Some of the best and the worst (and other honors) for the Salt Lake Winter Olympics:BEST PERFORMANCES IN THE OPENING CEREMONIES — The singing cop's rendition of "God Bless America," the stadium entrance of the World Trade Center flag, Sting singing "Fragile" with the MoTabs and Yo-Yo Ma, the MoTabs singing "Call of the Champions" set to fireworks. It doesn't get any better.
BEST MOMENTS OF CLOSING CEREMONIES — Willie Nelson, Harry Connick Jr. and our own Laura Garff Lewis.
WORST ACT OF THE CEREMONIES — Christina Aguilera dresses like a hooker for the closing ceremonies, with families all over the world watching. Hey, honey, time and place. . . . Then there was KISS. Like we wanted to look at some old guy's hairy chest.
BEST TEARS — NBC's never-ending search for tears was rewarded by Derek Parra's heartfelt "I love you" to his wife in the stands. Was there ever a humbler champion than this guy?
BEST KARMA MOMENT — Jean Racine and Gea Johnson take fifth in bobsled. (Reminder: Racine dumped her longtime partner and pal Jen Davidson for Johnson, then tried to recruit Vonetta Flowers from the USA 2 sled to replace an injured Johnson. With teammates like this . . . .)
BEST KARMA MOMENT II — Flowers resists Racine's invitation and stays with partner Jill Bakken. They win gold. A nice moment.
CLASSIEST SPORTSMAN — When Apolo Ohno was knocked to the ice just yards from a gold medal, Americans were angry — but not Ohno. He smiled and said, "That's our sport." He won gold and silver in four races and never made it to the finish line first because of a series of mishaps, but he never had one bad word to say about anything even after being disqualified himself.
WORST THING ABOUT THE TV COVERAGE — Not only did there seem to be more commercials than Olympic coverage, but they kept showing the same three or four ads over and over again for 17 days. Home Depot, Kevin Bacon, AT&T, Bud — oh, please, someone just hit me over the head with a hammer!!!
BEST OLYMPIC COMMERCIAL — Has there ever been a better commercial anywhere, anytime, than the Nike commercial? Not one spoken word, just great music and artsy footage of people playing hard. It was almost enough to make you forget Bacon.
BEST SPORTS REVELATION — Short-track speedskating gained new fans with its speed, spills, and tight finishes. Too bad we get to see it only once every four years. One suggestion: How about longer straightaways so the race is more than just left turns?
BEST EXCUSE FOR MEN TO FOLLOW SPEEDSKATING — Germany's beautiful, statuesque gold medalist, Anni Friesinger. She's Anna Kournikova . . . except she's got game.
MOST DISAPPOINTING EVENT — The women's figure skating finals. Sure, Sarah Hughes' victory was great theater, but the skating on the final night was mediocre at best. Michelle Kwan, Sasha Cohen and Irina Slutskaya (the latter two clearly the most talented in the field) simply collapsed under the pressure. Either that, or those were doubles that skated for them in the short program.
QUIDDITCH PLAYER OF THE YEAR — Simon Amman, the 121-pound Harry Potter look-alike, strikes double gold in ski jumping.
BEST SIGNS THAT THE OLYMPICS WERE CHARMED — Inversion and cold weather end when Olympics begin. Cold weather begins when Olympics end.
MAN LEAST LIKELY TO MOVE TO SALT LAKE CITY ANYTIME SOON — Woody Paige.
Doug Robinson's column runs on Tuesdays. E-MAIL drob@desnews.com .
© 2002 Deseret News Publishing Company