are also told that God will prepare a way for us to escape temptations when they come."
---
You know, I've never felt that being gay was a "temptation". The "tempttion" for me was to try and be heterosexual. And God did provide the way for me to overcome it - its called "self acceptance".

@O'really;

No, you don't get it. I don't define myself primarily by my sexual attractions. That is only ONE aspect of how I define myself. If you define yourself solely by your sexual attraction (hetero) then, actually, I pity you because you are missing out on so much in life.

RanchHand
Huntsville, UT

@cjf;

Just because they're living the expected LDS lifestyle doesn't mean they're happy. They might just be ultra miserable and putting on a happy face because that is what is expected. I know, because that is how I lived my own life.

@@Charles;

Assuming, of course, that there actually IS a god and that those "passing down the information" to you aren't simply leading you on.

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