Frank Pignanelli & LaVarr Webb: Foggy weather and inversion herald legislative session

Published: Sunday, Jan. 26 2014 12:00 a.m. MST

Nervous legislators: "I appreciate the issues restaurant owners have raised regarding the ‘Zion Curtain.’" ("The Big Guy has spoken. I'm not getting involved in this one.")

Male legislators: "I continue to respect the passion and determination of House Minority Leader Jen Seelig." ("She intimidates me.")

GOP legislators: "I remain committed to fight against the encroaching federal government, the socialist Obama administration, left-wing advocacy groups who threaten to undermine the moral fabric of this country, a United Nations that is working for global domination, and any threat to our beloved Constitution and way of life." (“There, that should take care of my delegates for a week or two.”)

Democratic legislators: "I remain committed to fight against those who wish to dismantle important federal programs that provide a safety net for disadvantaged citizens, anti-Obamacare activities, right-wing advocacy groups who threaten to undermine the civil liberties of this country, large corporations working for global domination, and any threat to our beloved Constitution and way of life." (“There, that should take care of my delegates for a week or two.")

Visiting members of Utah's congressional delegation: "I always enjoy reporting to my valued friends in the Legislature." ("Do I have to do this again? Every session it’s more whining and carping about the federal government.”)

Lobbyists: "We are in the business of providing information to help lawmakers in their important deliberations." ("With 35 clients, how do I juggle their competing interests?")

Endnote:Republican LaVarr Webb is a political consultant and lobbyist. Previously he was policy deputy to Gov. Mike Leavitt and Deseret News managing editor. Email: lwebb@exoro.com. Democrat Frank Pignanelli is a Salt Lake attorney, lobbyist and political adviser. Pignanelli served 10 years in the Utah House of Representatives, six years as minority leader. His spouse, D’Arcy Dixon Pignanelli, is a state tax commissioner. Email: frankp@xmission.com.

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