Reader comments
Should Utah revise sex ed?

I am constantly amazed at the inconsistency of thinking when it come to sex education compared to drivers education. In SE there are those who say, "if we teach them how, they will go do it." SO? In DE, we do teach them so they will do it...and amazingly a large number become responsible drivers, perhaps youngsters taught early enough and completely enough, can also become responsible in their sex lives.

We already have rogue drivers and sexual practitioners who show irresponsible handling in their daily lives, perhaps it's time to show a little respect for those who eventually could grow up with healthy attitudes toward both endeavors.

Abstinence should definitely be discussed in health class. But the 'c' word and other alternatives should also be discussed...which isn't happening in certain districts in Utah. Realize that any kid going to a public school is going to hear about all sorts of things from other kids, and a responsible parent or a health teacher needs to be able to set the record straight. Unfortunately, too many parents don't act responsibly, aren't involved enough in their child's life, and then act surprised when their kid becomes a parent...and the health teachers are told not to say the 'c' word by the local school board.

"If we can have a comprehensive approach with abstinence as the foundation and provide medically reliable information about contraception we would be doing the most we can to keep teens healthy."

Kids KNOW that abstinence prevents birth as well as STDs. The only abstinence program should be an opening sentence that says "If you don't want to get pregnant or get a sexually transmitted disease, don't have sex." After that, realize that teenagers are going to experiment with their bodies, their social positions, and everything else they are until they feel comfortable in what they are.

A sex education program that works to prevent these negative outcomes has to be completely open, frank, and even graphic. No dissembling about it. Recognize that sex should be a pleasurable and pair-bonding event and not a reason to go hide in the closet after you have done it the first time.

As a health teacher, I am appalled at the scarcity of information that we are allowed to impart to our students. Although I believe abstinence is the 100% sure way to prevent pregnancy and STD's, we have to be realistic. Hormones rage strong in these kids who have not got the maturity of brain or will power to always make the right choices. Some will have the best intentions and slip up. Others will rebel because they can. Others will cave to peer pressure. "Just Say NO" doesn't work with drugs or sex. Knowledge is power. Empower our students with knowledge and choices.

Our State does not properly teach sex ed, and the parents don't want the state to teach it either. If there were no requirement to address it the schools would not do so. Parents should shoulder the full responsibility of teaching their children Sex ed, and not the schools. Actually, since the schools aren't allowed to actually teach it, they already do. The message that is out is no sex till married, and that has not been working. I will teach my own the same thing with the added 'once you get married' and you are to poor to afford children, this is how to delay children till you are financially responsible parents.

But if parents don't want sex ed taught yet don't want teen pregnancy at a high rate, they should allow condom distribution laws to change. Condoms are completely invisible in the State so it shouldn't surprise anyone when young people don't use them.

It seems some people want to sex-ed to be based upon their religious teachings or philosophy, and not science. Sex-ed should be based upon what experience teaches us keeps disease and unwanted pregnancy the lowest. If this is abstinence only then so be it. But if it is a comprehensive approach that teaches abstinence and condoms then so be that. If it is a condoms only approach, then so be that too. Lets do what works.

The low highest pregnancy rates were in low income areas. How about reforming welfare for teen-moms to discourage wanting to be a teen mom. This is taught from generation to generation-how to live off the welfare system. There is a reason why parents in low income places do not preach birth control use. They are very much aware of birth control. The welfare programs offer very little for single adults without kids. This means get the first kid early and the government will help take care of you. How about requiring 12 hour days of education in order to have any government assistance if you are under 18 with child?

Listen. Let's face it. No amount of preaching and no amount of "abstinence-based" pseudo-education is going to stop teens from screwing. Think back to puberty--yes, sex was all that you thought about. Teens need to be taught about the birds and bees and contraception in school, yearly, starting with 7th grade. Most parents here will do their best to keep their children ignorant and pray that an "accident" doesn't happen.

Such intensely personal and intimate matters should be left only to the parents to discuss with their children. Government employees or social workers have no right to impose their views on impressionable children, when the family is the unit with the most long term interest in the outcome of such decisions. Get rid of public sex education altogether, which more often invites children to abuse the powers of procreation rather than to use them wisely.

The CDC website does have state specific numbers, and yes, the numbers for Utah are up, although still well below the national average.

To Less Government; Proper health information given in school health classes, including sex education given in general terms, not religious rants or political rants will improve the human way of life for all people now and in the future. Thats what schools are about. Knowledge and information equal the ability to make intelligent decissions.
Intensely personal and intimate improprietys would include discussing various "positions and or methods". No thinking person would want to do that anyhow. In order to think, we all need information.

Use Common Sense:

As a parent I have both the responsiblity and the knowledge to teach my children in these matters. I certainly do not wnat clueless dullards like you influencing my children on such critical matters. Get out of my life.

It is impossible to separate one's views on sex from his religious or non-religious belief system. If the legislature or the school board mandates that this topic be addressed in public schools, it violates the establishment clause of the constitution, which protects us from government mandated indoctrination. The general rule must place responsibility on parents who may or may not choose the assistance of their church. Perhaps, if parents had to support unwed teen-age mothers and their babies, they would take this responsibility more seriously.

Get real. Kids do and will have sex. Be frank and teach them the facts. Teens will make up their own minds just like we did.

If I want my children to understand proper gun safety, I'm not going to rely on someone else to teach them. I teach them myself so I know they've been taught correctly. It's the same thing with sex-ed. Improper knowledge about sex is just as dangerous as improper knowledge about guns. Parents should shoulder the teaching themselves. They should also understand that no matter how embarrassing they may find it, they are going to have to be up front about everything and educate their children or someone else will and that someone else may not teach them what the child needs to know to be properly informed and educated. They may very well end up hurting themselves and others. Do you as parents want the blame for that upon your shoulders?

NO amount of teaching kids about condoms is going to stop them from having sex either. And quite franky, will only increase kids interest in sex.

Sex education is not the proper providence of schools, but can only be properly be taught by parents.

The only thing that should be taught in health classes are about the deseases one can get. Teaching about condon use wiio only encourage kids because they will believe they will be safe.

It's a fine idea to think the parents should be the ones to teach their children about sex and what is, and is not, healthy/smart.

How many parents actually do that? Mine didn't. All that "sex talk" amounted to for me was my dad telling me not to look at the one Playboy mag he had stashed away downstairs, and my mom told me she'd kill me if I did it before I was maried.

Most of my friends had their parents tell them what sex is, but nothing beyond that.

Again, it's a great concept to believe that parents will teach their kids the right way to deal with sex, but they don't. So the schools will continue to do so, and if they don't, then pop culture and the internet will teach kids about sex.

Wouldn't that be great?

Let's be honest here...we all know that parents know about sex--that is how they became parents in the first place. Not all parents know HOW to teach their kids about sex, and not all parents even address the issue with their kids.

Teens need to know more than they are being taught ... this does not mean that they need all the explicit details from their high school teacher. I think that there are too many teens that are sexually active that obviously know how to have sex, but they do not know how to have safe sex and they do not know how reliable certain contraceptives are. Honestly, I don't think that many parents really know how reliable and safe the "safe sex" methods their teens are using actually are. (talk to any high-schooler and see what kids are doing to keep themselves from getting pregnant ... you would be amazed)

More definitely needs to be taught in the schools, but not everything.

For my brother and I, our good parents gave us a copy of Brother Packers "Little Factorys" for our home sex education learning experience. Now that was an eye opener.
Fact is: To many parents do not know how to properly address the sex issue. Properly explained in a setting that is set up by both parents and school personal, with rules, is the sure fire way to get the right information out there.

I think we have to decide which we hate the most, watching the upward trend in teen pregnancies or teaching our kids how to prevent these unwanted pregnancies. Abstinence is always best, but our kids are not immune to the sexualization of our society. Sex is everywhere, and most of our kids no longer think there's anything wrong with it! We're losing the battle, folks, and compounding the problem by denying the information that sexually active teens need is self-defeating. I speak from experience.