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Jay Evensen: On Second Thought

Published: Monday, Aug. 4 2014 12:00 a.m. MDT

Is it just a coincidence that children are streaming across the border and Congress has decided to go on recess?

Jacquelyn Martin, Associated Press

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A lighthearted look at news of the day:

Is it just a coincidence that children are streaming across the border and Congress has decided to go on recess?

100 years ago last week, World War I began. By the end, the Ottoman Empire had been destroyed, which gave rise to modern Turkey, where the deputy prime minister last week gave a speech calling on women to stop laughing in public. As they say, once war begins, no one can predict the consequences.

No offense to the deputy prime minister, but any man who has to tell women to stop laughing probably has more problems than just trying to win an election.

Turkey’s deputy prime minister also said it was time for women to do less talking on their cell phones in public. He’s in the wrong job. He should be the secretary of paranoia.

Of course, if the Ottomans had spent less time talking about trivial things on their cell phones, they might still have their empire intact.

CIA Director John Brennan apologized to members of the Senate intelligence committee last week after it was learned that spies had secretly accessed their computers. He also said he was sorry for messing up some of their World of Warcraft scores.

It sounds like Ed Snowden was right. The United States really is obsessed with spying on its own people. Which makes you wonder why we can’t seem to spy on Ed Snowden.

Seriously, what could be so important on a Senate member’s computer? Here’s a typical journal entry: “July 20 – Almost agreed to pass an important bill today, then remembered I hate the other party.”

Actually, Congress isn’t as gridlocked as one might think. Just last week, the House agreed to sue the president.

The lawsuit contends the president is misusing his power by changing laws without the consent of Congress. With any luck, this will wind its way through the legal system in time for the 2024 election.

Researchers in Wales have found that people spread fewer germs through fist bumps than by shaking hands the conventional way. Makes sense. How many boxers do you see with the common cold?

The problem with fist bumps is they have to be timed right and given the correct velocity. Most people would prefer a common cold to broken knuckles.

Also, fist bumps can be misinterpreted. Imagine if Jimmy Carter had tried to fist bump Anwar Sadaat and Menachem Begin after the Camp David accord in 1978. We might still be seeing violence in the Middle East.

Jay Evensen is the senior editorial columnist at the Deseret News. Email him at even@desnews.com. For more content, visit his web site, jayevensen.com.

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