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Kids need both mom and dad

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jackhp | 1:58 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
"Research now overwhelmingly bears out what common sense has told us: Children grow up best in the homes of two parents of opposite sexes � preferably their own parents."

Can some please cite some sources for this oft-made, yet rarely supported, claim? The American Psychological Association and the American Academy of Pediatrics have found no systematic difference between children raised by gay parents and those raised by straight parents.
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John C. | 2:21 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
I'm Sorry but this argument has nothing to do with common sense or what is best for children and society at large. It is about a group of people with abnormal behavior and wanting the world to call it normal whan there is nothing normal about it. It is about distroying not building, its about selfesh satisfaction not whats best for our society.
Hold on for the ride.
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A Teacher | 3:35 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
I whole heartedly agree. I know that death happens and divorce happens but everyone still needs a mom and a dad or at least a memory of one.

As a teacher I see the direct effect on students when they don't even have a memory of either a dad or a mom. No matter how privlidged they are, they are angry.


If gay marrige does ever become the norm, be ready for some very very angry kids in our society.

It may take awhile to show up but it will happen/
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GeeBee | 3:50 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
That's the problem with this state. You're so busy thinking about what "should be", instead of dealing with what "is"! Sure, it would be nice if ALL kids had an IDEAL household. But I for one would rather a child go to a loving home with 2 dads or 2 moms than float around a foster-care system for 18 years! Give me a break! Does your intolerance know no end!
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Duff | 4:34 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
Be careful what you wish for. If two parents of opposite sex are "required" for the effective rearing of children, then some religious wankers will insist that divorce be illegal.
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Red | 6:32 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
"Children grow up best in the homes of two parents of opposite sexes"

Logically, then, you'd be happy if the State removed all children from single-parent households and placed them with two-parent foster families where they'd "grow up best."

Should a single parent marry, the "two parents of opposite sexes" could petition the State to get the kid(s) back.

After all, if it helps only one child --
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Robert Oh | 7:43 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
If that's your reasoning then make it a law that two people need to get a fertility test before they marry.

I don't really think that is the real way you believe.

Your DESIRE is to keep gay people from marrying, your REASONING is your way to try to convince others to let your do it.
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Glorioski type Zero | 7:47 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
Look, with a more than 50% divorce rate, children need to be reared in a home with loving parents male and female, preferably.

Could anyone here give your story growing up with gay parents? We live in a more tolerant age however; introducing your best friend to mom and mom or dad and dad seems to me, at the core there would be some resentment, embarrassment or anxiety.

I would prefer to see children growing up with mommy and daddy who really love each other than with parents who stick it out because of the children. Kids know when mommy and daddy don�t' love each other and that too, will affect them and our society negatively.
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Dick | 7:56 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
1. If marriage is just a method for raising children, why does society allow marriages for people who are incapable of reproducing?

2. If children who are raised in a home other than with both of their biological parents, why do we allow divorce in cases where there are minor children?

The anti-gay marriage crowd likes to talk about how "sacred" marriage is but our society doesn't treat it as such. Marriages fail at around a 50% rate. That doesn't sound like we value marriages as much as we like to say we do. An LDS man with a temple marriage can have an affair with his secretary, leave his wife and kids for her, and then marry the secretary in the temple just a short time later. Why?

I'm not sure but perhaps a child would be better off being raised by two committed homosexuals than by a mom and step-dad with a bunch of half siblings and being passed back and forth between mulitple families every few days.

Let's face it. Our families today are so messed up that it's hard to fathom how we can say society believes and treats them as sacred.
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Anonymous | 8:29 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
1) This "overwhelming research" does NOT exist.
2) The legalization of gay marriage in Europe has nothing to do with low marriage rates WORLD WIDE. Anyone who has served an LDS mission in the last 10 years can tell you that people EVERYWHERE simply aren't getting married. It has nothing to do with gay marriage.
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Anonymous | 8:37 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
Your warm, fuzzy andy griffithworld does not exist anymore. No one who gets married should ever do so only to cause children, nor should they be expected to have them at all. Reality has changed, and your response is to simply marginalise those that no longer fit the previous 'norm'.
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At jackhp | 8:49 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
Could you cite your references please. BTW the APA is a crock with no well designed studies of significant power to yield any resonable answers.
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Jason | 9:04 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
Supporters of proposition 8 can continue telling themselves all the reasons for backing the amendment--like this one: ensuring kids have 2-parent homes. But the truth is, Proposition 8 had no effect on the ability of gays to adopt, no effect on their ability to raise their own children. All it did, in fact, was ensure that gays who do have children CANNOT get married. In other words, some children will still have gay parents, but those parents won't be entitled to the protections of marriage. How does this further the writer's beliefs?
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correlation not causation | 9:07 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
The writer repeats the dubious argument about European allowance of gay marriage and the decline of marriage in general. This argument is dubious because it confuses correlation with causation. The truth is, marriage rates began declining in those countries LONG BEFORE same-sex marriage was permitted. There is zero evidence suggesting that gay marriage was the cause of or even contributed to this decline.
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Why is your love better? | 9:31 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
Richard, why do you consider my relationship self-indulgent and yet yours is not? What's the difference between you choosing to live your life with the person you love and me doing the same? Why is your expression of love so mucn more important than mine? My partner and I have been together 25 years, and if it was only about feeling the "warm fuzzies" it probably would've ended years ago - like at least 50% of heterosexual marriages do. Some people seem to feel that Gay men and women marying will end traditional "straight" marriage when that is something "YOU" are responsible for - not "US". We're not responsible for the high divorce rate in this country - you are. Do you honestly believe that if I was given the right to marry, suddenly it would fall out of fashion with straight couples? That they would no longer want the tax breaks and legal protections it provides? If it's all about the children, then it's amazing that this much effort isn't being put into ways of really bolstering straight marriages instead of just denying them to others.
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Cliff | 10:05 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
I ave to agree with John C.

This argument is based on false premise, that reproduction is the primary purpose of marriage.

This is of course a premise of LDS doctrine, but it is certainly NOT the case in Europe or among progressive, educated Americans.

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RangerGordon | 10:41 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
What exactly does "smear" mean, and when did it become a magic word that allows you to dismiss an opposing viewpoint without actually addressing its issues?

Proposition 8 had nothing to do with protecting any marriage between a man and a woman. Read its language: It was an order for the government to deny marriage licenses to certain couples, based on gender.

Proposition 8 supporters should not fool themselves: All it did was grind California gays and lesbians under the bootheels of meddlesome government.

I suspect many of them are concerned about excessive, intrusive government. But they should not complain when the wolf they themselves unleashed comes howling at their own doors.
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Too Bad | 10:58 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
It is unfortunate that when the LDS church exercises its consitutional right of freedom of expression, those with opposite views get offended. They start crying about how intolerant the Church is. How pathetic is that!!! Grow up and realize that the votes were cast and Prop 8 was pasted. Then to single out the LDS as the only supporter of Prop 8 just proves how INTOLERANT some people are. The LDS doctrine must be true if everyone is focusing solely on them.
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dcc | 11:21 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
If you want two parent families then proposition your church to make divorce punishable by excommunication. Until you do that you're just a bigot.
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Darin | 11:40 a.m. Nov. 8, 2008
Of all the sham arguments against gay marriage, this one has a veneer so thin I cannot imagine why everyone cannot see through it.

Single-parent homes and orphans exist because people die, they divorce, and they bear children out of wedlock. Gay marriage is not the reason for single-parent homes, or children without parents. Ugh, can we please stop lying about this? (and the social trends in Europe.)
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