How to become the grandparents from heaven

Published: Monday, March 25 2013 11:10 a.m. MDT

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"Grandparents rarely offer their children [assistance without interference]. Within the family, assistance and interference come as a package," said Bryan Caplan, author of "Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids."

Instead, grandparents should try to be "quietly useful."

"Don't bundle your babysitting or other assistance with unwanted advice about how to raise your grandchildren or run the household."

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AreaReader
Suburbs, AZ

"Experts agree that when children have meltdowns, trying to soothe or distract them sends the message that it’s okay to lose control."

Experts agree? I didn't think that experts agreed on anything regarding raising children, and if a few of them do happen to agree, just give things a few years and the advice will change.

Dennis
Harwich, MA

Being a good grandparent means giving both you kids and grandchildren a LOT of space. If you're involved with them more than twice a month it's selfish interference, not love.

Don Bugg
Prince Frederick, MD

I think I can understand why Dennis feels as he does, but I can't understand what makes him think he is in a position to establish "twice a month" as a universal standard. The frequency of grandparental involvement is going to vary a great deal from family to family, and there's no reason to think more than twice a month is necessarily equal to "selfish interference."

UtahBlueDevil
Durham, NC

"Being a good grandparent means giving both you kids and grandchildren a LOT of space. If you're involved with them more than twice a month it's selfish interference, not love."

Wow... I would love to know the justification of this statement. Twice a month. I am not a grand parent... but I think I would disagree with this kind of a "rule" and judgement behind the motivation... pretty much 100%.

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