A new episode the Mormon Channel series, "His Grace," opens with a startling quote:
“I remember sitting at my house in Maine, and I just looked at the fireplace, and I thought ‘What if I just put my baby in there and just walked away?’...What kind of mother has thoughts like that?”
A woman named Lindsay explains her struggle with postpartum anxiety and OCD in the video.
According to the American Psychological Association, up to one in seven women can experience postpartum depression or anxiety.
Lindsay called her anxiety “piercing and instant,” following the birth of her daughter. Despite being excited to have a baby before she gave birth, all Lindsay could feel was worry after her daughter’s entrance into the world.
Lindsay said in the video her faith faltered because she couldn’t feel anything from Christ. “I felt like my issue was bigger than the Atonement of the Savior,” she said. “I felt like I couldn’t rely on that because I couldn’t feel him.”
Lindsay faced her anxiety by seeking help from her doctor and therapist, having her mom come to help with the baby and by looking for the Atonement's influence in unexpected ways.
Watch the video here.
See another "His Grace" video here.