Protesters across Europe paused from torching cars and throwing rocks last week to celebrate the European Union winning the Nobel Peace Prize.
Jubilant EU officials said they would be happy to travel to Oslo to accept the prize, except they can't seem to find the money for airfare.
Meanwhile, the Greeks are wondering what the peace prize might fetch on eBay.
There hasn't been this much head-scratching since the Nobel committee awarded Barack Obama for not being named George W. Bush.
I don't want to say gas prices are high in California, but it's now just about cheaper to buy a new SUV — provided it comes with a full tank — than it is to fill up the old one.
They don't call it the Golden State for nothing. And right now, gold is going for about three gallons an ounce there.
Hugo Chavez proved last week that you can win an election even if you don't win a debate, or even submit to one.
All you need is a winning smile, a warm personality and the power to force all media to broadcast your speeches, force government workers to campaign for you and suppress dissent.
Salt Lake County officials have decided to send out property tax notices this week rather than wait until early November, which is too close to Halloween. One scary thing at a time, please.
Meanwhile, health officials are still cool to my festive idea — spook house flu-shot clinics. At some point during the scary tour of a haunted house, a monster would come out of nowhere and stab customers with a syringe. Why not make health care fun?
Jay Evensen is the associate editor of the Deseret News editorial page. Follow him on Twitter @jayevensen.
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