I'm dating this guy who first was 28, then 36. Now I'm finding out that he's actually 42! I understand lying about your age in some settings, but to the girl you're seeing? And lying more than once? It was this big thing when he came clean about not actually being 28. I'm 26, and I told him the age difference didn't bother me. Plus, he's aging really well and he did look a little older, but I honestly could not tell. But why "come clean" about being 36, when you're actually 42? It doesn't make any sense to me. I care for him, but I think the lying is more than I can handle. Am I making a big deal out of this? Do you think I'll regret breaking up with him?
Has anyone dated someone who would lie about random things? Looking for some insights!
You'll probably be sad when the relationship ends because breakups aren't fun. But the drama that comes from dating someone who lies about random stuff is the most annoying and unnecessary drama ever.
He is obviously sensitive about his age, so maybe consider saying something like, "I really care for you, and how old someone is is not my biggest consideration when it comes to dating, but honesty is. I'm uncomfortable being in a relationship with someone who won't be honest with me."
And then opt for friendship, if possible. Maybe you'll learn more about him, maybe he'll become more comfortable being honest with you, or maybe you'll stop speaking altogether.
Whatever the outcome, you are taking the happier route by not becoming romantically involved with someone who won't be honest.
Readers: How would you advise HowOldRU? Do you think the man can/will change? Or is dishonesty becoming a part of their relationship?
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Angela Trusty is a millennial writer who lives and writes about the young adult Mormon experience. Twitter: askange_column