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Rock On: Messing with the Mailman

Published: Wednesday, July 29 2015 5:55 a.m. MDT

Karl Malone talks with members of the media prior to being inducted into the Utah Sports Hall of Fame Tuesday, Oct. 23, 2012 at Energy Solutions Arena. (Scott G Winterton, Deseret News) Karl Malone talks with members of the media prior to being inducted into the Utah Sports Hall of Fame Tuesday, Oct. 23, 2012 at Energy Solutions Arena. (Scott G Winterton, Deseret News)

HEAD GAMES

Ah, the Mailman. Where has he been?

Jazz icon Karl Malone made news recently on two fronts. First came the announcement he would be a part-time instructor for the team’s frontcourt players.

Then, appearing on “The Dan Patrick Show," he said his all-time NBA team would include John Stockton, Wilt Chamberlain, Oscar Robertson, LeBron James and …Scottie Pippen?

This outraged Michael Jordan fans, to which Malone tweeted, “Calm down little grasshoppers, if you people don’t think MJ is in my top 5 you have to hear the whole interview.”

He also tweeted he was “just messing” with Patrick.

Is that anything like the messing Pippen did in 1997 when he said the Mailman doesn’t deliver on Sunday?

REGULAR JOES

If Malone sounded off base, consider his former opponent, Dennis Rodman.

The Worm said if matched against stars of the ‘80s and ‘90s, LeBron James would have been “just an average player.”

FILE - In this May 30, 2013, file photo, Miami Heat forward Chris Andersen reacts after blocking a shot by Indiana Pacers forward Tyler Hansbrough during Game 5 in the NBA basketball playoffs Eastern Conference finals, in Miami. Back in 1996 in the Iola High School gym, the NBA player now known as FILE - In this May 30, 2013, file photo, Miami Heat forward Chris Andersen reacts after blocking a shot by Indiana Pacers forward Tyler Hansbrough during Game 5 in the NBA basketball playoffs Eastern Conference finals, in Miami. Back in 1996 in the Iola High School gym, the NBA player now known as "Birdman" was just Chris Andersen a clean-cut, 6-foot-11 center who made opponents' trips into the lane a nightmare. (AP Photo/Lynne Sladky, File) (Lynne Sladky, AP)

Apparently that would also render tattoo-covered Miami swingman Chris Andersen “just an average sideshow.”

BEST BET

From the Department of Scrambled Brains comes this: Boxer Floyd Mayweather reportedly risked a $5.9 million bet on the Miami Heat in Game 7 of the Eastern Conference finals, in order to win $600,000.

Sources say Mayweather next plans to bet $11 million that Spurs coach Gregg Popovich uses the word “copacetic” again in a press conference, to which Charles Barkley will reply, “Yeah, I get heartburn, too.”

NO FEAR

Central Park recently looked into stories about snakehead fish, or “Frankenfish” that can survive for days outside water and crawl on their fins.

But officials say that after surviving both Billy Martin and Plaxico Burress, New Yorkers aren’t all that scared.

OFF TARGET

Speaking of Burress, he’s launching a line of luxury men’s socks that cost $29 a pair.

Sorry to pick at old wounds, but at those prices, doesn’t it seem Burress is shooting himself in the foot?

CRASH COURSE

Twitter reportedly had a mini-crash last week, but was quickly restored.

Company officials appear confident that if Jose Canseco’s tweets don’t permanently bring it down, nothing will.

LONDON LINEUP

The NFL is looking into having a team in London within several years.

But sources say the league is having a hard time convincing its teams that pork pie pregame meals and halftime tea breaks are a good idea.

SEINFELD SENIORS

Rock On isn’t saying the Spurs looked old in Game 2, but doesn’t the fact Tim Duncan wanted to stay at Del Boca Vista say something?

Email: rock@desnews.com; Twitter: therockmonster; Facebook: therockmonster

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