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Ex-porn star leaves industry, finds faith

Published: Wednesday, Aug. 5 2015 3:42 a.m. MDT

After seven years of participating in hundreds of films within the adult entertainment industry, Brittni has decided to change her life and turn to God instead. (XXXChurch.org) After seven years of participating in hundreds of films within the adult entertainment industry, Brittni has decided to change her life and turn to God instead. (XXXChurch.org)

After seven years of participating in hundreds of films within the adult entertainment pornography industry, Brittni has decided to change her life and turn to God instead.

In a video produced by the XXXChurch, a Christian-based online ministry that fights porn addiction, Brittni shared her personal trials and the happiness she has now found. She expressed that it was after several visits with the XXXChurch that she was able to find the love she had been searching for.

"Thank you Jesus, I found him, I'm home," Brittni said in the video. "I have finally encountered the unconditional love of God, and I will never go back."

After seven years of participating in hundreds of films within the adult entertainment industry, Brittni has decided to change her life and turn to God instead. (XXXChurch.org) After seven years of participating in hundreds of films within the adult entertainment industry, Brittni has decided to change her life and turn to God instead. (XXXChurch.org)

Brittni first began to consider what a different lifestyle would be like when she encountered Rachel Collins, an XXXChurch representative who was preaching at a porn convention. Collins was able to describe to Brittni a message of hope in a nonjudgmental way.

"I would stop by at the XXXChurch booth to see her," Brittni said. "I want to thank her for all of her kind words and loving spirit. I don't know if she realizes how she impacted me or not, but her being so kind and nonjudgmental always felt so good. I never felt love in my life, and I was looking for it in all the wrong places. ... I thank her from the bottom of my heart, and I will never forget what she has done for me."

Brittni cautioned that her involvement in the adult entertainment industry didn't originally begin as something she had planned to pursue. Rather, Brittni dreamed of making it big in Hollywood, and believed she would get closer one movie at a time.

"I always felt like I had to say yes to everything because I felt that would give me credibility as a star," Brittni said. "Wanting to be famous my whole life, I guess resorted to wanting to be loved; but sharing that side of yourself and becoming so empty and feeling so helpless, like there's just no hope, you dig such a hole that you're in a pit of self-pity, it's not worth it."

During that time, Brittni made several attempts at suicide in order to escape the emotional pain she felt. Now as her life has changed completely, no longer relying on drugs to numb her pain, Brittni expressed the importance of knowing your own self-worth.

"As women, we are worth it, we are worth love, we are worth real love and you're not going to get that love from the industry," Brittni said. "I feel like there are going to be many more souls in that industry that are going to be saved. I feel like you guys have been praying and Jesus is answering these prayers right now."

Email: spetersen@deseretnews.com

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