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The tragedy of the 'kidnapped bride'
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Kay | 6:35 p.m. Nov. 29, 2007
Let us all take a lesson from the Amish - forgive and move on with your lives.
Life is too short.
A Dad With Grown Children | 6:56 p.m. Nov. 29, 2007
I believe the following quotation is appropriate for consideration by the
Redd's and others who tend to be very controlling: "God grant me the
serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change those
things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference - Reinhold Niebuhr
1892-1971." The key here is "...having the wisdom..."
Comments continue below
The Truth | 7:03 p.m. Nov. 29, 2007
We don't know the whole truth, but to go on national TV to air their
bitterness has absolutely nothing to do with Christ or charity. It is revenge
pure and simple and continues to be pushed into the limelight. Bitterness is
all I see in this whole story.
Bronco girl | 7:28 p.m. Nov. 29, 2007
I was controlled by someone in my life, so at 18 I married a man I thought I
loved and would save me. He was controlling too but in my youth and
inexperience, I took it for love and caring. Long story short, it ended in
divorce and heartache. I really disagree with the Redds method, but I wish my
parents had tried harder to intervene. Who knows what the outcome will be with
this . . . But it is said Juliana's then fiance wanted her to embellish her
story to really sock it to her parents. Who knows what is really true? I think
you all would be surprised at the whole truth. The court record is public
record. Check it out, I promise, you will see there truly are two sides to
every story. Fault lies everywhere. Blame is everywhere. You can read the
court record/transcripts and be enlighted! I disagree with all of them. All
made really sad/bad choices. I see still a lot of heartache for all of them
ahead. Forgiveness is healing!
give me a break | 7:34 p.m. Nov. 29, 2007
What if her husband had kidnapped her to prevent her from seeing her parents?
Would that be okay? Noooo. Wake up people and realize some relationships are
toxic and the best solution is to put an end to it. Do you need to forgive
them? Of course. Do you need to have a relationship with them? Absolutely
not. A rape victim does need to forgive her attacker so she can fully heal, but
it does not mean she needs to visit him in prison. Too many people have a
warped perception of what forgivness is. It's letting the incident go and
moving on with your life. If a woman is abused by her husband and she has the
courage to divorce him, should she be required to invite him to Thanksgiving?
No. She can never speak to him again if she so chooses and it doesn't mean
she hasn't or won't forgive him. Same rules apply for parent child
relationships. The Myers may very well be excellent parents with close and
loving relationships with their kids because they will vow not to repeat the
mistakes of her parents. History doesn't have to repeat itself.
wow | 8:06 p.m. Nov. 29, 2007
This is ridiculous. Forgive and forget and move on. Everyone will be happier
maybelle | 8:35 p.m. Nov. 29, 2007
I would agree that the Redds made a hugh mistake when they took their daughter
to Colorado. However, I have a big problem with a daughter and her husband who
can hold a grudge for over a year. I think family problems should be worked out
in families and not in a courtroom.
Perry wouldn't be welcome in my family either.
Perry wouldn't be welcome in my family either.
Glennamaddy | 10:48 p.m. Nov. 29, 2007
In regard to Steve's comment, "Lemuel" is a traditional name in
the Redd family, extending back before the family's conversion to Mormonism
in 1843. It's a name found in the Bible (Proverbs 31) and means
"belonging to God" in Hebrew.
uniques | 12:47 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
this is the stuff that makes utah unique we have stories like this from time to
time. some of them do get the this much media attention like this one but all
have heard and seem some of this behavior in the name " you name it "
Anonymous | 6:24 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
You know when I was engaged to an individual, I was told by my father that he
would do everything he could before I was married to keep me from making a
choice he thought was wrong but afterwards he would be loving and accepting if I
chose to continue with it.
He convinced me, I saw his point and didn't marry him. I think that is what her loving parents were doing. I think it is ludicrous that their daughter is so vindictive about this.
Denice
He convinced me, I saw his point and didn't marry him. I think that is what her loving parents were doing. I think it is ludicrous that their daughter is so vindictive about this.
Denice
Reality TV | 7:27 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
What is next? Just think of it, this will probably make them all rich with a
reality TV show!
Mom in Mo | 8:30 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
Under the "this will get me banned" headline, the name Lemuel is
compared with Hitler or Osama. Please consider that Noah was a good guy in the
Bible and and a bad guy in the B of M. Names don't mean a hoot, unless you
attatch something to it yourself.
willie | 8:47 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
where is all of this "free agency" stuff I hear so much about, and
that caveat against "unrighteous dominion."
Worried for Julianna | 9:02 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
Yup Reality TV, as soon as I see a TV movie or book, my suspicions about Perry
Myers will be confirmed. While I do think the Redd parents went too far,
something about Perry has bothered me from the beginning.
K | 9:14 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
I totally agree with Guaglione and others. I think we haven't heard the
whole story. What is sad is that now there's a baby involved. Wish they
could all 'fast-forward' a few years. I think the truth will come
out, and I don't think it will be good.
get a life | 9:17 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
Channel 4 said that Perry and Juliana are being silent because they have a book
deal in the works. As I have watch this for the past year, at first I
couldn�t believe that these parent could do this do there
daughter. And I still think that what they did was very wrong and they got the
punishment that they deserved. But, I have watch Perry and Juliana and have seen
nothing but hatred and bitterness in them. I see this book if it is true, doing
them more harm to them. Are they doing this for Money? What. Please let us know.
I for one would never read such a book, get on with your life, get this
bitterness out of you both. Forgive and forget.
Book Deal? | 10:03 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
What more is there to write? I think I have already read the book in the
countless stories on this sad affair. Will the book be more than 2 pages?
"So I was supposed to get married to Perry. My parents picked me up, and drove me to Colorado instead of the wedding dinner. It really ticked me off becasue I missed my wedding date. But fortunately, I got married two days later and my parents have been convicted. The end."
"So I was supposed to get married to Perry. My parents picked me up, and drove me to Colorado instead of the wedding dinner. It really ticked me off becasue I missed my wedding date. But fortunately, I got married two days later and my parents have been convicted. The end."
embarassed for utah | 11:58 a.m. Nov. 30, 2007
what in the world does this story even have to do with what most of you refer to
as "THE CHURCH"???
this is why people outside of utah, LAUGH at utah.
this is our news, people???
why are so many of you concerned about this?
who cares?
GET OVER IT!
this is why people outside of utah, LAUGH at utah.
this is our news, people???
why are so many of you concerned about this?
who cares?
GET OVER IT!
lockel | 12:42 p.m. Nov. 30, 2007
Everyone here on this blog needs to remember that we should not judge the
families involved because we are not their judge or jury. This family is going
to need time to heal. For the daughter I wish the best but remember you only
have one mother and father and they probably were there for you thru other
troubling times. They love you and want the best for you (whether temple
marriage or civil) They thought that they did not have any recourse but to do
what they did. You are in my prayers and I hope that you can reconcile with
your mother. After all she has been there when you really need her and when she
is gone you will miss the time that you are prohibiting them from. Besides
FAMILIES ARE FPREVER and you are still a part of theirs. Do not deprive them
from their precious grandchildren. Your husband on the other hand needs to show
and unfortunately prove to your parents that he will take care of you
Physically, Mentally and Spiritually. Make up with your parents, they wont be
around forever.
political career | 12:52 p.m. Nov. 30, 2007
A book deal?
No wonder they were on so many national TV shows.
This is about money.
This is about Perry and his political career.
Please give it up. Hang it up.
no one would vote for you.
We are sick of it.
No wonder they were on so many national TV shows.
This is about money.
This is about Perry and his political career.
Please give it up. Hang it up.
no one would vote for you.
We are sick of it.
AS | 2:38 p.m. Nov. 30, 2007
Kudos to "this will get me banned", you made me laugh!! So true :)
Jimmy | 2:55 p.m. Nov. 30, 2007
A Mother in Law can either be a huge blessing or a terrible curse. Looks like
Perry got the curse. Maybe he deserved it, maybe he didn't. Parents do
need to realize that at some point their kids need to be allowed to make their
own mistakes even if they end in divorce.
Relocated Southerner | 4:55 p.m. Nov. 30, 2007
I think I would do almost anything to keep my children from marrying someone I
thought may be abusive, verbally or physically. But I would never
"kidnap" my own child to keep him/her from marrying someone unless I
thought this other person was going to KILL them! From what I've read in
these posts, these parents (especially the mother) has a history of trying to
control her children and their choice of a spouse. There also comes a time when
you have to step back and let them make their own choices. I would suspect
there is truth on both sides of this argument, and since the daughter left her
parents' home to go directly into marriage, it is highly likely that she
has repeated the pattern -- left one controlling relationship for another -- and
only time will tell that, of course. I think this is a sad story all the way
around, and I hate that there is a child/grandchild involved now because I think
there are issues with everyone in this whole saga.
Janey | 12:05 a.m. Dec. 1, 2007
I am really getting tired of this story in my face even when I try to ignore it.
The bottom line to me is that the majority think that poor little Julianna was
so badly mistreated. What I see is a mom and dad who were so worried about
their darling marrying a controlling freak that they tried to do something about
it. I saw this Perry guy sitting in court and the smug look on his face told
volumes. And just because a person can get a temple marriage does not make
him/her an automatic righteous being. Julianna needs to see through her
adoration of this Perry guy and remember that any mom or dad who expects quality
things for their daughter can be twisted into being controlling. I wonder how
afraid she is of showing love or forgiveness to the two people in her life who
did everything for her. Let's see if Perry guy can endure as long as 20
years.
katydid | 12:52 a.m. Dec. 1, 2007
I totally agree that the parents should not have done what they did. But I also
agree that what the daughter and son-in-law did was wrong too. (I really think
the son-in-law influenced the daughter--his wife now--toward filing kidnapping
charges because he was mad.) My mother is a controlling person and she tried to
prevent me from marrying someone I shouldn't have married. But I learned
from the experience, divorced and now happily married to someone else. But I
certainly would NEVER think of filing kidnapping charges against my own parents
if they had done something like that to me. There are other, more mature and
less drastic ways of dealing with things besides "teaching your parents a
lesson" by trying to send them to jail. Good luck to all of them!
Not Judging | 1:58 p.m. Dec. 2, 2007
Too bad this didn't go to trial so the truth could have been discovered.
However, because of the way our courts have evolved, it is questionable if the
truth would have been discovered. I know the Redds, my children went to school
with their children, Julia is controlling but she is also very loving and a good
judge of character. Even though she didn't remember her daughter has the
right to choose, if she was uncomfortable with the marriage, I would have been
too but I would have dealt differently with the situation. To show my
disapproval, I would not have given a single dime to make the marriage happen
but would have left all expenses to the bride and groom. I would have attended
the marriage, unless my daughter told me not to, so she would know I loved her
and supported her even if I didn't agree with her decision. The door has
to be left open so she can change her mind if she needs to at a future date. I
would have to leave my mind open just in case I had been wrong about her choice.
It is very sad | 5:59 p.m. Dec. 2, 2007
For the families having to live with this over their heads! If I had been the
bride I would have waited to get married and tried to work things out. If it
was unworkable on her parents end I would have still gotten married, but after
things had "blown over." And it also would have been a good test of
the engagement. Now there will be this hanging over their heads for a long time
and this itself, may cause damage to the marriage and have unrepairable
relationships between the two families.
Been There Done That | 8:12 p.m. Dec. 2, 2007
It is very sad,
I understand that the bride didn't know she was going to be KIDNAPPED. The parents LIED to her and said they were taking her SHOPPING. Why are you blaming the victim? I have suffered through years of controlling in-laws. My FIL even called up our Bishop to make sure we were attending church and then LIED and denied that he did it. I guess he thought it was O.K. to do it since he was Bishop at the time. I'm not a drug dealer or anything like that. Some parents just will not give up control, because of course they always know best(in their own minds). I pity the groom. He has taken on something thAt has caused and will bring endless aggravation unless the in-laws completely admit their error and beg forgiveness(not likely in my opinion).
I don't "blame" the bride, | 8:42 p.m. Dec. 2, 2007
But it is very apparent from the story that the parents didn't intend to
"kidnap" her. They certainly need counseling (sounds like especially
the mother does). I don't condone what they did, but it was obviously not
intended to be what it turned out to be. There should have been a "cooling
down" period with counseling for all involved and the best effort given to
work this out. This has been all blown out of proportion!
BTDT | 9:03 p.m. Dec. 2, 2007
This has gone on and on because of the STUBBORNESS OF THE PARENTS.
katherine | 10:55 p.m. Dec. 2, 2007
We all have our own opinions based upon our own life experiences. We only know
what has happened regarding this case because of what the media (newspapers, TV,
etc.) has informed us of. Let the courts handle it since obviously the family
can't YET.
It will be interesting to see what happens down the road. We, as the public, may never know the results after some time has passed. Hopefully this family will be able to talk it out--not see eye to eye mind you--and come to some agreements so that better feelings will be between them. Agreements that all of them will be able to live with. But of course, that may never happen. Who knows. It will be up to the families. If they really want to, it will happen. They probably will need a mediator to get them together and work through this. Hearts on both sides need to be softened, otherwise it won't work. Right now, the hearts on both sides are hardened. That is sad. But time will tell.
It will be interesting to see what happens down the road. We, as the public, may never know the results after some time has passed. Hopefully this family will be able to talk it out--not see eye to eye mind you--and come to some agreements so that better feelings will be between them. Agreements that all of them will be able to live with. But of course, that may never happen. Who knows. It will be up to the families. If they really want to, it will happen. They probably will need a mediator to get them together and work through this. Hearts on both sides need to be softened, otherwise it won't work. Right now, the hearts on both sides are hardened. That is sad. But time will tell.
a thought | 11:02 p.m. Dec. 2, 2007
just a thought... with the media involved and emotions still high right now
with the family and everyone, I wonder how things will pan out after everything
and everyone cools down (in a few years).
but an end to this | 6:41 a.m. Dec. 3, 2007
I know Juliana and Perry and if this book deal is true, my respect for these two
have gone. I hear what they say to us that know her, things like I love my
mother and father and want them to get help. And yet she tells us in the same
breath that this is all about protecting Perry. And his career.
That�s great. Protect him by not writing a book. This will
only prove your real intentions, not to help your parents but to gain money and
power from this all. What�s more to write, the more I have
herd the story the worse you make it out to be. Put an end to this please.
ME-1 | 3:18 p.m. Dec. 3, 2007
These 2 kids got married in the temple.What more could a parent ask for.
The parents need more than counseling. They are extreme weirdos! If my kids were married in the temple I'd feel blessed. These 2 parents are not normal parents nor LDS. They look like they may be abusive to me. You cannot judge a person by the way they appear to others. Sometimes looks can be quite deceptive and their closets can also be filled with all kinds of skeletons.. They should be ashamed of themselves! They need to repent!
The parents need more than counseling. They are extreme weirdos! If my kids were married in the temple I'd feel blessed. These 2 parents are not normal parents nor LDS. They look like they may be abusive to me. You cannot judge a person by the way they appear to others. Sometimes looks can be quite deceptive and their closets can also be filled with all kinds of skeletons.. They should be ashamed of themselves! They need to repent!
Yes on the Book | 3:48 p.m. Dec. 3, 2007
Let them write a book. I'm sure that wasn't the plan originally. A
little cash will help heal the damage the parents have done viz. ruined wedding
day etc. I'll buy one to give to my inlaws.
Therapy | 8:29 p.m. Dec. 3, 2007
Actually it sounds like they all should be in therapy. Private and family. I
hope they all get it.
no on book | 11:52 p.m. Dec. 3, 2007
I agree with "but an end on this". How can writing a book on this
whole situation protect Perry? Protect him how? And if Juliana loved her
parents, how and why would a book deal help? No, I don't see that Juliana
and Perry really want to make things right with the parents at this time. They
just want the money. And for "yes on the book" how can writing a book
heal the damage the parents have done? Money won't heal--it can help their
bank account though.
Family member | 4:44 p.m. Dec. 5, 2007
As a member of the Redd Family I intimately understand the issue at hand. We
have always known that Julia has controlling issues to the point of acting out
and being violent with siblings and her own children. In years past we have
tried to get Julia under a doctors care, only to experience threatening
resistance from Julia. Most of us are pleased that Julia is finally getting
the professional help needs...for her safety and for the safety of others. We
are sincerely empathetic to Julianna and Perry who have been the victims of this
tragedy. We applaud Julianna and Perry for having the courage to see this
through.
One who knows.
One who knows.
THINK before you speak | 10:28 p.m. Dec. 5, 2007
I've known Perry Myers most of his life...he is a very kind and thoughtful
young man that most parents would be thrilled to have as a son-in-law. For
those of you making faults and irresponsible accusations about a young man you
know nothing about, I would ask that you start exercising some intelligence and
THINK before you speak.
Jerry J.
Jerry J.
Teresa | 4:59 p.m. Dec. 6, 2007
I'm sorry everybody...but I end up laughing every time this Mother gets on
TV and starts up her weeping and crying, weeping and crying monolog without
shedding a single tear. Ummm... you have to wonder???
Teresa
Teresa
no family member of ours | 9:31 a.m. Dec. 7, 2007
You are no family member of ours, (Redd family) we do not talk or write things
about other family members. We know there is a problem in the family but we work
things out in private not in the press. You must be from Julia side of the
family. We don�t act that way.
Can Identify | 9:33 a.m. Dec. 7, 2007
Boy can I identify. I also have had a very controlling mother. She only wanted
things her way, and there was never any talking to her. She never gave me any
positive acknowledgements, unless it was something I did specifically for her
benefit. She has chosen to try to alienate me from my father, my brothers,
other relatives and neighbors with half-truths and fabrications, generally
delivered in a sympathetic tone so that people would find her likable. Over 15
years ago, I had a very disturbing incident in which my mother tried to convince
our family that I had mental health issues. I was sorely tempted to break off
ties completely with my mother. I chose to maintain contact with my parents in
order to remain in contact with my father and with my younger brother, who was
still living with them at the time. My relationship with my parents remains
very challenging, and at times painful. I fully respect the path that Julianna
has chosen. Believe me, Julianna needs a very strong husband for this very
difficult situation. I wish Julianna and Perry all the best. Kudos to the
truly wise judge.
just thinking. | 12:59 p.m. Dec. 7, 2007
Well I have been thinking a lot about this situation and this is what I think of
it.
1) The parents were not very smart in taking there daughter on her wedding day. Now they will pay for what they did. And I thought the punishment fit the crime.
2) The bride and groom. I see nothing but hate and bitterness in them. For the daughter to say what she did about her father in this article is just insulting to me. You may not honor them but have some respect. I would like to know what you want from them. Jail time?
Never see them again, you got that.
3) You never herd anything from the siblings of Juliana, did they support there mom or there sister. I read in an article that the siblings of the mother were going to testify against there sister. They must have really had love at home growing up.
This is the saddest case of a family (both sides) that will never get together ever. Because of pride and because of bitterness. Lets hope the next generation comes through. and that we all learn from there mistakes.
1) The parents were not very smart in taking there daughter on her wedding day. Now they will pay for what they did. And I thought the punishment fit the crime.
2) The bride and groom. I see nothing but hate and bitterness in them. For the daughter to say what she did about her father in this article is just insulting to me. You may not honor them but have some respect. I would like to know what you want from them. Jail time?
Never see them again, you got that.
3) You never herd anything from the siblings of Juliana, did they support there mom or there sister. I read in an article that the siblings of the mother were going to testify against there sister. They must have really had love at home growing up.
This is the saddest case of a family (both sides) that will never get together ever. Because of pride and because of bitterness. Lets hope the next generation comes through. and that we all learn from there mistakes.
i wonder | 4:28 p.m. Dec. 7, 2007
I will have to say, as "just thinking" did, where are the brothers or
sisters of Julianna? Is she an only child or what? If there are brothers and
sisters, what do they have to say on the matter? They lived in the same home
with the same parents I presume. Where are they? Let them speak up. I, for
one, would like to hear how they see things.
It sounds like a few relatives on both sides have spoken up. Thank you. (But I would still like to hear from Juliana's siblings.)
It sounds like a few relatives on both sides have spoken up. Thank you. (But I would still like to hear from Juliana's siblings.)
i wonder | 6:27 p.m. Dec. 8, 2007
Dear "i wonder",
Unfortunately Julianna's sisters are also in need of therapy. Apparently they are incapable of making decisions on their own and are still under the iron fist of their Mother. Fortunately, the Mother's counseling will deal with parenting. We can only hope this will help the other sisters learn how to stand on their own two feet like Julianna.
Kathy.
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